The Worst Thing A Parent Can Do Is....

[Unregistered]

not an infant, pretty close to the age my son gave up naps...

The two aren't different when a child is living in a home daycare. And even when they aren't, one environment impacts the other.

Yoga isn't really practical to help get infants to sleep in a group setting. Maybe at home or in a preschool setting as a group class.

This kid is over a year and a half and is being left in another room (in a crib?) with a bottle for more than 40 minutes. This is not about an infant, its about a walking, nearly talking toddler who is being treated like an infant and is probably very angry about it.

This is not a co-sleeping issue. If you need this kid to nap, you are going to have to teach him a cool down all brand new from scratch. Have you tried reading a sleepy time book?

[jojosmommy]

having to lay down inorder for a child to fall asleep. I understand when they are infants and what not, but a child who is over a year and a half. So it took 48 minutes of him screaming and throwing his bottle to fall asleep. I did go in a intervals and layed him down never talking to him, but seriously.

First off ditch the bottle. Not good for teeth development both being over 1 yr and still having a bottle and having it at night is terrible for them, and it's basically teaching the kid he needs it to go to bed.

Second, I coslept with my son exclusively for 5 months. No issues. Then I coslept for night feedings and to get him to fall asleep at nap until he was 9 months old. Around then we transitioned him to crib sleeping both nap and night time however he rarely fell asleep on his own. He moved to a big boy bed around 18 months and still occassionally likes when I lay with him or pat his back to go to bed. I found it a great bonding experience. I would guess this mom misses her little one while she is at work and wants to find a way to bond with him at night.

1 1/2 is pretty young to expect them to master sleeping alone at someones house everyday without any issues.

[daycare]

My son is 4 years old and he still sleeps with us... I guess since he will be starting school this year I should start putting him in his bed.. But it is hard. But honestly I wouldn't have done it differently, I have always been home with him and I have so enjoyed the bonding. It made it much easier when I was nursing him to have him in our bed. Now I just have to figure out how to get him out.. although I really don't want to...

Ditto this for me. I cosleep with my almost 4 yr old every night. I will cosleep with him until he starts kinder in 2 years. I have two teenagers who don't want to hug me be seen with me; I'm not cool. They get embarassed when I say I love you. I can't hold them squeeze them and love on them so I will do this to my little guy until he tells me not to anymore.
I have two kids in my care that co sleep at home but have zero issues here. The kids know it's not an option so it's never been an issue.

[nannyde]

1 1/2 is pretty young to expect them to master sleeping alone at someones house everyday without any issues.

Nah it's not. It's way old enough.

I have kids from newborn on who adjust to sleeping alone every day. I don't do anything at all to lull kids to sleep. I put them to bed WIDE awake every day and within a couple of minutes the house is quiet and they all sleep 2.5 hour nap.

There's no age where they are "too young" to sleep at my house alone.

You said in your title line: not an infant, pretty close to the age my son gave up naps...

So the kid is too young to be able to sleep alone at someones house but old enough to give up naps?

Hmmmmmmmmmm

He's no where near the age of giving up naps. He would have four more years of it if he were under my roof.

[sahm2three]

Ditto on the bottle thing. I have my 15 mo screamer who doesn't technically have a bottle, but a sippy that looks like a bottle that HAS to be put down for nap with milk. I know how bad this is, but how am I supposed to break him of this here when this is what they do at home? AND, he is the colicky screamer, and it is HONESTLY the ONLY way to get him to go to sleep. UGH!

[SandeeAR]

I know how bad this is, but how am I supposed to break him of this here when this is what they do at home? AND, he is the colicky screamer, and it is HONESTLY the ONLY way to get him to go to sleep. UGH!

I have my screamer (15 mo) in another room, by herself for naps. She gets a passy anytime she wants it a home. She hasn't had a passy daytime here for months. She hasn't had a passy even at nap in a week.

I have a 19 mo, that never took a bottle to bed, but suddenly Mom and Dad give him a sippy with milk at bed time :confused:. He is still in a baby bed at home. He has been in a toddler bed here for 2 months. NO sippy cup here. The first week in the toddler bed and recent Mondays were a battle. However, he is MUCH better this week.

They learn (here) early on, one thing at home and and usually another set of rules at daycare.

[jojosmommy]

You said in your title line: not an infant, pretty close to the age my son gave up naps...

So the kid is too young to be able to sleep alone at someones house but old enough to give up naps?

