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I don't know for sure, but maybe hurting your child and covering your butt by concocting a story to blame another, might fall under abuse?? She could feel free to hurt them again and just blame it on you, Grandma, Dad, Aunty, etc. I could be wrong ??? Just thinking outloud.
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Personally, I wasn't thinking abuse either, just that she accidentally poked him or whatever. Not sure I would report it other than to licensing.
I've accidentally scratched my kids or poked them in the eye accidentally.
I think mom freaked out thinking she would be accused of abuse and tried to blame youComment
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I didn't suspect any abuse in a DCBs situation either but was told to report it by several other people on here even though I KNOW he's not being abused. Lazy grandma? Sure! Abuse? No! But I had to CMA!
Not to mention this mom obviously has NO PROBLEM throwing you and your business under the bus. Even saying it out loud "this had to have happened at DC!" is just crazy.
I don't understand why she went to the ER first of all. Seriously. A scratch/welt? Emergent? And admitting she was being a "crazy mom" and then come to find out it was HER who scratched him?? Accident or not! The sequence of events AFTER that happened and then just accusing you 3+ hours after they left is just crazy. I wouldn't want that liability in my house. Like your licensor said, it's a good thing she came back today, but what happens next time? Is she going to accuse you again and then not bring them back? Then that "mom pokes him too hard and scratches him" line may be lost in the shuffle without actual reported documentation. Your licensor also knows how this line of business works. Parents say crazy things and do crazy things when they're scared or upset. Her "crazy mom" moves could cost you your license if she takes it far enough. For all you know she took pics, told the ER it happened at your daycare to cover her error and they're reporting it today to CPS and you are the suspect.Comment
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I only have a minute to address one of your comments...
My rep said that more than likely I WILL be reported by either the parents or the hospital, but not to worry. Basically all they do is come out and get my side of the story, talk to mom, and make a decision. My rep talked to the other rep in my county and they both agree that based on my information a complaint would be unfounded, but they would still have to go through the motions. On my public record it would say I received a complaint, but it won't say what the complaint is. CPS wouldn't be involved apparently because of how my state's daycare licensing does things.
From what I've seen these children are not abused. I would never report someone to CPS because their children said that mom's fingernail was too long and she ACCIDENTALLY scratched him. In my post above i quoted the dcb and he said it was an accident. He's also 4 and at snack time he told me that he had a baby sister but they got tired of her and stopped feeding her so she died. He told me that same story a few days ago, but it was a dog instead of a baby. I have to take what he says with a grain of salt.
Just like I don't like dcm assuming it happened here I would never automatically assume she's abusing her kids.
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Have you decided whether you'll keep the family?Comment
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This would have warranted a call to CPS from me. #1 because of the mom leaving marks on the child that were bad enough to warrant an ER visit, but mostly to cover my own butt. I'd have them come interview the kids at my home IMMEDIATELY. I truly doubt that CPS would find that Mom was abusive, BUT they would at least document the incident in case something happens in the future. And, Mom poking a kid in the chest (whose chest supposedly needs to be handled gently) isn't exactly "good mom" behavior, IMO.So I was changing dcb and I checked out his chest. It looks totally fine... MAYBE a little swollen on one side of the bone and then there's the scratch in the middle. I said "oh man, bud, how did you get this ouchie?" ... not really saying it to him, but just thinking out loud. He very clearly said "my mama hurt me" and then dcb4 said "yeah my mom poked him too hard"
the what did she do now?
So I asked "oh bummer, that stinks when that happens. How did she poke him too hard?"
Dcb4 says "she has too long fingernails and she accidentally poked him"
Ugh, I'm sick to my stomach now. I know you have to take what they say with a grain of salt which is why I didn't outright ask them in the first place, but they both said it was mom without me probing, kwim?Comment
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So OP did you ever talk to DCM about the heart condition she mentioned? Honestly this would freak me out bc either she's lying about it or she's omitted telling you very important health info. Either way it would rub me wrong and send up huge red flags for me.
I know you want that vacation but I think keeping this family might be really risky and end up being not worth it.Comment
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I would term simply for the lying. She tried to throw you under the bus and now you will have a written complaint on your record? What a puta. Especially with what dcb's said that mommy did it. She was still trying to lie to you instead of saying of you know we were rough housing and I accidentally scratched him. She is setting it up to take the fault from herself. (That's a red alert for me) I WOULD TERM.
Good luckhappyfaceComment
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I'm pretty sure I'm going to term, but I have to have at least one replacement first.
When I told her I wasn't happy that the chest thing was never mentioned she said that it's really not an issue until he's a teenager and then they'll have to break his sternum to give his heart and lungs enough room to grow. I'm not sure why they rushed him to the ER then this whole thing just confuses me :confused:
The money isn't what's making me want to keep them. Dcb3 has come a long way in three weeks... his bad behavior is almost non-existent and when he does try to use a tantrum to get his way I can end it pretty quickly.Comment
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Are you sure she actually took him to the ER. She might have just told you that so that you wouldn't question a scratch on his chest and report her. Honestly, what parent hasn't accidentally hurt there kid by scratching them, poking them, or bopping them somehow by mistake. Heck I wacked my 7 year old in the eye in the grocery store last week with a tub of butter after got behind me and I turned fast without knowing he was there and bopped him hard with the butter. She might have been reported previously for something so she was covering her butt at your expense.Comment
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Sounds like my poor daughter... She has played softball for years and his year is the first year she hasn't been hit in the head with a. Not so soft softball.. Why the heck they call them softballs anyway???
Last year her own daddy planted one right between her eyes on accident during catching practice.
Crap happens but who truly accidentally injure their child, rushes them to the ER and then blames someone else....
Moms whole recount is fishy IMHOComment
Me either
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