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I am a registered user but logged out because I have parents on this site. I have had a child for about a month now. Yesterday, the child brought a toy into my home, which I think was a disguise for some sort of recording device. I run a legal, reputable daycare with a very strong program, and I am an excellent provider. I have nothing to hide, and really wouldn't care if I were taped or video recorded, but the thought that a parent would try to secretly record me bothers me. It tells me that they do not trust me, and I do not want to be in a business relationship under those circumstances. Should I confront the parents or leave it alone?
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what makes you think that it's a disguise for a recording device?Hee hee! Look, I have a signature! -
I would take the recording device and record my immediate termination speech to them onto it and then send it home with them.
But that's just me.
I would be livid!!!!
NOT because I had anything to hide, but because in this business trust and honestly are absolutely vital to have a good working relationship.
Secretly taping me would violate those two things in everyway!
Last edited by Michael; 10-19-2012, 12:58 PM.Comment
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There was a hard device sewn into the doll, and it was very unusual. The doll wasn't one of those talking dolls that cries or does anything whatsoever. It was very odd. Also, ever since this family started I always get this strange vibe from them, like they don't trust me and analyze everything I say. I commented the other day that the child does well eating carrots, and the next time they came the mom made a comment that she was up all night trying to figure out what I meant by saying that the child does well eating carrots. Its so odd! I didn't want to take this family on but needed the money. Something didn't sit right with me even during the interview. The mom made a point also the other day saying she always quizzes the child on what we do during the day. The child is almost 2. It's just weird. I wish I had recorded a termination notice!!! I should have posted this yesterday!Last edited by Michael; 10-19-2012, 12:59 PM.Comment
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I think the doll would accidentally fall in the dishwater.Comment
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I would confront them on it the second they walked through my door this morning.
And, if I felt as uncomfortable with them as you describe, I simply could not work with them and would have to end the relationship immediately.
Good luck.
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Tom Copeland wrote about this very subject: http://www.tomcopelandblog.com/2012/...tapes-you.htmlComment
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I would open up the toy if I could to prove it was a recording device, and if so call the parents out on it. We are in a profession where there has to be trust, and if either of the parties are lacking in it, there is no point in continuing the relationship as little things like this will continue to pop up. I would tell them that you are hurt that they do not trust you, but am appalled that they would try to bring a recording into your private home to record you. That's just crossing the line. I would terminate them on the spot! It's one thing for them to want to come and sit in for a few hours to see what is going on if they have concerns, but to be devious and record you is obsurd!Comment
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Absolutely agree. If you can prove it, its grounds for immediate termination. If they really don't trust you then there is no reason for their child to be in your care, whether the lack of trust is justified or not. If you keep this family you're likely to experience this kind of thing again, or worse.. false accusations.Comment
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I have in my policies that any toy/item brought from home will be considered a donation to my daycare.
Then I would immediately investigate the item and confront the parent at pickup if it was indeed a recording device. Termination would follow, no amount of money is worth the aggravation and lack of trust that an invasion of privacy would bring.I see little people.Comment
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I absolutely would have opened it up. They may think you are insane if you bring it up and its just a battery pack or something silly like that. Without proof I wouldn't mention it but I would term a family if I felt there was a lack of trust on either end.Comment
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Honestly, I wouldn't do anything unless you know FOR SURE there was a recording device. Lots of toys have those boxes, maybe it wasn't a talking toy but a vibrating toy or something. If there was not a recording device and you accuse them of it you'll come across as paranoid and crazy.
If however you find out that there was a recording device I would terminate. This is a business in your home and it is unfair and a violation of privacy to bring that in without a notice (possibly even illegal in some states.)Comment
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If I suspected a recording device, that toy would have been opened up and investigated 10 minutes ago.
If it was a recording device, the termination would have been immediate. As in a phone call to work for the parent to pick up the child NOW. Reason: Lack of trust and non-existent working relationship.
I can't put into words how angry I would be.Comment
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Sounds to me like DCM is fishing for a reason to prove to her DH that she should be at home with her DD...IMO.
I think a lot of DCM's really resent their DP because they want to be at home with their child but finances sometimes doesn't allow for them to do that or DH does not agree that Mom should stay at home.
I did this when I went back to work after my ODD was born.... Not to the point of sending a recording device to the babysitter though! I would just complain about every little thing to my DH (but never to the DP) until one day he finally agreed that it would be better if I was home with DD happyface
I think if she needed to go that far with it, it means she has not been able to find any dirt on you and she is digging REALLY deep.
If DCF makes you uncomfortable and you can afford to, I would term. The thought of being spied on like that would send me over the edge. Imagine the $$ they must have spent on that if it was actually a recording device!Comment
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