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I have a dcg4 in my care for two months. Parents seem easy going. Never had any issues with them or the child. Yesterday the girl said to me "my mom calls you two-ton Terri". I was shocked. I told her that calling someone names is mean and hurts feelings-just as I tell them if they called another child names. I am not happy. Now I look at this mom in a whole new light.
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I don't even have words.
:hug: I'm sorry. That's awful. -
It'd be difficult to NOT see the dcm in a different light now.
I think I'd have a talk with the group, as a whole, about name-calling, how disrespectful it is, etc., etc. Maybe even find something on the internet for an article to send home to dcps to ensure they are the good role model at home. Maybe even use examples and include the name dcm used. 
I can be passive-aggressive like that but dcm needs to be careful. Little children have big ears and big mouths and DO tell all.
Often times parents need teaching as well as children.
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Ok. First of all, I'm so sorry for her behavior. It's mean and ugly and rude.
Second, do you want to keep them? Or has she destroyed your trust?
If you want to keep them, I'd tell mom,
Susie recently said some hurtful words and while she didn't direct them towards her friends, an apology is in order.
What did Susie say that she need apologize for?
Well, she's not the one who needs to apologize, you are. She told me your nickname for me. It's mean, rude, and hurtful.
Or,
Mom, I'm unable to care for Susie any longer. She mentioned your nickname for me and I don't believe I can see you everyday without hearing the name in my mind. Im disappointed that you would refer to me that way knowing how much I do to keep her safe and happy. Our relationship is beyond repair.Comment
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Sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me.....hogwash! I am so sorry she said this about you.Comment
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I am so sorry to hear that someone would show such disrespect to you. We become such an important part of these children's lives, and it hurts me to think someone would say that in front of their child who I am sure has grown to love you.Comment
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There are no words for this. I am hurting for you! How awful a thing to say, especially in front of a child.
:hug: :hug: :hug:Comment
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If you don't want to lose dcg, I'd do one of the first 2 above. If you are considering letting her go, the 3rd one.It'd be difficult to NOT see the dcm in a different light now. I think I'd have a talk with the group, as a whole, about name-calling, how disrespectful it is, etc., etc. Maybe even find something on the internet for an article to send home to dcps to ensure they are the good role model at home. Maybe even use examples and include the name dcm used. I can be passive-aggressive like that but dcm needs to be careful. Little children have big ears and big mouths and DO tell all.
Often times parents need teaching as well as children.
I've had my share of name calling and quite often, I choose to no longer have anything to do with that person.Children are little angels, even when they are little devils.
They are also our future.Comment
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I'm sorry. I've had a similar experience.
I addressed the parent and kept the child in care.
Once I brought it up, it seems the parent was the one uncomfortable seeing me everyay. They rarely made eye contact or lingered at drop off or pick up.
I suppose it could have gone worse but I felt better because I addressed it.
:hug:Comment
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Oh my, I am so sorry. And how awful for DCG to hear such a thing from her mom, of all people
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I have a somewhat off-topic question. my English is letting me down.
what does it mean? racial slur?
I am not being sarcastic or anything, I really don't know.
I once had a child bring the j-word from daycare, and I didn't know what it was, thought he made it up... until his Mom explained to me. I think my armpit hair moved when she did. but I really didn't know, otherwise I'd nip it in the bud right then and there.Comment
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My opinion: The DCM wouldn't call you that if she respected you and had good feelings toward you. Personally, if I had heard something like that (and there is NO way that the child would have the capacity to make that up), I would be looking for a replacement for that family.
I would want send a basic term letter stating something like "I'm no longer able to care for XXX. Her last day will be XXX" and SIGN it two-ton Teri.Comment
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OP here. Thank you all for your kind words. I have decided, since this mom comes into MY home everyday, to term and explain to her why. I simply cannot be comfortable with someone who clearly disrespects me-especially in front of their child. Had the situation be reversed, I am sure this mom would be uncomfortable leaving her child with me. I run a top notch program and have no shortage of clients, as this mom had to wait 3 months before I could accept her into my care. Her snotty "mean girl" behavior just cost her child a loving, nurturing provider. I just have to wonder if this is moms resentment over the fact that her one year old recently took her first steps-away from mom and into my arms at drop off-but what can be expected when the child is in my care 60+ hours a week?Comment
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