Destruction of Our Property

[Crystal]

Unfortunately this is where my mind went to also. If someone would have gotten hurt while the kids,were unsupervised it would open the provider to a serious and devastating lawsuit, far beyond just losing their license

Exactly. This could have been FAR worse than it was.

[Jack Sprat]

I wouldn't ask them to replace it. I understand what you were doing. However, I have gotten to the point where every child is in our playroom while I am taking the little one to the toilet(bathroom is in playroom), while I am going to the toilet etc.. Where I go they go, where they go I go.

[Familycare71]

If they were younger you could get in trouble for not directly supervising.

If they were older but had a history of distruction of property, stealing, lying etc it's still on you because you were aware of the potential for bad behavior and didn't supervise to prevent more from happening again.

I'm sorry about your fence (genuinely I am because I looove stuff like that), but perhaps you could reconsider letting them around such treasured items in the future. Same would go for books that are on loan and the like.

I hate to think what could have happened had it not been the fence they went after. It's obvious this crew, your kiddo included, need line of sight supervision from here on out. If you can't accommodate that need it may be time to term.


I'd be careful to review your discipline regs for your state as well. Here having a kiddo sit on time out on the couch the rest of the day would be grounds for pulling my license.


It was a flub. Learn as much as you can from it and do what you need to do to prevent it from happening in the future!

.
I hear and agree with all PP concerns... IMO it was your bad- you allowed children who have caused destruction before out of your sight. They have showed you before they couldn't be trusted... And i dont know if I'm reading between the lines too much but it sounds like your child(ren) have been termed before for similar destruction...
I also think sitting on a couch all day is way too harsh and wouldn't be allowed where I am either. But I think the helping to rebuild the fence is a good choice.
I would just re- evaluate your day... It sounds like with the group you have pottying alone may be too much independence- And like Chrystal said- it could have been much worse than a fence being destroyed with a bat!

[momofboys]

I think if I read correctly the sitting on the couch was for her own child. can.licensing really dictate discipline for our own children?

[Familycare71]

I think if I read correctly the sitting on the couch was for her own child. can.licensing really dictate discipline for our own children?

Her child was sent to her room... The dck was placed on the couch for the rest of the day.

[craftymissbeth]

I think if I read correctly the sitting on the couch was for her own child. can.licensing really dictate discipline for our own children?

I don't know about OP's regs, but here in Kansas our discipline policy must be used for our children as well. I can't do anything discipline wise with my son that I wouldn't do with a dck... and whatever it is that we choose to do as far as discipline cannot stray from our written discipline policy.

[Willow]

I don't know about OP's regs, but here in Kansas our discipline policy must be used for our children as well. I can't do anything discipline wise with my son that I wouldn't do with a dck... and whatever it is that we choose to do as far as discipline cannot stray from our written discipline policy.

It's the same way here.

[crazy_8]

At the time of posting this I was pretty hot. I know I can't sit a kid down on the couch for the rest of the day and he didn't stay there all day. He had his time there and then he was up with the rest of the kids. My daughter was sent to her room to clean it and then was included in meals/snacks and what have you. I appreciate what JosieGirl had to say. My kitchen is within earshot of my backyard. The window overlooks the back yard and I keep it open. No, my children have never been term'd for destructive behavior. My daycare provider at the time didn't supervise the kids much at all. We were lifelong friends and I think that she had it in her head that my kids were part of the family. Her son got to be at that curious age. Sexually curious age. And when she caught him and my daughter kissing, it was suddenly our fault and she term'd us without even talking it out. They've never destroyed anyone's personal property outside what normal kids their ages do to their toys on occasion. I came here looking for advise and got completely torn apart. The step incident, I will admit, was a lack of supervision and was wrong on my part. In talking with the kids about it it was the DCK's idea and they followed suit instead of telling me. I never pushed the subject with the parent. Today was one of those fluke situations where I was there one minute, turned my back and crap happened. All I wanted was some advice on how to handle the situation. I'm not the kind of person who doesn't own their own crap. I'm not going to intentionally be negligent and then try to charge the parents. I'll own my mistakes and learn from them. I'm sorry I even posted here.

[Familycare71]

I am sorry you feel that way- I can personally say it is never my intent to make someone regret posting.
For me - the post read wrong I guess. What I read was that these kids were destructive prior and then left alone again to be destructive. That was the main understanding I took that formed my opinion.
I understand saying something in the heat of the moment (boy and the couch) as I am a venter myself. I think it just added, for me, to the overall tone.
I do understand things can happen in an instant. I don't see how anyone with kids can't. I really liked the idea of what you said about having them help rebuild the fence- that sounds like a good consequence to me.

[Josiegirl]

Cripe, I've had a baby whacked with a toy as I was RIGHT THERE changing her. There's another post telling how her son's GI tube was ripped out in an instant by a 2 yo. She couldn't stop him. All those who bit@hed others out, you must all be saints. I am careful. I am over protective. I am intelligent. I am not lazy. I am not neglectful. I detest it when people judge others, read their own interpretations between the lines, get on their own high horses, etc.
Yes, crap like this on forums make me fearful of posting also.

[Kaddidle Care]

Plain and simple - kids do stupid things - unpredictable things - things that you could never imagine doing yourself as a kid.

Just get after them like white on rice and learn from it.