Hmmmmmmmmmm

He's no where near the age of giving up naps. He would have four more years of it if he were under my roof.

Actually I did not, that was an unregistered poster. All my dck's nap 2-3 hours per day even the 7 yr old school ager who only attends occassionally.

[nannyde]

Actually I did not, that was an unregistered poster. All my dck's nap 2-3 hours per day even the 7 yr old school ager who only attends occassionally.

Sorry... I thought that was unregistered but when I looked at it again I thought it was you.

Sorry

[cheerfuldom]

I never nursed my kids to sleep or laid down with them past 5 months for each girl but the thing is, I can do whatever I want with my own kid. The problem happens when DC parents do what they want and do not prepare their child for group care. I do not rock to sleep, bottle feed to sleep, read books to sleep, pat backs or anything. Everyone from 4 months on goes to bed on their own. My 9 week old daughter even does this. I don't know how parents and kids function at all without a routine, self soothing skills and regular sleep. I dont understand people who say kids under 3 should give up naps.

[PeanutsGalore]

This kid is over a year and a half and is being left in another room (in a crib?) with a bottle for more than 40 minutes. This is not about an infant, its about a walking, nearly talking toddler who is being treated like an infant and is probably very angry about it.

This is not a co-sleeping issue. If you need this kid to nap, you are going to have to teach him a cool down all brand new from scratch. Have you tried reading a sleepy time book?

Your responses are mixing up my post with the OP. Your suggestions for helping a kid to sleep are really good, valid suggestions, and worth trying for any parent who is teaching their kid to fall asleep on their own, a skillset that can be learned at a much earlier age than is commonly believed, IMO. And to clarify, learning to sleep on their own does not mean that they can't cosleep. It may have been implied somewhere along the lines, but I never said that and don't buy into it.

The primary issue that the op pointed out, is a child who NEEDS to be put to sleep for naps during daycare hours, whether that means they have to be rocked, walked, take yoga, need a bottle, or any other external means to help them nap. It doesn't work well in a group setting, and if the parents are doing that at home and the child doesn't know how to lay down and go to sleep on their own during daycare hours, then it's the parents' responsibility to help find a solution, or hire a nanny who can provide one-on-one attention.

I will absolutely try your suggestions for yoga and relaxation with my own child at night. How would you suggest that this method be implemented during the day, in a group setting where it's possible that one provider is in charge of 4 infants?

[PeanutsGalore]

And for the registered users who cosleep like I do, how do you work it into the daycare setting? My kid can take anywhere from 5 - 45 minutes to fall asleep. I've been able to make it work, but it means he has to wait until everyone else is sound asleep in a safe place before he can go to sleep, and if they wake up before he goes down, or make a funny noise, I have to stop nursing him to go check on them. Does anyone have a better method?

[countrymom]

And for the registered users who cosleep like I do, how do you work it into the daycare setting? My kid can take anywhere from 5 - 45 minutes to fall asleep. I've been able to make it work, but it means he has to wait until everyone else is sound asleep in a safe place before he can go to sleep, and if they wake up before he goes down, or make a funny noise, I have to stop nursing him to go check on them. Does anyone have a better method?

thats what I use to do, it is a pain but I couldn't figure out a another way.

[countrymom]

I should add, that I just don't dump the kids in bed. I give a 15 min. warning. We change diapers and we start to clean up. Same routine everyday (I believe in routine and letting the kids know what we are doing) but its hard to lay down with a kid in a group setting.

[Unregistered]

I think its wrong to blame the parents here

And it might also be true that your house isn't working for this kid, just not a good fit.

Naps without an adult in sight....don't work for alot of kids, don't me a lot of regs.

Obviously the warning, change, cleanup is winding him up.

There are ways to get him calm, but if he knows you are going to do this, he is going to fight back, which he is. Is he still cooperating during clean up? Five minutes of quiet time before the actual nap- story....song....something to change the mood from a battle of wills.

Move his sleep spot. Give him a blanket where you are and move him to the crib if/when he dozes.

Look for other issues - is he hungry, thirsty, obviously he is changed... does he just crave the one on one time? Can you put him down last and give him some nap music?

Are you sure he naps at home and mom always lays down with him?

I didn't lay down with my son until he was ditching naps, and honestly, it didn't work, but some days I really wished it would and I could nap too.

Gonna be hard daycare days for this one if he ditches naps for good now.