Sports And How They Affect Your Daycare, Home Life, Etc.

[wdmmom]

from some of the past threads you've posted, and now this one, wdmmom has shown a lot of resentment towards the stepson and some towards the DH. If I recall correctly, DH isn't much help in any situations. And while I do understand the situation and how it's all fallen on your lap, just remember, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON. I am not religious by any means, none whatsoever, but I do believe that whether it be god, or some other force out there, you are never given more than you can handle. Even though it will feel like that, and I feel like that a lot. I think it's just meant to help you grow and become a better person.

Don't let this get you down. I know some of it is coming off harsh, but partially it's because of the way your posts are written. They come across as you resent having to give up your time and energy.

If your children want to do this stuff, and you are able to make it work, tell the kids they are responsible to help keep the house clean, make suppers, do laundry, or whatever else. Otherwise you will put an end to all the extra curricular activites so that YOU do have time to do this stuff. If they aren't willing to help, then you aren't willing to go the extra mile.

If GMA is pushing so hard for this, tell her to fund the activities, help get them to and from the activities, and whatever else. End of story. If GMA isn't willing to help with the funds and travel, then tell her to keep her mouth shut, as you cannot afford to do it, and she's causing tension in the family.

Thank you! and thank you to the poster before you!

There is a lot of tension and gma has caused most of it. She's the one that enlisted the stepson in every activity imaginable. She's also very well to do and is all about coughing up money but when it comes to helping out in any other sort of way...travel, snacks, equipment, babysitting, etc. It's not just a NOPE, it's a HE!! NO!

My dh and I might live together but we're miles apart. That's why I consider myself a single parent. If he's there, great, if not, great too. Me and the kiddos can survive regardless. I've learned that once before! Sink or swim, right?!

[Crystal]

Wow....how did this turn into a beat up on WDMmom? She asked a simple question and started getting ripped....I can see how that might make some of her later posts a tad defensive.

WDMMOM.....You need to do what works best for YOU and YOUR family. I think organized sports are highly overrated and that if you are giving your child enough attention, love and quality time and quality life experiences then you are doing above and beyond and sports happen when and if you have the time, patience and means to do it. Not everyone is, nor can be, a "soccer mom"

I never did sports related stuff with my children when they were little. Hubby played every sport imaginable with them and they know all of the rules, regs , etc. for every sport there is, and that, when they were younger, was enough for them.....as teenagers, yes they have played, but it has been on school teams, not paying out the rear for a leaque team.

How about getting a few friends of your sons together occasionally or kids from the neighborhood and let them toss the ball at home? It's a great way for them to get practice, a great way to learn about being fair and being a team player and will give you an idea if putting money into is going to be worth it....some kids join a team and then end up hating it and quitting....so I say start small, teach em' a few plays, teach them the rules and let em' play at home or the park.

[wdmmom]

Wow....how did this turn into a beat up on WDMmom? She asked a simple question and started getting ripped....I can see how that might make some of her later posts a tad defensive.

WDMMOM.....You need to do what works best for YOU and YOUR family. I think organized sports are highly overrated and that if you are giving your child enough attention, love and quality time and quality life experiences then you are doing above and beyond and sports happen when and if you have the time, patience and means to do it. Not everyone is, nor can be, a "soccer mom"

I never did sports related stuff with my children when they were little. Hubby played every sport imaginable with them and they know all of the rules, regs , etc. for every sport there is, and that, when they were younger, was enough for them.....as teenagers, yes they have played, but it has been on school teams, not paying out the rear for a leaque team.

How about getting a few friends of your sons together occasionally or kids from the neighborhood and let them toss the ball at home? It's a great way for them to get practice, a great way to learn about being fair and being a team player and will give you an idea if putting money into is going to be worth it....some kids join a team and then end up hating it and quitting....so I say start small, teach em' a few plays, teach them the rules and let em' play at home or the park.

Thanks Crystal! He does engage in roller hockey in the street with other kids in the neighborhood, he does play basketball and he loves playing football in the front yard too.

I have a few guy friends that come over and play with him on a regular basis and I'm not afraid to throw a ball either!

[Meeko]

OK.....there are a lot of posts here....

I hope this doesn't offend anyone, but there are a bazillion ways to run a family and quite honestly I don't think anyone has it down to perfection. Every single household is different. Different personalities, different opinions, different likes and dislikes.

Some think sports are a must. Some hate it (put me in that category). In our house...music is a must. I am sure there are households out there with no music at all.

There is no right and wrong here. Just choices. Do what is right for YOUR family. One family's routine will not work for another's.

My personal opinion, for what little it's worth? If it's THAT important to your son to play....then he needs to sacrifice for it. The sacrifice should not be all yours. Have him call around and help arrange carpool trips etc and see if it's even possible. Have him earn the money for uniforms etc.

My daughter is a singer. She is involved with lots of choir stuff with school, belongs to a local town choir and takes private voice lessons. It takes up a lot of her time. And she is expected to put a small amount of her allowance towards the lessons and keep up on her practicing. She does this willingly which proves to us that she is dedicated. She is also expected to keep up her school grades too. Because she is so dedicated....I bust my butt to make sure we help her with her goals. She's a high school junior and wants to go to college on a music scholarship.

I would sit down and take a long look at your family needs and wants and plan accordingly. Expect the members of your family to make sacrifices too. Being a child is not all about being indulged and mom making all the sacrifices.

But that's just my two cents worth.

Don't let anyone else influence your decision. This is YOUR family. Feel good about your choices and to heck with what other people think!

Good luck!