The FUNNY Thread - What Made You Laugh Today?

[dave4him]

A few days ago i took my daugther to Victoria Secret to buy something nice for mommy for Christmas. This evening she was referencing such item while we were driving to the movie place to pick up our tickets for Breaking Dawn. In trying to explain what item of clothing she was speaking of she said, you know the thing mommy puts on her boobies. I couldnt stop laughing. she she tried to get me to stop laughing by saying something else equally funny i wont repeat. Anyway thats my five year old for you

[BigMama]

Me sternly to DCB age 2.5: "R., how did your corn on the cob end up on G.'s plate?"
DCB: "It flew over there!"

Also from this morning:
Me as I lift DCG, 2, onto the changing table: "Oh, you are getting to be a big girl!"
DCG: "No I am not. I am little."
Me: "How little?"
DCG: "Teeny tiny like a little diamond!" ::

[SilverSabre25]

DCB 3 was standing on the stairs as I was answering the door.

DCB: "Ding dong, ding dong! I'm a ding-dong!"

I about fell over laughing. oh, children and their double entendres!

[dave4him]

My DD was riding her bike in the driveway while i cleaned the garage, she got off, grabbed some chalk, and said 'im going to play hopscotch, but im leaving my helmet on in case i fall down."

didnt realize how dangerous the game had become since i was a kid

[Kaddidle Care]

One little boy came in with a funny scab right across his nose. I asked him what happened and he said "I filed it with a nail file!" :: It about put me in histerics - mainly because it would have been a stunt my oldest son would have done if he had the chance.

[Zoe]

So we're making our "thankful for..." baskets with leaves glued on saying what the kids are thankful for. My one dcg3 has a great start. She's saying all of the members of her family, her house....then she must be getting bored and off-task because the last two thankfuls are for her feet and stairs! ::::::

I put it on there! She's thankful to have feet and stairs.

[mema]

2DCB's where talking about the Statue of Liberty and asked where she came from. I looked it up to double check and show them a picture. I said she was a gift from France. Without missing a beat, the both said, "San Francisco!!!" I said, huh?:confused::confused::confused: Forgetting relatives just visited San Francisco!

[Michelle]

http://losangeles.craigslist.org/lgb/kid/2742602865.html

Check out the picture of the kid on the cot sleeping!

[Sunchimes]

Does this mean I probably won't get a Christmas bonus? Every single day for the last 10 days or so, dcm has stood around talking at pick up or drop-off (not unusual), telling me their money problems. Baby due in Jan and they are having to pay so much a week to cover what insurance didn't pay, hubby's car in the shop for major repairs, dental surgery, Christmas, yada yada yada. They've never failed to pay me, so I'm not really concerned about that. I can't figure out why the money issues or why she's telling me. Two people with good jobs living in a small town should be doing just fine.

I realized today that she was setting me up so that I wouldn't expect anything for Christmas. :: I've known her long enough that I'm not expecting anything, so she doesn't have to tell me her financial issues. ;-)

[Luna]

I figured out a couple of days ago one of my dcbs has a bizarre idea of what firefighters do. He was telling me about his home and they have a fireplace, and the firemen will come and put fire in it...they will park the firetruck and fire will come out of the hoses. I told him if there is a fire where we don't want one the firemen will come and put water on it and put it out. He looked at me like I had two heads. "What???? Put water on it???" We need to have a talk

[kidkair]

My 3 year old "making" holy guacamole

[Blackcat31]

http://losangeles.craigslist.org/lgb...742602865.html

Check out the picture of the kid on the cot sleeping!

OMG! That is too funny!! ::::

[Michelle]

OMG! That is too funny!! ::::

I just don't know why little Johnny is running around so wild every day!
::::::

[Blackcat31]

Check these out! http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/45643760/

I think my favorite is the use of the Magna Doodle! ::::

[SilverSabre25]

-dcb's mom arrived. "DCB, it's time to go!"
-DCB: "No! I want to play!"
-Used to this, dcm and I take the chance to chat for a few moments. Another dcp arrives. I tell the kids to start cleaning up the outdoor toys. I tell dcb to clean up.
-dcb drops what he's playing with and trots right over to his mom, saying brightly, "I can't! It's time for me to go home!"

Haha, nice try, Mr. Slick! Yeah, I don't think so. DCM backed me up and after a prolonged scream-fit, he managed to put away several toys and go home.