Daycare Mom Letting Herself In...

[jen]

I wouldn't be pissed
Sure everyone is entitled to a little personal privacy... everyone also has different personal boundries!

Absolutely, and we should all be dang sure that we know what the other persons personal boundaries are BEFORE we go walking in to someone elses bedroom.

[QualiTcare]

No this mom did not try to call me on my phone at all. She terminated the next day with and refused to give her notice. I slept in once in years, I felt bad yes but my alarm was set just didn't go off...I'm sure others have slept in once in a while for work too.

i'm sure most if not all of us have slept in for work - but most of us (or maybe not) would be thankful if someone came and woke us up and there was no consequence.

i wouldn't be surprised if the daycare mom laughed it off and your relationship continued unchanged, but by your reaction here - i can only imagine the reaction she got played a part in her terminating care.

i have to ask - would you rather your first daycare parent come in and wake you or would you rather continue sleeping and lose the day's pay for all of your children along with all of the parent's trust - and possibly all of them terminating which is equivalent to losing your job?

[MamaBearSD]

Right to inspect

I don't know what state you are in or if you are a licensed day care. (?) I don't know about all states, though I would think the regulations would be similar, but in California, the parent has the right to inspect your home. There are no "off-limit" areas unless specifically designated in your license. If she was dropping he child off at the regular time, then I'd say technically it is a time "children are in care", and she has every right to go look for you. What did you expect her to do, leave her child unsupervised downstairs?

I think you give up a large portion of your personal privacy when you make your home your business, especially when it's mandated that parents are allowed to inspect without advance notice.

[Babybear911]

Omg

Yikes! How embarrassing! I feel for you...I don't know what I would do or say or feel after! I would be seriously unnerved they felt so free to walk upstairs to "my" living space! My daycare is situated exactly like yours. That would be my worst nightmare! LOL! My kids would probably speak up and ask why they are in our home! LOL! They are 6 and 10 years old and not afraid to let dcp and DCK know when they are stepping over the line. I have a much harder time with that! Let me know how you handle it! I might need the same advice one of these days!

[Babybear911]

I don't know what state you are in or if you are a licensed day care. (?) I don't know about all states, though I would think the regulations would be similar, but in California, the parent has the right to inspect your home. There are no "off-limit" areas unless specifically designated in your license. If she was dropping he child off at the regular time, then I'd say technically it is a time "children are in care", and she has every right to go look for you. What did you expect her to do, leave her child unsupervised downstairs?

I think you give up a large portion of your personal privacy when you make your home your business, especially when it's mandated that parents are allowed to inspect without advance notice.

The parent wasn't inspecting... They didnt even TRY The front door or the door bell. They were snooping! Parents right my butt!

When I got licensed it states the measurements of the daycare space and it is also listed at front door where fire drills are recorded. Parents know upstairs is my family space. Certain that parent was aware that was not part of the daycare. Good luck! Maybe give notice and find another parent who respect boundaries? Yikes! Yikes! Yikes!


Ring the door bell! Knock on door! Don't just walk all over house! Seriously ignorant. And yes their is an "off-limit" area! Upstairs!! Did dcp forget how to push door bell? Did dcp forget she doesn't "own" dcp or dcp home!

Would you just walk through a friend or a family members home like that? I wouldn't! I would wait at door until they answered.

[MarinaVanessa]

I don't know what state you are in or if you are a licensed day care. (?) I don't know about all states, though I would think the regulations would be similar, but in California, the parent has the right to inspect your home. There are no "off-limit" areas unless specifically designated in your license.

I'm in CA and the parent only has access to the DC space in your home. If you allow DC kids in your living room, kitchen, dining room etc. then yes they have access to those areas during the time that their child is in child care. They do not however have access to the areas that are not designated for child care.

In most circumstances (and certainly in mine) bedrooms are not a part of that space. My entire 2nd floor is not a part of DC therefore no parent has the permission to go up there. Why you'd want to include your own bedroom as DC space is beyond me but I'm sure some providers do it. I'm only quoting you MamaBear so that people can get a good understanding about what "open-door" policy is and trying to clarify what "designated in your license" means.

I'd like to go back to the whole center-based daycare example again. If you were to arrive to a daycare to inspect it you are well within your right to so as it pertains to DC space but how many centers do you think would allow a parent to inspect maintenence rooms, closets and administrative offices, break areas etc.? I'm pretty sure that none. Just food for thought. I'm personally still on the fence of whether or not the parent was in the right and even if this whole situation got blown way out of proportion for that matter. I'm still pondering.

[mrsp'slilpeeps]

This post is kinda old!!!

[Christian Mother]

I had to add...I didn't get to read all the posts but for me..I also have a open door policy..

