Misdirected Email

[Play Care]

I agree with Spedmommy. The former client never mentioned you by name.
It just so happened the child dropped your name, and the provide put it together.

That's not slander or libel. It's not even enough for other people to be afraid of using your services since most would have no idea who you are.

It would be one thing if she were going on all the day care sites and giving you horrible reviews, or taking down your ads, etc.

All she's done is make herself look petty and vindictive.

Obviously you can choose to handle it as you wish, but I feel that in sending her anything it will just add to the drama.

[Blackcat31]

I agree with Spedmommy. The former client never mentioned you by name.
It just so happened the child dropped your name, and the provide put it together.

That's not slander or libel. It's not even enough for other people to be afraid of using your services since most would have no idea who you are.

It would be one thing if she were going on all the day care sites and giving you horrible reviews, or taking down your ads, etc.

All she's done is make herself look petty and vindictive.

Obviously you can choose to handle it as you wish, but I feel that in sending her anything it will just add to the drama.

Which is EXACTLY what certain types of clients live for.

[Tasha]

I want the drama to end because I am sick to death of thinking about her, but I so badly want her to know that I know what she's been saying about me.
(And btw, it is slander (but not libel, which is why I put it in parentheses), because while she did not identify me by name, she did identify me as her previous provider, and she did make false statements about me that are damaging to my reputation.) Regardless, I am going to let the matter drop unless I hear of her badmouthing me anymore.

[Annalee]

I want the drama to end because I am sick to death of thinking about her, but I so badly want her to know that I know what she's been saying about me.
(And btw, it is slander (but not libel, which is why I put it in parentheses), because while she did not identify me by name, she did identify me as her previous provider, and she did make false statements about me that are damaging to my reputation.) Regardless, I am going to let the matter drop unless I hear of her badmouthing me anymore.

She probably knows you know she is saying all that stuff. The parent I had stopped one of my then current clients in walmart. I now have that Walmart client's grandchild.:: True clients know the truth and the same goes for the community. They will figure it out and if they don't, you don't need them anyway!

[Blackcat31]

[Ariana]

You will never regret handling yourself with dignity and class

[KidGrind]

I think a few more things need to be taken into consideration here:

In rereading the post, the dcm didn't say Tasha's name, the little one did. Tasha and the other provider were only able to figure it out because they knew each other and the little boy said Tasha's name.

Yes, it's infuriating that dcm is talking trash but, if dcm isn't using Tasha's name directly, there wouldn't be anything Tasha could legally do. And, if Tasha writes a letter to dcm, it could make dcm mad enough to escalate the situation to Yelp reviews. Just my two cents but, in your shoes, I would leave it alone . . .

Thank you for writing this, I misread!!! I thought the mother mentioned the provider’s name not the child.

If the mother didn’t say your name, I wouldn’t reach out to her. Let her tell her tall tales, most providers will know there is a different side to that story.

[Tasha]

Talked to my friend.

And I feel a lot better. DCM called her to ask if/when they could start and my friend turned her down. She flat-out told her that I was a friend of hers, and that she knew she was lying. She also told her, "I'm going to give you a piece of advice,'' that it was going to be hard to find a provider if she continues to trash her previous one, that it sends up a big red flag.
I am very grateful to my friend. She said she wasn't going to take her anyway because the hours weren't a good fit, but I still appreciate the way she handled it.
She also told me exactly how my name came up during the interview. She asked DCM why she was leaving her provider, and DCM started saying ''she'' and the DCB said, ''I go to Miss Tasha.'' And DCM said, yes honey, you used to go there.

[Nurse Jackie]

I'm sorry you had to go through this. While reading this thread I thought I was watching a soap opera. In the end I'm glad things turned out in your favor. I bet she's emailing someone right now talking about how she knows you really have a smug look on your face now. Hopefully she sends this email to the right recipient ::

[Josiegirl]

You will never regret handling yourself with dignity and class

I love that! So many times I wish I had used that.

[Josiegirl]

Oh Tasha, I am SO glad your friend said that to her!!! She needs to receive a gift of chocolate!
I was completely on the fence of how I would handle something like that. I would have wanted to give dcm a piece of my mind and thought your original letter was exactly what I'd want to do but knew being the bigger person was probably the route to go. I'm really glad it worked out the way it did for you! Did your friend tell you what dcm's reaction was? Oh to be the fly on the wall....

[lovemykidstoo]

And I feel a lot better. DCM called her to ask if/when they could start and my friend turned her down. She flat-out told her that I was a friend of hers, and that she knew she was lying. She also told her, "I'm going to give you a piece of advice,'' that it was going to be hard to find a provider if she continues to trash her previous one, that it sends up a big red flag.
I am very grateful to my friend. She said she wasn't going to take her anyway because the hours weren't a good fit, but I still appreciate the way she handled it.
She also told me exactly how my name came up during the interview. She asked DCM why she was leaving her provider, and DCM started saying ''she'' and the DCB said, ''I go to Miss Tasha.'' And DCM said, yes honey, you used to go there.

That is perfect. What did she say I wonder?

[Thriftylady]

I am so glad your friend handled this in this way! I agree send her some chocolates or flowers or something for not being afraid to speak the truth!

[Rockgirl]

That is a good friend you have!

[spedmommy4]

Honestly, I think that dcm needed to hear that from another person. And I am betting the experience dcm just had with your provider friend was both eye opening (in terms of how small the childcare community is) and humbling. She will either take it to heart and learn from her mistakes at this point or she is going to continue have a hard time finding home based childcare.