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"Oh, they all do that sometimes when they don't feel like they had enough mommy time in the mornings. Maybe reading a book or two together, at home, before coming would help?" 
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- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.
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"She shouldn't have to go anywhere she doesnt want to"? Who is in charge here? Please remember that we are PRODUCING future adults. As adults, we do not always have a choice in whether we want to go to work, pay a mortgage/bill or get sick and still have to produce. This is a life long lesson that must begin at the earliest ages.Comment
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I have gotten this too. You could send her a text picture of her daughter having fun minutes after you leave and tell her it is all a show, just for her!Comment
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I would send a note home.Dear Parents ,As your child is having a hard time at grop offwe need a new plan.I require all children to be fed and dressed for the day.Please say your goodbyes at the door.I will take child in you may phone me when you are ready.Please do not express any negativity to me pr the program in front of your child.lETS SET THE CHILD UP FOR A HAPPY DAY.It could work and you could add that everyone would prefer to stay home if they could.Comment
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Another Side to the Same Coin
Thought I would chime in with an experience that is different from others. Fingers crossed, I am an up and coming daycare provider (waiting on closing date, inspections, etc) and have had my daughter in daycare. Also, my apologies for chiming in as "Unregistered". I made the mistake of saving my user name and password to the computer. When I got a new one, I couldn't remember login information. :\
My experience:
My daughter, normally very even-keeled, would suddenly do everything in her little 3 year old power to keep from getting dressed in the morning. She wouldn't get up out of bed, I would pick her up and she would scream and cry. She would kick her legs and not lift her arms when I tried to put her pants and shirt on. She would take forever doing any little thing she could and was making me late for work. I never did, but several times I thought about just taking her in her PJs. She told me on several occasions she didn't want to go to preschool and was unusually clingy after being fine. I mentioned a couple of times to my DCP that she kept saying she didn't want to come. I was puzzled and looking for advice, I LOVED my daycare provider! But I truly couldn't understand the change.
This happened for at least 4-6 weeks before I finally figured out what was going on. In our case, she had started playing with a little girl who turned out to be a bully. The little girl would call her names, tell her she was ugly or her clothes were ugly, snatch toys she previously didn't want to play with once my daughter was playing with them, and otherwise torment her. She was very sneaky and would do it way off in a corner with a smile on her face so the teachers wouldn't know and just thought everything was normal play. It escalated eventually to where she threw a rock at my daughter (waited until the teacher had her attention on another child). My daughter only kept saying the girl had been mean to her, but would still play with her every day. I chalked it up to normal kid interaction (not realizing all the above listed incidents had occurred). Once my daughter was able to articulate the problem to me I spoke with the director and her teacher the next day. They was wonderful and helped me solve the issue.
I mention my experience because I know you took to heart what that parent said and they way she looked at you. She is probably looking for help even if she is feeling accusatory towards you right now. If I were in her shoes, I would want to hear something along the lines of "I'm so sorry she feels that way. She usually seems so happy to be here and has a smile all day long but I will definitely keep an eye out to see if I can figure out if anything has changed. Has she mentioned anything specific to you? We can work on this together." For me, having an acknowledgement that I'm not crazy, that my daughters feelings do matter, and that my daycare provider was willing and ready to help would have been exactly what I was looking for.Comment
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Woops!
How embarrassing! I am normally a grammar queen so I beg you all to please ignore my grammar errors - I should have proofread before posting! I think I need another cup of coffee.
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It's Me Again, Margaret
Well, I figured out my login info finally. Now I can post as a registered member. Yay!Comment
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: I ALWAYS ask the Dads if at all possible before I even bring it up to the moms. Dad hasn't been 'prepped'. 
Same thing happened to me with almost 5yo not potty trained. In the SAME DAY, I asked Dad at drop off, he said it's a regular thing that he is pooping his pants, and YES they have him in a pull up. Ask Mom at pick up, he hasn't pooped his pants in WEEKS and he is in underwear everywhere but here. I then asked kid in front of Mom... got the same answer as Dad. I smiled really big and said "He needs more pullups."
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::: I ALWAYS ask the Dads if at all possible before I even bring it up to the moms. Dad hasn't been 'prepped'. Same thing happened to me with almost 5yo not potty trained. In the SAME DAY, I asked Dad at drop off, he said it's a regular thing that he is pooping his pants, and YES they have him in a pull up. Ask Mom at pick up, he hasn't pooped his pants in WEEKS and he is in underwear everywhere but here. I then asked kid in front of Mom... got the same answer as Dad. I smiled really big and said "He needs more pullups.": I find it so hilarious!! Mom was telling me that her kid was a champion sleeper, dad says she is super hard to put down. Mom tells me she will go with anyone, dad says she is shy. Mom told me that she frequently does all sorts of fun projects with him at home, dad tells me he has never held a marker before. WTF?!!
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