A kid can use anything as a weapon or object of destruction. I would eliminate any long stick/club like items while the littles are in your care. The problem is, you can't avoid everything. I once saw a child grab another child's head and give it a mighty twist (like you see in violent movies) that could have snapped the neck! I was across the room and couldn't get there fast enough but I yelled to get him to stop.

Be careful of what your children are watching on TV or the computer because they are learning harmful acts in full color.

I'm sorry to hear this happened but since your own child was involved, I wouldn't expect the other parent to pay for it. I would let them know what happened so they can avoid a future reoccurrence.

[Crystal]

Cripe, I've had a baby whacked with a toy as I was RIGHT THERE changing her. There's another post telling how her son's GI tube was ripped out in an instant by a 2 yo. She couldn't stop him. All those who bit@hed others out, you must all be saints. I am careful. I am over protective. I am intelligent. I am not lazy. I am not neglectful. I detest it when people judge others, read their own interpretations between the lines, get on their own high horses, etc.
Yes, crap like this on forums make me fearful of posting also.

I'm not seeing where anyone "bitched" her out. I am seeing that we shared our opinions, gave advice and stated facts about the need to properly supervise. I MIGHT be wrong, but the original post was the TRUTH, which was later changed to meet the providers needs. So when reading that first post, it clearly states that the children were allowed to play outside, completely unsupervised, and property was destroyed. She clearly stated that she was inside cleaning the kitchen and preparing for the next meal....that is NOT a two minute deal, and the children were left alone long enough to use a BASEBALL BAT to destroy property. My advice may have come off as harsh......I don't WANT to seem like a b****, but if that is what it takes to make a VERY important point about the need for close supervision, especially of children who are KNOWN to destroy things, and to hopefully help prevent a MAJOR injury (which very well could have happened with a BASEBALL BAT) then I guess I am a b****.

[Crystal]

Plain and simple - kids do stupid things - unpredictable things - things that you could never imagine doing yourself as a kid.

Just get after them like white on rice and learn from it.

A kid can use anything as a weapon or object of destruction. I would eliminate any long stick/club like items while the littles are in your care. The problem is, you can't avoid everything. I once saw a child grab another child's head and give it a mighty twist (like you see in violent movies) that could have snapped the neck! I was across the room and couldn't get there fast enough but I yelled to get him to stop.

Be careful of what your children are watching on TV or the computer because they are learning harmful acts in full color.

I'm sorry to hear this happened but since your own child was involved, I wouldn't expect the other parent to pay for it. I would let them know what happened so they can avoid a future reoccurrence.

You're right, things can and do happen when we are RIGHT there. The difference is, we were supervising directly and could NOT prevent it. The OP's situation very easily could have been prevented if the children, who are known to destroy things and have behavioral issues, were directly supervised and did not have free range access to a baseball bat. Licensing would weigh the situation where a child was injured....if the provider was right there supervising and someone was injured she is FAR less likely to be held liable than if she was allowing them to play outside, alone.

[Willow]

Cripe, I've had a baby whacked with a toy as I was RIGHT THERE changing her. There's another post telling how her son's GI tube was ripped out in an instant by a 2 yo. She couldn't stop him. All those who bit@hed others out, you must all be saints. I am careful. I am over protective. I am intelligent. I am not lazy. I am not neglectful. I detest it when people judge others, read their own interpretations between the lines, get on their own high horses, etc.
Yes, crap like this on forums make me fearful of posting also.

If a child ripped out another childs GI tube, and then the provider gave that child the opportunity to do it again.....yes. That's a lack of supervision issue and there is no way around it. If I were said parent I would SUE THE LIVING CRAP out of a provider who was that level of negligent.

So you can be snarky, and snotty all you want. No one bit@hed her out so quit with the dramatics. The responses here were actually very diplomatic in my view and don't at all reflect the tone licensing themselves would take. If children are able to destroy stairs and fences they are definitely not being supervised by sight OR sound. That is beyond dangerous. It is definitely against licensing regs. It is absolutely light years difference away from a child hurting another when you are sitting right there. It's frightening that you don't see the stark difference between such VERY different issues.


If you want to dance around the fact that these multiple incidents could have resulted in someone getting seriously hurt and a provider losing their job then go ahead. But don't chastise those who choose honesty over a fake, everyone makes these mistakes, ego stroke.

Sounds like OP has a better plan in place for the future. In the end that is all that matters.

[Familycare71]

I'm not seeing where anyone "bitched" her out. I am seeing that we shared our opinions, gave advice and stated facts about the need to properly supervise. I MIGHT be wrong, but the original post was the TRUTH, which was later changed to meet the providers needs. So when reading that first post, it clearly states that the children were allowed to play outside, completely unsupervised, and property was destroyed. She clearly stated that she was inside cleaning the kitchen and preparing for the next meal....that is NOT a two minute deal, and the children were left alone long enough to use a BASEBALL BAT to destroy property. My advice may have come off as harsh......I don't WANT to seem like a b****, but if that is what it takes to make a VERY important point about the need for close supervision, especially of children who are KNOWN to destroy things, and to hopefully help prevent a MAJOR injury (which very well could have happened with a BASEBALL BAT) then I guess I am a b****.

I agree- first post and added info made a big diff to me- reading: kids who have destroyed stairs before destroy a wooden fence w a bat! That doesn't bring to my mind a small, fragile stick woven fence.
Cleaning up vs running inside quick make me think of two totally diff frames-

So that was where I was coming from- and honestly Chrystal- I didn't find you harsh at all