DCP Who Is 4 Weeks In Now Says That Her 2yo Seems Sensitive To Gluten And Dairy

[trix23]

I'm going to send the Handbook home and require it to be read and signed if in agreement. If not, then they cannot return next week. Iam not afraid of a bully or her. The issues that have come up were new to me so I wanted the chance to see how I felt about them before commenting or making a policy. That's what a professional does.

If she badmouths me on social media and etc then that's her gig. But if I see any of it, I will be stating that she refused to provide special meals for her child with allergies and knowingly violated polices numerous times. I'm letting the chips fall where they land. Cause at this point, I'm fed up.

[nannyde]

What would you say at drop-off to ask? "Has he eaten yet?" Then if "no", say, "I'm sorry, but he needs to arrive fed" then shut the door? Lol. What if she lies?

Sigh. Last night for about 4 hours I had a killer migraine from all this.

when she texted and asked if he could eat at 9:30 did you reply with a no?

[trix23]

It was the hubby in a group text with her. In response, I said

"This is my policy on mealtimes. Waking up earlier would make time available to make a quick breakfast for him.

I would make a cashew butter rollup sandwich with dry cereal for DS if I was in a hurry. Maybe you could make something like that, he could eat on the way."

[trix23]

I also said (after they told me DCK wakes up at 8/8:15 and there isn't enough time to feed him and etc)

"Maybe need to wake him up a bit earlier. I remember I had to do that for Valen some days when he was going to a few different daycares.

So long as the meals are balanced and meet his dietary sensitivities, that's ok."

[hwichlaz]

When you term, do it in written form, email a copy to your licensing rep with a note that you expect a tantrum.

[nannyde]

I also said (after they told me DCK wakes up at 8/8:15 and there isn't enough time to feed him and etc)

"Maybe need to wake him up a bit earlier. I remember I had to do that for Valen some days when he was going to a few different daycares.

So long as the meals are balanced and meet his dietary sensitivities, that's ok."

I wouldn't ask if he ate. I would just accept him at the door and leave it. She's either going to say he ate, say she tried but he wouldn't eat, say he didn't eat, or wait and text you one of the above.

If she says he didn't eat then tell her that you can't accept him hungry. If she says she tried to eat and he wouldn't... say well he will be hungry at lunch... she may shoot back with "will you feed him if he gets hungry between?".. say that you will call her to come get him if he becomes hungry. If she says he has eaten and it was a problem... say "welcome to parenting".

Her excuse that he doesn't get up until so late isn't one she invented. Tell her that he just needs to get up earlier. It's just part of being a kid and going to school or daycare.

THERE'S NOTHING SPECIAL ABOUT HER DEAL. She just has to parent.

[trix23]

I find it's just easiest to just feed the kid at the next meal or snack time. That's in my handbook and I don't even comment on it.

[Blackcat31]

I find it's just easiest to just feed the kid at the next meal or snack time. That's in my handbook and I don't even comment on it.

Speaking of books.... I think you might be in need of this one https://www.amazon.com/Daycare-Whisp...ords=Tori+Fees

Seriously.....read it. Keep it handy, kind of like a user's manual.

You will learn quickly to recognize specific parent behavior patterns loooooong before they become an issue and most times when someone is able to be one step ahead you have the advantage.

I know the author and she knows her stuff so worth the $ hands down!!!!!!!!!!

[trix23]

I actually purchased this book about a year ago, . I might need to reread it but I definitely got a lot of my backbone from her policies and outlook on daycare

[hwichlaz]

I don't ask if a child ate...my policy is clear in my handbook.

If a parent mentions that a child might be a bit hungry, I just say....."Then I'll put a bit extra on his lunch plate." or "Lunch (next meal) is at XX:XX am/pm"

[Ariana]

I haven't heard of allergy testing being categorically inaccurate. Do you have any current research you have read to state this?

If he was on a special diet before entering daycare the provider should have been told before interviewing... on first phone call.

Agree that mom should have told the provider. Might be possible she didn't know.

One way a DR can determine if a child has an allergy is through elimination diet. We did a skin test for DD to determine if dairy was causing her hives, eczema, excessive vomitting, congestion and got negative results. The DR told us to eliminate dairy for 3 weeks to see if symptoms improved as the skin test is not always accurate. Luckily the symptoms improved so we remained dairy free. Had my child been in daycare at that time I would have had to ask my provider to accommodate the elimination diet.

http://acaai.org/allergies/allergy-treatment/allergy-testing/allergy-testing-children-and-infants

[Ariana]

I'm just not convinced the child has an allergy to gluten or milk.

What does she mean by oral reaction?

I would sit her down and say I need actual proof that he has an allergy or intolerance. I need testing results, testing date, and testing method used to determine allergy or "intolerance"

It really does not matter if you are convinced. She is asking for dietary considerations and as a provider you either provide it or don't. Oral reactions are swelling of the mouth, tongue or rash. Unfortunately most people think intolerances are fake.

This idea that the parents don't have time to make lunch is SO SO SO SO SO ridiculous. She is spending SO much time talking to you about food... use THAT time to make him lunch. Feed him breakfast before daycare, bring lunch and snack and be done with it.

I was simply giving an idea of why she might want the menu in advance. It is hard to meet all of the state dietary requirements as care providers and it takes a lot of planning so you expect a mom to do it over night?! I wanted to give the other side of this, as a mom with a kid with an intolerance who is just learning about it (if this was just learned about).

Stop the insanity. Until she provides ACTUAL PROOF that he has an allergy by way of ACTUAL testing then he is not considered disabled and is not covered by the disability act. You do not have to provide services based upon parents words.

Sometimes you cannot actually provide actual proof of a dietary intolerance or sensitivity. It often does not show up on allergy tests. Unfortunately you either take the parents word for it, adopt the new diet or terminate the parent.

[trix23]

If my child had an allergy or sensitivity to food and the provider was telling me I need to provide all meals I would either do that or find care somewhere else. I wouldn't fight them on it. I don't understand my parents think that they have a say in this matter. They enrolled with my program and agree to follow my policies and even in my hand book and my contract document it says this multiple times so there really should be no surprises.

[CityGarden]

Is this the same mom who you are terming today?

[Ariana]

If my child had an allergy or sensitivity to food and the provider was telling me I need to provide all meals I would either do that or find care somewhere else. I wouldn't fight them on it. I don't understand my parents think that they have a say in this matter. They enrolled with my program and agree to follow my policies and even in my hand book and my contract document it says this multiple times so there really should be no surprises.

Agree 100%!