Is it Common For Parents to Vacation Without Children?

[judytrickett]

Judy, how do we get misinterrupted so easily? Wow!

Because most people have fragile egos. They care about other people's opinions of them and therefore assume, wrongly most of the time, that any comment is therefore directed at them. Then they get defensive.

Just do what is RIGHT and FAIR to others, speak your mind and stop worrying about what other people think of you. Life is soooo much easier that way!

[MN Mom]

So question to you ladies: Do you have parents who take their kids out of day care for one full week and go somewhere or do something as a family WITH their kids where the parents are caring for the kids wall to wall for a week straight?

I did not have my dckids from July 2nd until July 19th. The parents took 2 weeks off to spend with their kids. They went on a 5 day trip out of state for the 4th of July, and spent the rest of the time at home with them. It was nice!

[nannyde]

I did not have my dckids from July 2nd until July 19th. The parents took 2 weeks off to spend with their kids. They went on a 5 day trip out of state for the 4th of July, and spent the rest of the time at home with them. It was nice!

Was this unpaid time or paid time? Was this one family and did you have other kids during that time?

[judytrickett]

Was this unpaid time or paid time? Was this one family and did you have other kids during that time?

Yeah, I was wondering the same thing.

[Daycare Mommy]

Yes, I believe it would be selfish for a daycare parent who already has their child in daycare 50 hrs a week to go on vacation and not take their children. Now if the kids are having their own "vacation" with grandma (this means g-ma is NOT dropping them at daycare at all) then it's not so bad.. For kids, daycare is the equivalent of their work. The kids deserve that break every bit as much as the parents do.

Now this part is me personally.. I wouldn't go without them. We take our kids with us pretty much everywhere and can't imagine planning a vacation without including them in it. The way we see it, they won't be children forever. We take every opportunity we have to create wonderful childhood memories for them. There'll be plenty of "me" time later. In the mean time, my husband and I content ourselves with 3-4 out of the house date nights a year. After the kids are already asleep g-ma comes over for a few hours so we can have dinner and a movie. Even at the end of our date nights we are eager to get back to them. At this point in life we don't feel the need for any more time away from them than that.

[emosks]

Sadly, yes, it is becoming the norm.

Should it be the "norm"? NO!

Is the "norm" always the "right"? NO!

Do their kids pick up on this? YES!

Will their kids grow up to understand that their parents really didn't want to spend time with them? YES!

Is this selfish parenting? ABSOLUTELY!

Am I judgemental? YOU BETCHA! ((but someone needs to speak up for those little people who can't while mommy and daddy ligag off to Lord knows what after dumping them in daycare all day))

Really? I'm sorry but the last line just really gets to me!!! If I want to take a day off of work to go do a day trip with my husband without the kids...I sure as heck will! When I had my son in daycare I didn't "DUMP" him there to "LOLLIGAG" all day. I sent him to daycare 1 day a week when I was a SAHM with another young baby at home. It was something I wanted to do for him.

Every year my husband and I go away in October for 4 days alone. **GASP**. The kids stay in my daycare and my MIL watches them for us while we are gone outside of daycare hours.

For those of you that are so proud of never leaving your children what are you going to do when it's time for school? I've been on both sides of the fence. A mom that worked almost 50-60 hours a week with kids in daycare and now a mom that is still working 50-60 hours a week running a daycare.

I am appalled by some of the comments providers here make about parents. Absolutely appalled. Sometimes it leaves me speechless. You never know why a parent is taking a day off or even week. It might rekindle the marriage so you aren't dealing with single parents in the future. Think about that.

[judytrickett]

For those of you that are so proud of never leaving your children what are you going to do when it's time for school?

My kids homeschool.

I am appalled by some of the comments providers here make about parents. Absolutely appalled. Sometimes it leaves me speechless. You never know why a parent is taking a day off or even week. It might rekindle the marriage so you aren't dealing with single parents in the future. Think about that.

Uh-huh..... Every situation, every parent is the exception. That is what's wrong with society these days - everyone thinks THEY are the exception.

I would bet my last dollar in the bank that the parents I have in care who have 8 weeks a year off are spending EVERY day alone with their kids in daycare because they are attending a very important non-work appointment or "working on their marriage". Uh-huh....yep...sure......

I'm not surprised that you are "appalled" by my, and many of the other poster's comments. The truth, once spoken, is rarely popular.

[MN Mom]

Was this unpaid time or paid time? Was this one family and did you have other kids during that time?

I only have this one family. It was unpaid time. They only pay for the days they are here. I do not have a contract.

This family is not from the U.S. originally. They are very much into family values. Their children go with them everywhere.

I took 2 of the 3 last Saturday night (overnight, unpaid) so mom and dad could have some "alone" time. They were all smiles when they picked their kids up Sunday morning. I treat this family like extended family, and it shows with unexpected bonuses, flexible hours, and lots of appreciation.

