Daycare Provider/Facebook Posts

[Unregistered]

I'd like some opinions on this...

My daycare provider has friended me on facebook. She posts often about how (in roundabout ways) she doesn't like her job. The job I pay her to do! The job that allows her to stay home with her daughter...something I'd trade anything to be able to do! I know it's not easy...no job is. But I wouldn't be complaining to my boss about my job! I like my paycheck, thank you!

I'm so irritated and frustrated and I don't know what to do. It's hurtful and very unprofessional in my eyes. Do I say something? If I do, I worry that she will just fester and be angry with us. But by ignoring it, my husband and I are growing increasingly annoyed with her. And now I worry my child (and the others) isn't well cared for if shes busy posting on facebook all the time.

So what do I do? Has anyone else had a similar situation? How did you handle it?

[cheerfuldom]

It sounds very unprofessional. I think you have to weigh what exactly she is saying. She should not be online all day and should not be making specific comments about kids or parents. However, if she is venting to friends in a general way (like "had a long day, now I am ready for a nap") than I would unfriend her and give her the space to do that. I understand why you would have mixed feelings on this but from the provider's standpoint, she does need some outlets and it may be best for the two of you not to use FB as a means of communicating.

[Crystal]

Facebook is dangerous.

I would ask her about it. I'd ask her if there is anything that she needs to make her job more enjoyable. I'd ask her if she feels that her unhappiness with her work affects her care of the children. I'd be ready to remove my children from her care. I'd be freindly, but direct.

Now, sure, we all have bad days....but when we begin to complain on a regular basis, then it is time for some self-reflection and an honest assessment of where we stand in our career. If we aren't happy, then it is time to try something new....and that goes for ANY job......not just the some times unthankful job of child care.

I beleive that if a provider is at the point that they are complaining to the parent about their work with children, then they are on serious burnout and need to take a break. I'd either offer to help her, or move my children.

[GG~DAYCARE]

I am friends on fb with some of my parents. I never post about my daycare day!!! Oh how I would love to say something like " Boy, am I glad this week is over. The kids have been bonkers all week!" I don't because of the same thing. I don't want my parents to feel it is their child that made me so tired or that maybe I am getting too old for my job! I agree, unfb friend her. If this is the only thing you see wrong going on than unfriend her today. Good luck!!

[Unregistered]

Thanks for your replies!

I totally understand that everyone needs to vent...I do, you do, we all do! But there is a time and a place and certain people to do it with. She should have made a seperate account for work and one for freinds where she can complain away and none of us would know...

She never names names, but she's always complaining about it being Monday, how she needs more long weekends, vacations, "Hopeless" dreams of a day off, and this is a beauty: "Wish there was one day where I didn't have to listen to a child cry and scream for what seems like hours!! Ahhhh- I need a day off!!"

I mean, come on!

[grandmom]

I agree with you. I'd be upset too.

Unfriend her.

[Live and Learn]

I would speak to your daycare provider.
Communication is everything.

BTW. She isn't all that smart.....IMO she is biting the hand that feeds her. That usually doesn't end well. ::

[Ariana]

I'm friends with my DCM's as well and make sure I don't do this!! It's pretty unprofessional IMO. Is it possible that she's just a big complainer and isn't really serious about it? I have FB friends that complain constantly, it's annoying!!

[Unregistered]

Ohhh, she's serious! It's pretty much the only thing she complains about.

Now see, I could unfriend her....but then I have no idea what smack she's talking. I kind of want to know now! It will only hide the problem from me instead of making it go away.

Would the providers out there be angry with the parents if they brought something like this up? My child is there all day with her...I don't want him to suffer any backlash or ill will that she would possibly have with us!

She's totally biting the hand that feeds her...it just amazes me.

[Michael]

Ohhh, she's serious! It's pretty much the only thing she complains about.

Now see, I could unfriend her....but then I have no idea what smack she's talking. I kind of want to know now! It will only hide the problem from me instead of making it go away.

Would the providers out there be angry with the parents if they brought something like this up? My child is there all day with her...I don't want him to suffer any backlash or ill will that she would possibly have with us!

She's totally biting the hand that feeds her...it just amazes me.

As long as your employee is doing her job and not slandering you I would not worry about it. This person has obviously not learned how to manage her image. The world has changed and she should be using the web in a better manner.

[sharlan]

I am friends with former clients on fb. I would never post anything anywhere (fb, forum, etc) that I would be embarrased or afraid to say in person to anybody...

First you need to talk to her and question what she has posted. If she tells you that she's burned out, it's time to find new daycare.

[momofthree]

I think you should confront her about her status on fb. You should try to help her like saying talking to her, bring her some coffee, thank you verbal or by email. Providers appreciate these things. Yes it might be unprofessional but that is the only way she can vent or maybe she is reaching out there to get help. It might not be the kids but alot of it can be the parents not you but some of her parents that she has, maybe late for pick up, not paying her on time. So try to talk to her.

[Live and Learn]

As long as your employee is doing her job and not slandering you I would not worry about it. This person has obviously not learned how to manage her image. The world has changed and she should be using the web in a better manner.

Technically the daycare provider is not the parent's employee. If they were, the parent would have to pay social security, workman's comp, minimum wage, etc.

I understand what you are saying though.

Op: that would totally bug me. I would speak to her and be prepared to look for a new daycare. The same dc provider who is stupid enough to post on FB how much she doesn't like her job is also the same dc provider who will flip out if you try to speak to her as an adult about it::.

[daycare]

I hate FB
introduce her to this site so that she can vent to people who understand...
You never vent to the people who pay you....

[Blackcat31]

OP, as a daycare provider, I wish all parents who had an issue or concern over something would come directly to me with those concerns. If I have an issue with a parent and I need for change to happen, I go directly to that parent. Venting is a fabulous outlet for release of stress and tension, however, it doesn't really solve anything....kwim? My advice would be to simply explain your concerns to your provider/friend.

In her defense, she may never have even considered how her posts (vents) read to others and would appreciate your bringing it up. Of course, bringing your concerns to her in a positive way will help. Maybe try saying that you just wanted to share your concerns with her because others may view it as unprofessional and you would hate for her to be thought of that way when you value her services....