What Would You Do?

[SandeeAR]

If he was a good baby for you before, I would give it some time. I'm with the others, sounds like something happened to him, or around him at the other daycare.

I would give the Mom a 30 day written notice, that you must see a great deal of improvement in that time. Then you will re-evaluate the situation. If there is enough improvement for you, then you will extend to another 30 days. If not enough improvement, you will term immediately.

Tell her she has to do her part to improve the situation. She has to work on things at home too, if she wants him to be able to stay.

Just remember, she has already lied to you once. A big lie! So be sure you want to continue to deal with her in the future, before you make this offer. If not, then term now. Reason, you were lied to.

[MamaBear]

Thanks all so much for your advice. I talked to the mom yesterday and told her again how bad the separation anxiety is and how disruptive it is through the day. She pretty much acted like it was no big deal until I said that if it doesn't improve during my trial period then it wouldn't work out. That perked up her ears. She was surprised that he'd have do a new trial period... but its a new contract so duhhhh. I have a 2 week trial period. He's been coming about a week now... started last Thursday but I'm closed today for my 2 son's first day of school... so I would let it roll into next week to make it fair.

She said she would bring a "comfort" toy for him and hopes that will work to soothe him. I know it wont. He still will cry. But I agreed to try it to be fair.

He was a somewhat easy baby before he left here. He didnt cry like this at drop offs and when others came. He was just a goofy silly boy who'd either play, sleep or eat. But he also had his older sister here back then too. Shes since gone off to preschool and so that might be another part of his freaking out. No mom and no sister and so hes all crazed.

I think I'm more frustrated that she lied about how he is than anything. Even when I told her that he only sleeps 30 minutes a day, she says "oh yea thats what hes doing lately". So I was like "I thought you said he was a great napper now"... she looked all confused like she forgot her lie. So that bugs me more than anything and I feel the need to end it.

We'll see how it goes in the next week. I'll let you guys know!

[Zoe]

Funny how she doesn't even remember her own lie. I'm glad you confronted her about that. Hopefully the child will calm down for you!

[MamaBear]

Funny how she doesn't even remember her own lie. I'm glad you confronted her about that. Hopefully the child will calm down for you!

Yeah this mom was infamous for lying to me about itty bitty things and big things and then not remembering her lie. Why or why did I even take her back. Blech!

[Blackcat31]

Yeah this mom was infamous for lying to me about itty bitty things and big things and then not remembering her lie. Why or why did I even take her back. Blech!

I don't normally advise people to just term, but in this scenario, I could sense that you had already decided that was the best option and needed someone to say it was okay to do so without feeling guilty about not sticking it out longer etc as others have suggested. I still think that is what you wanna do and still think that is what you should do. Your sanity is the most important thing.

[grandmom]

This poor baby. Of course he's full of rage. He's now training his 3rd provider.

I was going to suggest you hang in there so he won't have to go to yet another new place.

Then I read your last post about the lies. Give it the 2 weeks, and then term.

[MamaBear]

This poor baby. Of course he's full of rage. He's now training his 3rd provider.

I was going to suggest you hang in there so he won't have to go to yet another new place.

Then I read your last post about the lies. Give it the 2 weeks, and then term.

Yea I agree. I would feel bad for him to switch to a 3rd daycare if it didnt work out here - so I feel like I should give him time to get better here. But then the lies from the mom intermixed with the constant raging makes it really hard for me to do it. I'll give him until the end of next week and if its still bad, then he'll be outta here!