Don't get me wrong, their kids aren't perfect (see previous posts on eating issues). However, for the most part, the kids mind well and the parents mind well too!

[emosks]

My kids homeschool.



Uh-huh..... Every situation, every parent is the exception. That is what's wrong with society these days - everyone thinks THEY are the exception.

I would bet my last dollar in the bank that the parents I have in care who have 8 weeks a year off are spending EVERY day alone with their kids in daycare because they are attending a very important non-work appointment or "working on their marriage". Uh-huh....yep...sure......

I'm not surprised that you are "appalled" by my, and many of the other poster's comments. The truth, once spoken, is rarely popular.

It sounds to me like most of you who do talk about parents like this need to find a new profession...or new families. I guess we are just so blessed to have such awesome families that are nothing like what you all describe.

I forget....you and a few others on the board are always right! DUH! What was I thinking?

[judytrickett]

I forget....you and a few others on the board are always right! DUH! What was I thinking?

It's not about being right. It's about being able to hold your own and back up your opinion. Can you do that??? Where are you articles to prove your point that kids that spend NO time with thier parents are as well adjusted as kids that do?

Huh? Where is that info??

"We" who feel this way have posted our info before. Go and search professionalmom's posts. She has a degree in criminology and has posted in the past very concrete articles and information on the affects of non-parental quality involvement on children. It's all there in black and white.

It's very easy for you to come on and dismiss our views by using a cop-out insinuating we are always right because we collectively push our point. That is you playing the victim because YOUR point is not being taken up by many others. Well, go find some research and come back. Do the work to prove your point and you might find people will change their minds.

[emosks]

It's not about being right. It's about being able to hold your own and back up your opinion. Can you do that??? Where are you articles to prove your point that kids that spend NO time with thier parents are as well adjusted as kids that do?

Huh? Where is that info??

"We" who feel this way have posted our info before. Go and search professionalmom's posts. She has a degree in criminology and has posted in the past very concrete articles and information on the affects of non-parental quality involvement on children. It's all there in black and white.

It's very easy for you to come on and dismiss our views by using a cop-out insinuating we are always right because we collectively push our point. That is you playing the victim because YOUR point is not being taken up by many others. Well, go find some research and come back. Do the work to prove your point and you might find people will change their minds.

Back off! I just was saying that there is nothing wrong with people who want to take a vacation from their children! Who the heck are you to treat me like this? You have your opinion...I have mine. I never claimed to have any research. The original part of this post was about vacationing without kids before you and PM got off on a tangent on how we are wrong for doing so.

[judytrickett]

Back off! I just was saying that there is nothing wrong with people who want to take a vacation from their children! Who the heck are you to treat me like this? You have your opinion...I have mine. I never claimed to have any research. The original part of this post was about vacationing without kids before you and PM got off on a tangent on how we are wrong for doing so.

Okay, so no research then. Gotcha!

[emosks]

Okay, so no research then. Gotcha!

Exactly what are you trying to prove here?

[judytrickett]

Exactly what are you trying to prove here?

What I am trying to prove (your words, not mine) is that we were having a very NON-personal discussion about children and their never getting to spend time with their parents and have a break from daycare.

And then you came and made it personal about YOU. It wasn't about YOU. YOU made it that way.

BTW...if you have also noticed that up and until this point both myself and all the other poster have been polite and cordial. You decided not to be.

Just show the research. You are certainly entitled to your opinion. You have that right. Just back it up. I'm always willing to learn and understand a different view point. But I need more info than just your personal history.

You are getting all riled up for no reason.

[emosks]

What I am trying to prove (your words, not mine) is that we were having a very NON-personal discussion about children and their never getting to spend time with their parents and have a break from daycare.

And then you came and made it personal about YOU. It wasn't about YOU. YOU made it that way.

BTW...if you have also noticed that up and until this point both myself and all the other poster have been polite and cordial. You decided not to be.

Just show the research. You are certainly entitled to your opinion. You have that right. Just back it up. I'm always willing to learn and understand a different view point. But I need more info than just your personal history.

You are getting all riled up for no reason.

I never made this about me. You read it that way. Did I use one example of myself going on vacation without kids once a year? Yep. We also had a family go to Mexico for 12 days without their daughter in May. Did we look and frown on them for doing so? Nope! Have we had moms send their kids an extra day every once in a while so they can go pamper themselves on their day off? Yep! Did we come complain here to the world about it? Nope. They pay us to take care of their children. To teach them. To nurture them. To love them like they are our own. And that my friend is what we do. We love our job.

Where was I not cordial? Please, oh please point that out. And honey...this isn't riled up. You don't know me so please don't act like you do.