Each of my parents have a key to the gated property. But not to my door. They know if I am up by the lights to the house being on. I unlock the door and there has been times that I've forgotten to unlock it as I allow the parents to just come on in. But there has been a couple times my alarm didn't go off and I hear the gate open and I am in a mad rush to get to the door...! Thank goodness I have pj's on..heheh! They all know though that I slept in though based on my pj's..heheh!! I haven't ever felt embarrassed though just a little sheepish.....opps!!

If my husband ever left a door open or unlocked I would prob. be shaken by being woken up but I would be happier it be a parent then a stranger. Most of my parents would of thought it would be funny. I only have 5 families and we have a really good relationship so I would of thought I was on "punk'd" or something..we'd have a good laught but with my personality I wouldn't be upset. And I don't think they would either. We've all had something like that happen maybe in dif. ways. But I'd be happy it was them and not someone else..kwim?

[momma2girls]

I would have been scared to death!!
I have never overslept (knock on wood) in over 8 yrs.
I hate it when daycare parents, don't knock, they just let themselves in. I have been scared many times!!I also have this written into my daycare,to please repect my home and daycare, to please knock before entering.

[Unregistered]

Wow
Just because someone has sex, conceives a child, gives birth to a child and pays for child care services does NOT mean they are trustworthy people. More than half of our prison population are parents. That's a REDICULOUS notion.

That's harsh. I don't think anyone was implying that the act of creating a child makes them trustworthy. I think the point is that our day care families are not strangers. We see these people almost everyday of our lives. We interact with them. We have relationships with them. AND, yes, we take care of their precious little ones. If I was no where to be found when my families came in the morning, I'd expect them to call my name and look for me! I do not think they would be thinking, "Ha! This is our chance to check out Miss Sara's bedroom!" They would probably be worried!
P.S. The word is spelled "ridiculous."

[renodeb]

Did she show up early? Why would you be sleeping if you knew a child was coming? Either way she should of called or something. That would be weird if a parent did that.
Debbie

[Lucy]

Just pointing out that this thread is 14 months old.

[rhondawarren]

I slept in for the first time in years two weeks ago and was shocked at what happened. My husband had already left for work so the side door was unlocked. My daycare parents always knock and walk into my porch area for pick ups and drop offs. That morning a daycare mom came with her two and half year old son and did what she typically would do, knocked and walked into the porch area. When I did not come to the door though she proceeded to wander through my home looking for me until she found me in bed sleeping. I was just completely shocked. I felt really bad for sleeping in but I honestly do not think that this lady had a right to be wandering around my house either. I hold an open door policy when a client's child is in my care, not when I do not have the child yet. Plus my daycare is run downstairs and my upstairs is suppose to be our private home. How would you feel if one of your daycare parents did this?

I would be highly ticked off if someone came on into my house! Very strange, I would never do that to someone. That is just weird and she should have felt strange about it because the truth is ... its very strange that she helped herself in.

[momma2girls]

I would be highly ticked off if someone came on into my house! Very strange, I would never do that to someone. That is just weird and she should have felt strange about it because the truth is ... its very strange that she helped herself in.

the least she could have done is rang the doorbell, or yelled out your name a bunch of times!!!

[My3cents]

Thought I would put a my cents in here.

I am going to do give you my thoughts coming from the daycare parents side. Normally you would be open and ready to go. This parent is used to the door being unlocked for her to come in. She went in. She saw that things didn't look right and she got concerned. She didn't know what she was walking into and probably thought the worst. She didn't know if someone was in your house and what she would find. Things were not normal. She didn't call out to you because she had downstairs and got no answer, then she was worried for you.

I would cut her a break. I don't think she was being nosey. I think she was concerned. Scared.

Seperate story- Thank God a women had the nerve to come into my mothers home, and let her know her grandson was roaming around at 4am outside, with no clothes on, with her keys, and took his hand and brought him in her house. She was sleeping. He woke up and decided he was going on an adventure, got into her car turned on the lights, pulled off his diaper, was playing in the sandbox at 4am. My mother was devastated. Had a chair up against the door so he could unlock it. I thank God that someone cared enough to care. The possibilities are endless of what could have happened to him. We later found out that our son was a sleepwalker and we think he was sleep walking but then awoke and being a curious boy just went about playing and trying stuff he knew no one was around to tell him no too. He was two- He was having a sleep over at Gramma's.

I do get how you feel violated and how your parent was not happy. Last time I checked we are all human and make mistakes.... things happen. Now if you were doing this on a regular basis, forget it.......you would be done. Parents are always late with one excuse or another. I see both sides of this, but you made me think of that angel that stopped and cared enough about my baby when I was not able to be there.