10 Month Old Hysterical Fit

[midaycare]

I have a 10 month old. Not the easiest baby. Been here for 2 months.

She used to scream bloody murder every time I put her down, but I've made leaps and bounds progress. She will play a little now. However, if I don't pick her up when she wants she screams like I've never heard. It's pure fit, nothing is wrong.

I'm trying to ignore, but she will go on and on without stopping, so it doesn't give me an opportunity to pick her up when she stops screaming. Then I pick her up and it's like a reward for screaming.

This will probably pass in a few months, but ugh. Any suggestions? The screaming is so loud!

[hwichlaz]

stick her in her bed every time...tell her she can come out when she's done

[midaycare]

stick her in her bed every time...tell her she can come out when she's done

I have tried that. She wins the battle of the wills. She could cry all day if she doesn't get what she wants.

I want to give her the attention she needs, but in a positive way and not feel forced to do it.

[Mom2Two]

Ten months old...sheesh. Are the parents concerned? Does she do it at home (that they admit to)? Could you start asking what the doctor says about it?

Does she take good naps? What are her hours?

[Blackcat31]

stick her in her bed every time...tell her she can come out when she's done

This.

My screamer had staying power too and for a short time I honestly thought they'd stay in the crib forever and I doubted my method and wondered when I'd have to cave as the babe wasn't getting anything positive at all....

But alas! One day, I prevailed... I noticed after 10 minutes in the crib, the screeching has stopped. I waited with baited breath..... no, quiet. No screeching, no whining, no crying.

So of course I went in and made a HUGE deal out of it and what do you know.... babe still screams now and then (very short fuse and automatic tantrum) but a few minutes of calm down time in the crib seems to hit the reset button and it's all good. So I think the trick is you have to be more stubborn or patient (which ever word you prefer ) than they are.

But I will agree...the level of stubborn-ness in these kids now days is astounding! ...and impressive.

[Josiegirl]

I must be the wuss of the group because I'd pick her up. I know my 12 mo has been going through separation anxiety for a couple weeks or so. And dcg won't let anyone pick her up except me, dcm, and grandma. Granted, I can't/don't/won't rush to pick her up if I'm busy doing something else important but I will talk with her and reassure her she's okay and I'll be right there.

[midaycare]

Ten months old...sheesh. Are the parents concerned? Does she do it at home (that they admit to)? Could you start asking what the doctor says about it?

Does she take good naps? What are her hours?

Naps always start out by screaming. But after 10 min, she's down.

This is a baby that's held all the time. Parents won't cop to it, but it's so very clear.

[midaycare]

This.

My screamer had staying power too and for a short time I honestly thought they'd stay in the crib forever and I doubted my method and wondered when I'd have to cave as the babe wasn't getting anything positive at all....

But alas! One day, I prevailed... I noticed after 10 minutes in the crib, the screeching has stopped. I waited with baited breath..... no, quiet. No screeching, no whining, no crying.

So of course I went in and made a HUGE deal out of it and what do you know.... babe still screams now and then (very short fuse and automatic tantrum) but a few minutes of calm down time in the crib seems to hit the reset button and it's all good. So I think the trick is you have to be more stubborn or patient (which ever word you prefer ) than they are.

But I will agree...the level of stubborn-ness in these kids now days is astounding! ...and impressive.

I'm envisioning an hour of her screaming. Isn't that...child abuse?

[Ariana]

I'm envisioning an hour of her screaming. Isn't that...child abuse?

How is this child abuse? Is crying all day long beneficial for the child? Any time you are trying to do what is best for the child in the end is the opposite of child abuse.

At some point this child is going to have to be broken of this atrocious habit she has gotten into. It ****s that you have to do it as a caregiver but you have two options. Break the habit, or recreate her home environment at your house. There is no in between when you have a screamer.

[Blackcat31]

I'm envisioning an hour of her screaming. Isn't that...child abuse?

Forcing her to stay is probably child abuse (term used lightly) but she is choosing to be separated from others. (screaming)

[midaycare]

How is this child abuse? Is crying all day long beneficial for the child? Any time you are trying to do what is best for the child in the end is the opposite of child abuse.

At some point this child is going to have to be broken of this atrocious habit she has gotten into. It ****s that you have to do it as a caregiver but you have two options. Break the habit, or recreate her home environment at your house. There is no in between when you have a screamer.

I was using child abuse lightly, but you know...that gets thrown around alot. I can't tell you how many times I've read about so-and-so daycare provider who left a crying kid in a pack and play for a long time. I don't want to be the provider everyone is talking about

[midaycare]

Forcing her to stay is probably child abuse (term used lightly) but she is choosing to be separated from others. (screaming)

Do you think a 10 month old has the ability to truly understand this consequence? Anything 12 months and under isn't my specialty as I take so few of them.

[Ariana]

I was using child abuse lightly, but you know...that gets thrown around alot. I can't tell you how many times I've read about so-and-so daycare provider who left a crying kid in a pack and play for a long time. I don't want to be the provider everyone is talking about

I get what you mean but I think putting a kid in a pack and play and ignoring their basic needs for no reason is child abuse. Trying to help a child break a bad habit is not in my opinion. I mean if she was crying for 8 hours a day for 3 days then I would call it quits and term but I can bet she doesn't do this. The problem is people are giving into the crying and it has become a learned response. To me THAT is abusive. It is setting the child up for a miserable life at daycare full of anxiety because the parents did not have the sense to help her transition to not being held all day.

If a 10 month old can see that the consequences of crying for prolonged period of time gets her picked up she can also unlearn it.

[midaycare]

I get what you mean but I think putting a kid in a pack and play and ignoring their basic needs for no reason is child abuse. Trying to help a child break a bad habit is not in my opinion. I mean if she was crying for 8 hours a day for 3 days then I would call it quits and term but I can bet she doesn't do this. The problem is people are giving into the crying and it has become a learned response. To me THAT is abusive. It is setting the child up for a miserable life at daycare full of anxiety because the parents did not have the sense to help her transition to not being held all day.

If a 10 month old can see that the consequences of crying for prolonged period of time gets her picked up she can also unlearn it.

Yes, she can go sometimes a half hour without needing me. And then I try to do positive reinforcement. But the first time I'm doing someone else's diaper or reaching for something and she decides it's time to be held...crying fit!

[storybookending]

I’m gonna squeeze my 10 month old a little tighter tomorrow. His cat naps drive me nuts and his refusal to hold his own bottle but man I can’t imagine him being a screamer like that. My niece that attends a different daycare and only comes here when it’s closed is 9 months and she’s a screamer. With her when she gets like that if her basic needs are met and she’s not wet or hungry it’s in the pack & play she goes.