Picky eaters

[Chickenhauler]

Here's the best trick I ever saw my mother pull on daycare kids-vegetables that may not be that appealing normally (brussel sprouts, broccoli, cauliflower, etc)....put a little piece of cheese on it and let it melt.

Kids will eat ANYTHING if you put cheese on it if you can get them to try it. I swear.


There will always be those kids who won't eat, no matter what you put in front of them. Give them a very small serving, and forget it.

I agree it ****s to throw food away, but even if they ate it, you'd still be out the food (and the money).

At least in our house, it doesn't go to waste....the dog LOVES picky eaters.

[missaimee]

What's the matter with you?

First of all, you CANNOT punish a child for not eating! What is the matter with you?
You can't refuse to give a child a snack because they didn't eat their lunch, and you certainly can't force them to sit and eat alone or do time-outs. How do you think eating disorders, obesity and weird food relationships start? Food is needed for body function - it should never be used as reward or punishment, and a child can not be punished for not eating. That could probably be considered abuse.
You are teaching the child to feel shame because they don't like something! I bet you have a whole list of foods you don't like - How about I feed them to you for lunch everyday, and then punish you for not eating them?

I live in Wisconsin, and we have very strict daycare regulations. And to be honest, if I were a parent and you did that to MY child, I would call every regulating authority and have YOU punished.

Don't complain about your measly income - I make excellent money doing daycare. If you aren't making money, you aren't doing the work required. Somehow I doubt you are certified or licensed, but perhaps you are. If not, get certified, then get State-Licensed. If you are regulated the tax breaks are beyond wonderful. The difference between successful and unsuccessful in-home daycares? The unsuccessful ones are stay-at-home Moms trying to make some extra money - they never really do the work required, they half-ass it. The successful ones are run as a serious business, and the person running them strives to be the best, and becomes a paper person.

Join the food program - I am paid $500 a month by the Food Program. Sure, there is some paperwork you have to fill out, but I do my claiming online. They have requirements for meals and snacks. For example, a snack has to be 2 foods from 2 different food groups, such as string cheese and orange juice. This is to ensure that children are being fed properly. It's not that much extra work for a nice check every month, which should more than cover your food costs.

As far as picky eaters, you don't have to serve them different foods. You make the meal, you serve it to the child, the child decides what and how much to eat. If they don't eat it all, save their plate for later. If they get hungry and don't want to eat the leftovers from their lunch, they have to wait to eat until it is snack time, just like all the other kids. By law in my state, every child MUST be fed at least every 3 hours.

And by the way, when I was a child, I went to a daycare where the woman didn't feed me enough and forced me to miss meals. My mother caught me in the fridge stuffing bologna in my mouth before we left one morning, and when she asked what I was doing, I told her I was eating "So I won't be hungry later." She was furious, and that daycare went out of business shortly after.

[missaimee]

There is simply no way to force a child to eat so many bites that equal their age. I would forcefully have to shove it in their mouth, as they refuse to open it if I try to give them a bite. If I could get the child to eat a few bites, I wouldn't have a problem. I guess I was brought up in the era that you were grateful there was food on the table, and you didn't waste it. I only give maybe a tablespoon of each food to this child, to cut down on waste. But when a child sits there refusing to eat and continually asks for crackers or cookie or chips, yes, you will go to time out for wasting food at my house, and no, you won't get a snack 2 hours later. That is just crazy to throw a child's lunch out then 2 hours later give a snack. That is what I call power control over a parent/provider.

You make it sound as though the child is purposely doing this to aggravate you. You really care that a 2.5 year old, who can't rationalize that they are "wasting food" at your house, doesn't want to eat everything you serve? Children won't starve themselves, and the fact that you take it so personally is alarming.
You CANNOT withhold food, that is abuse. You also cannot give time-outs to children under 3, it is illegal, at least for daycares in WI. Research has proven this isn't effective until age 3, and once they are 3, it is one minute of time-out for each year of age. Also, time-out isn't supposed to be punishment - it is a time for reflection on behavior. Sounds like your house is a whole bunch of fun.
I would really like to know what daycare you run, because you shouldn't be in business.

