Spin Off From Parents Thread

[Country Kids]

Sorry BC, I was thinking there were more.

Wasn't there another one on prescription meds that had to be locked out and then the one on Sister Wives which everyone was wondering why it was locked out because it was actually staying civil.

Besides the polls that are done after a certain amount of time and trolls, if you count your two and the two above thats alot in my eyes for a short amount of time. It was just something I had thought of, not trying to create an argument, was stating a fact.

[Blackcat31]

Sorry BC, I was thinking there were more.

Wasn't there another one on prescription meds that had to be locked out and then the one on Sister Wives which everyone was wondering why it was locked out because it was actually staying civil.

Besides the polls that are done after a certain amount of time and trolls, if you count your two and the two above thats alot in my eyes for a short amount of time. It was just something I had thought of, not trying to create an argument, was stating a fact.

No worries

I didn't count the sister wife thread because it was actually a member of the forum trying to stir the pot.

I don't think that 2 is a lot.......remember a while back (around mid 2012 or even earlier) there were LOTs of locked threads and tons of drama.

Members got banned and things got heated......

So really if the dynamics of the forum are changing, I'd say they are changing to the good.

[littlemissmuffet]

I do not know who called anyone a name!

Imagine... all the work, safeguarding, worrying , arguments with appt. centers, arguing with relatives because they were not fingerprinted... paying double the charge for night repairs for 13 years because I was lied to or "misinformed" by licensing!
I just found this out today, so please stop saying I am causing problems! this is what I firmly believed and I am pretty upset! I am not against anyone here on this forum but I am close to leaving because I feel attacked!

YOU feel attacked? You managed to insult parents who don't allow their children to be transported by childcare providers, childcare providers who do not transport children, childcare providers (maybe even people in general) who use public transportation as means of getting around, childcare providers who allow people into their HOMES during daycare hours (including repairmen) and then basically called Crystal and others liars when they posted links to the regulations they felt you were misinformed about. And you feel attacked?

You have an air about you that you think you are better than everyone else... you wouldn't have been called on it so many times if it weren't so incredibly obvious and true.

I think you owe some people some SINCERE apologies without throwing in casual jabs about how great you are in comparison! And I definitely think you should reconsider your position as playing a victim in this thread.

[My3cents]

I answered in bold above.

One of this biggest things I read on this forum is providers who seem to feel that this profession should be respected and viewed as a "real" job by society yet, some providers feel that it should also be a job in which we should be given free passes to do things with our families and/or outside of care hours with little or no notice to families enrolled and expect parents to come pick up their children or change their work schedules to accommodate the things we want to do just because we are the bosses and/or the ones in charge.

I truly believe parents want reliability and dependability. Not a provider who simply closes every time her own children have something going on and then expects the parents they have enrolled should just have to "deal with it" and figure out back up.

Whether you close a little, a lot or not at all for family related things is fine and dandy but no matter how often you close, it is still something that should be discussed IN DEPTH with the families you enroll BEFORE they enroll so they (the families) know if they need to be flexible at their jobs or if you are going to be available to them on a regular basis.

Providers need to let families know if they will be closing on short notice frequently or if they will always give adequate notice.

I agree with this. Just as people that work outside of the home have issues they have to deal with, I feel we provide a service that we have to be accountable for. Parent's do not understand what it is like to be a provider- Why should they? It is not their job to do that. It is our job. I totally agree with BC on this.....

Sorry you were not able to make your child's game, but you were working! Our days are longer then the working parents- no ifs and or buts about this....we have to be here when they get here and here when they come back..... You want that type of flexibility, hire someone and make sure your parents know this from the get go-

I have the hardest time the last hour of daycare- guess what I would have a hard time the last hour of any job! Plan your life around your work or make it work- UGH!

[countrymom]

I read this whole thread.

when people from the same area are posting something totally different wouldn't you as a provider want to call you licensor and find out the truth before stirring the pot. Even if it was different in the end, you can say that in your county this is what we need to follow and be done with it. If I had to choose my kids over daycare, my kids would be here and the daycare would be closed. So I think there is more to it why your dd moved out.

second, this is funny, but Michelle if you brought your kids on an outing (as mentioned above) how did you transport those kids and why are kids around people who are not fingerprinted. I clearly think that you need to sit down and talk to your licensor, because I find it odd that you can't have a repair man over.

another thing that makes me mad, is what makes you better than me. You said it yourself, I spend time on my daycare too just like every one else. But I would never come on this board and tell people that I'm an awesome provider because I do everything by the book. Thats like slapping each and every one of us in the face because we don't spend enough time on our daycare. Just because we all have different opinions on things doesn't make us bad providers.

really I like heated debates they don't last long and sometimes it feels so good to have a good argument (just like a good cry) its hard when your home by yourself all day and need to destress !

