Picky eaters

[mac60]

How do you deal with picky eaters in your home daycare. I am so sick of throwing food out, that I buy out of my measly income, because a 2 1/2 yr old is so damn picky. I typically offer 3 to 4 foods for lunch, and it just frustrates me when I am day after day throwing the same child's food away because they won't eat it. I am very cautious in the amount I give to the picky ones, but still day in and day out of throwing food out, is very frustrating. I have tried time outs, no snacks, removing from table and making them sit alone to eat, to no avail. I finally have given up, don't eat your lunch your done for the day.

So how do you handle picky eaters.

[tymaboy]

There is nothing you can do if a child does not eat. I offer something from each food group & if they dont eat then they dont eat. I will offer them a small snack in the afternoon but I never give them something different cuz they choose not to eat. I have a good idea of how much a certain child normanly eats so I will give him just that amount, if he/she wants more then they get more but this way I can refrigerate the left overs. If they are hungry they will eat or they wait till they get home.

I am pretty luck the parents I have now understand that if they refuse to eat not to give in to them so I will tell the parents if they ate their lunch or snack & if not the parent say well I guess they will starve till it is time for dinner.

[Unregistered]

For the hesitant eater, give them a little bit of everything and no seconds on anything unless they eat all of their food. Usually works. For the hard core, not going to eat anything that doesn't come from a McDonald's wrapper, I don't even bother. We do family style and if they don't eat, they don't eat. Not my problem. Mom and Dad will surely pick them something up on the way home. My pickiest eater at the moment is a 7.5 year old. Drives me bonkers, but nothing I can do about it and his eating habits are not worth the stress. If it's not fried or ice cream he's not eating it because it's "bleh". ARRRRRGH.

I know it's a different situation if it's a sensory texture thing and I usually know if the kid just really cannot tolerate certain foods, those things I don't push (just someone try to make me eat a piece of liver), but spoiled I just can't handle.
If they're really hungry they'll eat.

[GretasLittleFriends]

I feed my children family style meaning they all sit at the table together and I set the dishes in the center of the table and dish each child's plate from the main dish. I do this because I have picky eaters. I do need to offer the child the food to be eligible for the food program, but this way it saves on waste. If I know I have a child who refuses to eat watermelon or broccoli I try not to serve that specific food when they are here, but it doesn't always work.

The food program says I need to have available x number of cups of each food for each child. That doesn't mean they have to have x number of cups on their plate, just available.

I have one family where the children hardly eat anything I serve, and they're usually here for dinner when my family eats. I've done the same thing. Say we're having chicken, potatoes, corn, rolls and milk for dinner. That meets program requirements. Each child gets about a tablespoon of each item (except for the roll, I'll split one between them). IF they eat what's on their plate and they want more of something then they can have more. Also, say they eat all of their corn and potatoes but refuse to eat their chicken, yet they want more corn/potatoes I give it to them in small amounts until their requirement for that group is met. Of course if they still want more I usually have made extra so it's not an issue.

On the flip side if they don't eat any of it, A. the dog is happy because she gets a snack B. They'll get their evening snack if they choose to eat it and C. I'm sure they eat at home so they won't starve from missing one meal.

I learned the hard way with this family, and in the beginning was throwing a lot of food away, 'cuz I don't let my dog eat that much table scraps.

[kitkat]

I have one rule the kids must follow: everyone must take the same number of bites for how old they are. That translates to a 2 year old having to take 2 bites of whatever it is they don't like. My parents LOVE the rule because their kids are still getting exposed to the food, but at the same time, aren't forced to eat much of it. Plus I know how much my kids typically eat, so I know just how much to serve each child. I'm not on a food program, so I buy my own food for meals and snacks. If I know a kid doesn't like peaches, then I only serve just enough for them to have their bites.

Forcing a kid to eat only creates a power struggle. Giving time outs or not giving a snack later in the day won't make a kid eat and you shouldn't punish a kid for not eating. If I had a child not eating lunch daily, I would talk to the parents and ask them to provide a sack lunch.

[mac60]

There is simply no way to force a child to eat so many bites that equal their age. I would forcefully have to shove it in their mouth, as they refuse to open it if I try to give them a bite. If I could get the child to eat a few bites, I wouldn't have a problem. I guess I was brought up in the era that you were grateful there was food on the table, and you didn't waste it. I only give maybe a tablespoon of each food to this child, to cut down on waste. But when a child sits there refusing to eat and continually asks for crackers or cookie or chips, yes, you will go to time out for wasting food at my house, and no, you won't get a snack 2 hours later. That is just crazy to throw a child's lunch out then 2 hours later give a snack. That is what I call power control over a parent/provider.

