My Mom Does Not Like You....

[Unregistered]

So I have a DCF that I have had some issues with. They have been with me for over a year, but seem to think that my rules don't apply to them. I have a strong backbone and always put my foot down, which always results in a huge argument with the DCM. It has only happened two times since they have been here, so I have chose to deal with it.

Well this morning DCK comes in and says, My mom does not like you and I won't be coming here anymore, I am going to go to a new preschool with big kids.

The DCK said something similar to this last week too, but I ignored it.


Would you say something to this DCP? I am really shocked that this child would say this, as they are usually very sweet and never say things to this degree.



Advice Please.................

[mrs b]

I had a kid say that and sure enough when I asked the parents about it they said they had been looking into other daycares. The child repeated what she had heard word for word!

[daycarediva]

I had a kid say that and sure enough when I asked the parents about it they said they had been looking into other daycares. The child repeated what she had heard word for word!

It happened to me last summer when a dcf went with a large preschool in the area. DCG was very excited to tell me about her new school. Based purely on what dcg said I even knew which preschool it was. LOL!

I was vinidicated when Mom called 4 weeks after leaving wanting to come back. ::

I would ask dcm at pickup!

[Unregistered]

so do I say something

So if you would say something to this DCM, what would you say???

[not registered]

so what would you say?

So if you think that I should say something, what should I say?

I a pretty upset about the My mom does not like you comment, but should I even mention that the kid said this???

[Unregistered]

I would say "YAAAAAY!! Don't let the door hit ya on the way out!"

[e.j.]

I would definitely say something at pick up today. That way, the parent can confirm or deny what the child said to you and you can either relax or start to look for someone to take their place. It could be that the parents are looking into preschools for the fall and not planning to leave any time soon. Kids don't always understand time frames involved.

If it is true that mom "doesn't like you" and they are planning to leave, it might also give you a chance to talk things out and either turn things around if you want to or to at least part ways on a more positive note.

[Unregistered]

what to say

so if you would say something? would you say something about everything the kid said or just ask if they are leaving??

[MyAngels]

I would probably say something along the lines of: "DCK may have misunderstood something they overheard, but they have related that you are not happy with my services and will be leaving soon - is that the case? I'd like to start advertising if so."

Either that, or, "Don't let the door hit ya' where the good Lord split ya'." JK. Sort of. ::

[bunnyslippers]

This happened to me recently. I made an off the cuff comment to the parnets when they picked up. Turns out, the mom was talking about preschool when she was older. As far as the "My mom doesn't like you" comment...I would flat out say ,"so, she says you don't like me and she is going to a new school?"

Awkward, but turns the tables on mom. Good luck.

[hgonzalez]

It would be awkward, but I would definitley ask or you are going to keep worrying about it.

I would say '**** has mentioned that she is going to be going to be going to a different daycare/preschool. I don't want you to be upset with her for telling me, but I would like to know if you are not planning on continuing in my daycare for much longer.'

You could also add 'is there something we can work on together so you can continue to come here for daycare, or are you already making plans to leave?'

Then ask for their timeline.

I actually have had to do this a couple of times. Awkward. One time they were not leaving and the kid was full of baloney (stayed on 2 more years until they went to school fulltime). And the other time, it was spot on.
This last time, the little girl kept coming here and crying. I knew something was up because she does not do that. She would not tell me anything, but kept crying and staying away from the other kids. We have been having BIG issues with her brother here, so I guessed and I was right.

[Blackcat31]

Just out of curiousity, what bothers you....the fact that they might be leaving your care or that the DCM doesn't like you?

I wouldn't ask her either question.

I have heard so many things from kids over the years that I rarely believe them until it either happens or the parent tells me themselves.

Honestly, it doesn't really sound like you like this mom all that much so really what difference does it make if she likes you or doesn't? You aren't friends. You are a service provider and she purchases your services. If she is your friend, well then you need to re-think your friendships as it isn't very cool that she argues your policies with you.

Secondly, if you have a contract and require parents to give written notice, then you will find out if they are leaving when they give you notice.

If you ask, IMHO it just comes across as needy and insecure.

[JenNJ]

I would start advertising and interviewing now. When you find a fit, ask DCM flat out. Read her and decide what to do.

[Unregistered]

Just out of curiousity, what bothers you....the fact that they might be leaving your care or that the DCM doesn't like you?

I wouldn't ask her either question.

I have heard so many things from kids over the years that I rarely believe them until it either happens or the parent tells me themselves.

Honestly, it doesn't really sound like you like this mom all that much so really what difference does it make if she likes you or doesn't? You aren't friends. You are a service provider and she purchases your services. If she is your friend, well then you need to re-think your friendships as it isn't very cool that she argues your policies with you.

Secondly, if you have a contract and require parents to give written notice, then you will find out if they are leaving when they give you notice.

If you ask, IMHO it just comes across as needy and insecure.

I guess I did not look at it this way. NO DCM is not my friend, but she has been a very nice person to me and I guess no one wants to be disliked no matter our age.

The only reason that I want to maybe say something, is becuase the kid keeps going on and on about it and saying how much his family does not like me, my house ****s and so on and so on.. I know it is coming from a 3.5 year old, but it still hurts. this kid does not make things up, so I know that there is some truth in it. The last thing that I want is little susie and johnny going home repeating what this DCK is saying.....

[MamaG]

I'd flat out replace her! Don't say a word, just start advertising and interviewing. If you find a good fit give the pia dcm her notice and move on with life. She isn't worth it.