[Michelle]

AGAIN: when people talk about themselves, their lives, their business...they use the words"I do it this way or I do it that way"
Even Black cat said.." I don't need baby gear because "MY KIDS ARE WELL TRAINED"
Ok , now is that snarky? or rude? or I'm better than you sounding?
If I were to say that, then all of black cats friends would be all over me.. but she gets away with it. so, let's stop the Cliques and let everyone talk without worrying about how they will be treated.

This issue has been resolved but people want to keep adding to the drama.

It's not like I was saying" well licensing said I can keep a loaded shotgun on my kitchen table" My goodness!!! I was defending what I was told, I was told wrong at least 10 times by licensing...Why would I put myself through this if I wasn't positive about it?

Let's just move on ok?

[Blackcat31]

AGAIN: when people talk about themselves, their lives, their business...they use the words"I do it this way or I do it that way"
Even Black cat said.." I don't need baby gear because "MY KIDS ARE WELL TRAINED"
Ok , now is that snarky? or rude? or I'm better than you sounding?
If I were to say that, then all of black cats friends would be all over me.. but she gets away with it. so, let's stop the Cliques and let everyone talk without worrying about how they will be treated.

This issue has been resolved but people want to keep adding to the drama.

It's not like I was saying" well licensing said I can keep a loaded shotgun on my kitchen table" My goodness!!! I was defending what I was told, I was told wrong at least 10 times by licensing...Why would I put myself through this if I wasn't positive about it?

Let's just move on ok?

NOT sure why you are now dragging me into this but if MY comment offended you, say so and I will gladly apologize for it...as I didn't mean it to sound that way.

You are now implying that I have some sort of "clique" going on here and will have my "friends" get on you about things if you say something....

WHERE is this coming from???? and why can't you simply admit that you WERE offensive to some members and apologize for it......whether you meant it that way or not.

Good grief.....I am sorry you feel as though you can't say what you mean or find the right words but it still doesn't change the fact that you said a few things that WERE offensive and people called you out on it.

Now, you are trying to make this about me.....good grief.

Did you NOT even read what I wrote to you in your apology thread?????????

I can see why Crystal has chosen to leave this forum now.

[countrymom]

sorry but I'm in no clique, and I march to my own drum. I call it as I see it.

black cat, can I be in your clique !!

[Michelle]

NOT sure why you are now dragging me into this but if MY comment offended you, say so and I will gladly apologize for it...as I didn't mean it to sound that way.

You are now implying that I have some sort of "clique" going on here and will have my "friends" get on you about things if you say something....

WHERE is this coming from???? and why can't you simply admit that you WERE offensive to some members and apologize for it......whether you meant it that way or not.

Good grief.....I am sorry you feel as though you can't say what you mean or find the right words but it still doesn't change the fact that you said a few things that WERE offensive and people called you out on it.

Now, you are trying to make this about me.....good grief.

Did you NOT even read what I wrote to you in your apology thread?????????

I can see why Crystal has chosen to leave this forum now.

I was using it as an example of how some people can say what ever they want to and some people can't... when i first read it... I let it go because that is how I am!
as far as my daughter goes... we had our biggest disagreements about the "no friend here" and at that time I was a 24 hour daycare..
She now lives right next door ( we own 3 houses) and she is here all the time, eating, talkin non stop and she is my best assistant and now 2 of her friends are fingerprinted and are my assistants too. her friends that are not ... visit her at home

[Blackcat31]

I was using it as an example of how some people can say what ever they want to and some people can't... when i first read it... I let it go because that is how I am!

IN post #240 I said: "I KNOW I have been offensive to others and said things I shouldn't have and if/when it is brought to my attention, I will absolutely apologize if I hurt someone's feelings but I won't make excuses and simply continue offending them."

Which clearly states I will gladly apologize IF it is brought to my attention.

If you were offended by something I said and chose to let it go and not say something about it, then that's on YOU!!!

There is NO way I can apologize for something I don't know I did. :confused:

THAT is the difference. I didn't know I offended you but others were VERY open about the fact that you DID offend them and stated it several times in the thread.

You did apologize (I think) but did so in a private thread where NOT everyone who was part of this thread had access to read or see.