[jen0608]

I'm new here and I motivate Kimi to eat by placing her favorite stuff while we eat like her Spongebob Squarepants toy.

[seashell]

If they don't eat, they don't eat. Getting into a power struggle over lunch is frustrating to everyone involved. They will eat when they are hungry. My mom always forced me to eat and I ended up with an eating disorder. When my kids, don't eat, I save lunch in the fridge and give it to them later at snack time.

[kitkat]

You seem to be really frustrated about the kid not eating and throwing out lunch seems to really upset you. It seems like a big issue to you, so why not just have the parents pack a lunch for the kid? That way it's the parent's food that gets tossed out. Do the parents know that you refuse a snack if the kids don't eat their lunch?

As far as taking bites equal to their age...it is possible without forcing it in their mouth. And having to take the bites is not forcing them to eat. Besides, I let them take tiny bites. It works for me. But what works for one provider doesn't work for all.

[mac60]

yes, the parents know....they are the ones who suggested it.

No packed lunches here, just another can of worms to open.....I can hear the others now, why does he get such and such and such, and we get this. Plus, the mom has enough issues in getting her kid/soon to be 2 kids out the door without worrying about packing a lunch. We have talked about it, they have problems at home too. Kids today need to learn who the adult is and who is in charge. They need to learn that the table isn't a restaurant and that you eat what is served.

As far as making a child eat food will cause eating issues in the future, I am sorry if you feel that happened to you......I personally don't believe that making a child eat their food they are given will cause eating issues. People have eating/weight issues because of the foods they choose to eat and the amounts they eat, and not living an active/healthy lifestyle. Yes, occassionally it is medically realated, but not usually.

[GretasLittleFriends]

My own little guy the other night was unhappy with what I made for dinner and said "I don't like that. I'm not going to eat that. You need to make me something else." He's 4. You know what, he didn't have to eat it at dinner time if he didn't want, but he didn't get anything else to eat until it was gone. It lasted 1.5 days in and out of the fridge. He also only got water to drink, I didn't want him filling up on milk. Guess what, I won, and now he doesn't want to eat his left overs day in and day out. Haven't had an issue since, but this was only last week. Did the same thing w/my 13 yr old daughter several years ago, and haven't had issues w/her since either. Daycare kids are another story of course.

They don't eat I let the dog have a bite and/or throw it away, then they do get the scheduled snack later. All though, depending on what the meal is, I've been known to put it in the fridge and serve it to them during snack time. (Depending on the parent's view) I of course bring the non-eating up with the parents, and they handle it how they see fit.

[Unregistered]

Really, wash your hands of it. Food struggles are not worth it. If they don't eat they don't eat. Let the parents deal with it.
For afternoon snack I serve another fruit or vegetable so if they don't eat at lunch and eat at snack, I still feel like I "won" (Won, because it turns into a horrible little game where the child has the upper hand because you can't force food into their mouths).

I had a parent come in with her two older children and when I explained that because of the food program I just serve a lot of fruits and vegetable she got this funny look on her face and asked if they could bring their own food. She went on about it's not really the kids fault about what they will and won't eat, it was hers because she let them eat that way and they probably wouldn't eat what was served, blah, blah, blah. I told her no. My two - fives probably weren't going to be happy with their plum slices and milk while the 8 and 11 year old were snacking on skittle and potato chips. Guess it was a deal breaker because they didn't come back. Oh well.

I don't let my child get away with it, she's eats what we eat of she's just out of luck, BUT, I attribute a lot of my success with her to her personality, she's open to new things and likes stuff I won't eat (Bizarre Foods is one of her favorite shows).

Just let the parent's continue to feed their children trash because "gee, that's the only thing they will eat" and let them deal with the problems later.

[judytrickett]

I am not a restaurant. I provide a number of different foods for each lunch. If a child chooses not to eat then that is their choice. Kids won't starve themselves. They'll eventually eat when they are hungry enough. As long as you are serving healthy, kid-friendly foods then you are doing enough. The rest is up to them.

[Unregistered]

Good Advice

I used to stress myself out about this as well until I heard/read this statement... As a parent and/or childcare provider, It is my resposibility to serve a balanced meal, it is the child's responsibility to decide what to eat and how much. Sure, you can encourage them and discuss what is healthy for our bodies... but beyond that it is really not something to stress over. Whether the food goes in his tummy or in the trash you will have to serve lunch anyway. So quit making it your problem. Just accept it as one of the "facts of life" as a childcare provider.

[SimpleMom]

I try to find things they do eat. I had one especially picky eater for a few years. Thier favorite food was ketchup toast. I kinda knew ahead of time if he's eat it or not and ask him. The other kids sometimes wanted it, but not all the time. At least I didn't throw food away and he ate it, so he felt better as well.