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I have a 3.5 yo boy who had a poop "accident" last week. I handed him his clothes and told him to get dressed after cleaning him up. He said no. So, he sat in that corner until he got dressed (he ate lunch in that corner, too!). I told him that he needed to be dressed to play with us and that as soon as he chose to put his clothes on, he could come play. He spent about 45 minutes sitting there until he decided to put his clothes on and join us again.
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I think it comes down to this - I wouldn't send a note like that. I'd talk to the parent at pick up time. I'd say something like, "Hey, can you not send X in footie jammies, he can't wear shoes for outside time." It's a pretty easy conversation to have and I don't think it requires a formal note. That's why i'd be miffed, for cripes sake, just say something, it's not that big of a deal. I think sometimes we get too caught up in the "I'm not going to do "whatever it is" because it's not how I would do it". The OP states that this is due to the child's tantrums at home, but who knows, maybe the kid just likes his PJ's? It doesn't really matter either, but a simple conversation can sometimes be more effective and less offensive than a letter.Comment
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We r at the 20 minute mark. I took the other kids away and we are watching a movie, because I am refusing to give him an audience. He thinks he will beat me at the waiting game, but I told him I have 7 more hours to wait. If we don't get outside today, every parent will know why. Of course with no names, but they all know of this boy - they can all see it too.Comment
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I've been this parent, the one with the kiddo who is dropping my kid off in PJ's, and i didn't have any desire for the DCP to change her, just put regular clothes in her bag in case of an accident. If she had sent me something like this, i'd be like, why didn't you just say something?
I think so much is lost in text form, and when we deal with parents, whose little people we are providing so much for, that there is definitely a hard line we need to keep as a business owner, but that gets a little blurry when we deal with things like this.Comment
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I commend you for receiving info by word of mouth about happenings with your child and how that would be more appropriate. But, not all clients in our child care programs are this way so many times we do the best we can choosing the best of two evils. There is NEVER a cut/dry approach to issues that arise in the daycare. Providers simply learn from experience. Every issue is trial/error and too often can't be used again due to the changing in clientale. We are renovating and I sent a letter out last month because one of my parents was griping about the mud!!!! Not a little gripe but, to the point, she wanted me to buy her new white scrubs for work. I typed a letter up that day to be given to each client about how i had been in business 20+ years and the new renovations were necessary to make my home and daycare better. They knew up front with no pretense what would be taking place over a period of months. You know what? This parent has been my best friend since because she took the hint. The parents that were NOT causing a problem just took the letter at face value but I got my point across to the "griper". HA! She even bought some muck boots to wear in my daycare and she changes when she gets back to the car:
: Bottom line,providers do the best they can as the situation arises.
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Not on the pj topic, but the letter/face to face thing.
I prefer to send letters/notes/newsletters/etc. for 2 reasons:
1. It's in writing and nobody can claim I didn't tell them.
2. I have major social anxiety with adults and having face to face conversations is really hard for me. I'd rather send a letter than have a panic attack for the rest of the evening.
On a side note, the OP said she didn't mind pj's just not footie pj's.Comment
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You also have to consider the time it takes to have this conversation. You can do it face to face, but at the times when you are face to face, it's likely that other parents are coming and going. And you wouldn't want to embarrass mom in front of other parents. That's why, sometimes, a letter/email is better. IMHO.Comment
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I chose to do it via email because pick-up/drop off times are often crazy. I also want a record of it. Dcd dropped him off almost every day last week and tells me his change of clothes are in his bag and leaves. Then at pick-up he makes a comment about how dcb is still in pajamas (we are usually playing outside at pick-up). I have been saying "yes he is" and leaving it, but his tone this am about the clothes in his bag, was more "I expect you to change him today" and the feetie pajamas felt like a powerplay move. Like I said, I don't care if he wears pajamas day in or day out, but don't expect me to do a parents job. Like someone else mentioned, if he was a baby getting up five minutes before leaving ok. If he was dropped off at 5 okay, but this kid gets here at 730.
On the plus side, dcb finally decided to get dressed after I took away his audience and he is so proud of himself by doing it independently.Comment
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What gets me is would they dare send him to school like this? The whole principle of this matter seems to be letting the 3 yo get his way all the time. Yes, some battles are too small to be fought but where do you draw the line?Comment
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I have a couple teacher moms/dads.
One of them consistently dresses in pajama pants FOR work.
I'd probably be a little less surprised if she was in her 20ies but she is 37 so.....Comment
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I know and it is only getting worse. you can't tell who is a teacher or student when you enter the school anymore::
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spot on with the paper trail! 
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