Your comments implying there is some sort of clique here is absolutely insulting and unnecessary!!!!

The comment "some people can say what ever they want to and some people can't" is also IMHO, a ridiculous statement and again HIGHLY offensive.

This is a public forum and people can say whatever they want but one thing they should do is take PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY for what they say and own up to it.

I have offended LOTS of people here and never on purpose and certainly not with the intention of hurting or belittling them.

I have owned my actions and words and apologized if I did any of those things.

I owned my actions WITHOUT excuses.

...and for what it's worth....I don't have a clique. I am a ONE woman show and prefer to work alone!!

[Crystal]

The difference between you and BC is that she doesn’t make it personal. In this thread alone you have:

Offended providers, insinuating that those who do not do field trips are doing the children a disservice in this post:

This is one of the things that family daycare is all about.
If you don't want your child apart of a wonderful family and to be treated like a unique and special part of someones family.. then get a nanny or put them in a cookie cutter center.. at the center , they will get their diapers changed, be fed, and come home with crafts but I have seen the sad look in kids eyes that come from these type of places... but they won't transport your kid and you can rest assured he will not be in a car crash.

Offending those who use bus service to take children on trips, implying that they are putting children in danger and also implying that you are better because you don’t in this post:

Side note... I would NEVER take my dck's on a city bus... I would not take my own kids on one. We are suppose to keep our kids from potential child abusers and you don't know who is on that bus.. they are not seat belted in,also being on the bus doesn't "magically" make other drivers drive better... The no seat belts and car seats scare me the most..also.

Implying that another provider, who provided you with FACTS, is lying in this post:

Absolutely not true and very dangerous information..
I would never allow a repairman in my home with the kids present!

When asked by that provider if you were implying she was lying, implied that she was “misinformed” even though she posted the FACTS for you in this post:

Originally Posted by Crystal
Are you calling me a liar?
no, just misinformed

Implied that two members just willy-nilly let people hang out randomly and that you are above them/that in this post:

So, yes I would rather follow the rules to the letter than to say to a licenser..." well Bubba is here to fix my sink because Nan's toilet exploded everywhere and she did it! "or Crystal says I can have an array of people here around these kids because she said "as long as it is for a good reason"

Nope, not going to happen! I would not do that to these kids, my own daughter, or my business!

Implied that providers who do not take children on field trips are incapable of doing so in this post:

we are just really good at what we do.. it's no hassle at all for me..

Talked “down” to a provider in this post, in response to her saying THANK YOU for your response:

why are you happy?
This is terrible news for children in daycare.
This means any family daycare provider can just invite whoever they want over and hang out... not everyone is as careful as we are.
This should be very sad news for you, Crystal

And were argumentative THROUGHOUT the thread, even when it was proven to you that you were the one who was "misinformed"

I will tell you why BlackCat has a "following" around here. She is polite, considerate, thoughtful with her posting, and, when she is wrong, she OWNS it. She doesn't get defensive and argue every little thing, she doesn't offend and insult other members.

So, hey, if she has a clique, can I get an invite?

[Michelle]

I am choosing to not post anymore on this thread:

I have better things to do
I have beautiful children to take care of
I have 6 of my own children that need my attention, energy, and good mood
I have a lot to look forward to
My baby will be coming home from Kuwait in 4 weeks.(hopefully)
He is taking me to Hawaii and I have to protect myself now from any negative people trying to bring me down and make me feel bad about myself
When enough people tell you that you are a bad person.. you start to believe it and I am so tired of this... I think I deserve better
Thank you to all my true friends that pm me in support!

I will post on other threads
lovethislovethis

[Unregistered]

Wow....so dramatic. Seriously? People are telling you that YOU are bad person?
You still cannot figure out what YOU said that made people feel like you were telling them THEY were BAD?

Okay, whatever.

Have a great day

[Blackcat31]

I am choosing to not post anymore on this thread:

I have to protect myself now from any negative people trying to bring me down and make me feel bad about myselfWhen enough people tell you that you are a bad person.. you start to believe it and I am so tired of this... I think I deserve better
Thank you to all my true friends that pm me in support!

Are you for real?!?!?

YOU insult me and then try to turn it around and say I am negative and trying to bring you down?!?!!?!?

You've got a lot of nerve!?!?!?

I guess that means I won't be allowed to be in your clique of "real friends".

Oh, well. I am DONE trying to be supportive to you.

[sharlan]

IMHO, it is time to lock this thread and call it over.