[mac60]

The accusations on here towards me are getting a little rediculous and I would appreciate that they stop by those that are doing it, and you know who you are. You have absolutely NO IDEA what you are talking about. You don't know me, my program, or anything about me, so I would appreciate it if you would keep your rude remarks about me to yourself.

[missaimee]

I am not being rude, I am being truthful. What you are doing is WRONG.

[missaimee]

This is from the WI Daycare Liscenising Rule Book. You will see that toward the end, it explicitly PROHIBITS withholding or forcing meals or snacks, and defines doing so as child abuse. I am sure you are not a horrible person, but you opened yourself up to criticism by admitting that you punish children for not eating, and withhold snacks.

DCFS
Bureau of Regulation and Licensing
HFS 45 Family Child Care Rule with Commentary HFS 45.07 Program
03/2006
41
45.07(5)(b)
(b) Food shall be served at flexible intervals, but no child may go without nourishment for longer
than 3 hours.
The 3-hour time frame begins when the meal is served, e.g., snack at 9:00 a.m., lunch at noon,
afternoon snack at 3:00.
(c) Each meal and snack shall meet the U.S. department of agriculture child and adult care food
program minimum meal requirements.

______________________________________________-
DCFS
Bureau of Regulation and Licensing
HFS 45 Family Child Care Rule with Commentary HFS 45.07 Program
03/2006
38
45.07(2)(c)3.
3. Physical restraint, binding or tying the child to restrict the child's movement or enclosing the
child in a confined space such as a closet, locked room, box or similar cubicle.
See 45.03(23)
“Physical restraint” does not include:
• Briefly holding a child in order to calm or comfort the child
• Holding a child’s hand or arm to escort the child from one area to another
• Moving a disruptive child who is putting him/herself/others in danger and is unwilling to leave the
area when other methods such as talking to the child have been unsuccessful.
• Intervening or breaking up a fight.
If a child has an outburst that puts him/herself or another person in danger of harm, the center has
the responsibility to protect the child and others from danger. Once a child has an outburst, we
recommend that the center work with the parents to develop a plan to help manage the child’s
behavior in a way that does not include the use of a physical restraint. The center may want to refer
the child to a pediatrician, Birth-to-3, the public school or a mental health professional for an
evaluation.
High chairs may not be used as a physical restraint.
4. Withholding or forcing meals, snacks or naps.
(d) A child may not be punished for lapses in toilet training.
Note: See s. HFS 45.04(8) for information on reporting suspected child abuse and s. HFS 45.04(3)(i) for
rules requiring that inappropriate discipline of a child be reported to the Department within 24 hours after the
occurrence.
(3) EQUIPMENT.

[mac60]

I am not being rude, I am being truthful. What you are doing is WRONG.

No dear, you are being rude. you are saying things based on what you "think" about me. Enough is enough please. You are taking this and making it into something that it isn't. Please stop now.

[missaimee]

How do you deal with picky eaters in your home daycare. I am so sick of throwing food out, that I buy out of my measly income, because a 2 1/2 yr old is so damn picky. I typically offer 3 to 4 foods for lunch, and it just frustrates me when I am day after day throwing the same child's food away because they won't eat it. I am very cautious in the amount I give to the picky ones, but still day in and day out of throwing food out, is very frustrating. I have tried time outs, no snacks, removing from table and making them sit alone to eat, to no avail. I finally have given up, don't eat your lunch your done for the day.

So how do you handle picky eaters.

No, dear, I am not making assumptions about you. That is what you stated. You obviously don't see anything wrong with what you are doing.

[missaimee]

And just as a side note to anyone else reading this, I am not posting these things to be rude, or to be a b*tch. I am posting because I love children, and all children deserve quality care. No child should ever go without food or be punished for not eating or for being picky.

If you are a parent, make sure your provider knows better and doesn't engage in these practices.

If you are a provider, hopefully you know better. If not, now you do know and I truly hope anyone who has done these things will cease and desist immediately.

Regardless of your personal beliefs on what's okay or not okay in child rearing, when you hold yourself out to the public as a business entrusted with the care of children, you cannot engage in these behaviors.