Oh Wise DC Ladies..

[MsLisa]

Alas another {silly} question...
Some of you suggest I list the "what you offer, hours, rates, meals, ages accepted, and etc"..... Should I do that on my home page or save that for the About Me?

I'm at a loss now of how my front page should look...

Do away with Upcoming Activities?

[MsLisa]

I am confused by the title of your CL ad.....i would put something clear like "Four daycare openings on the west side at Ms Lisas!"

As for the CL ad itself, your FB page link is not working for me.

I am confused why your ad is about your love of nature only. As others said, the "one-on-one care" is misleading because you do plan to take more than one child down the road if you can. Keep it brief and informative.
"Ms Lisa is located at _____. I offer care for ages ___ to ____. My business hours are ____ and my rates are _______. My daycare has an emphasis on creativity and outdoor activities. For more detailed information, visit my website at _______"
This way people can quickly see if you can, in general, meet their needs. Dont worry about people undercutting you. Decide on a rate, stick with it and make sure that parents know that you are quality care worth paying for!

I think you need to stream line your services. the intro to your web page is confusing....do you provide full time daycare? that is not clear to me. I would skip all the "babysitting service" type references because that is not really who you want to attract, right? you need more than a kid every now and then for a date night. I would have that intro paragraph be clear that you provide full/part time daycare services.

Like others said, the about us is too much. Emphasize what you can offer to the parents, period. Make sure to state your ongoing education

I like the "why choose us" but again, your rates and location are not clear. People want to see pics of your outside space and indoor playroom. Sure some people care about including sensory activities but it is definitely not the priority. They want to see that their child has a fun playroom at daycare, well light, clean, tidy, etc. They want access to your policies as well as what you do and do not supply as far as meals and diapers and such.

overall your website comes across as a bit confusing about what you offer. to me it looks like you are offering drop in, occasional sitting only. I would never guess that you have a full time established daycare.

You caught me knee deep in "OMG I NEED TO FIX THIS" land so forgive me. But you make very valid points. I'm spinning, alright OVERWHELMED with all this stuff so bear with me.

Can I steal that for my Craigslist ad?

[Sunchimes]

If debating childcare vs daycare, I suggest childcare. My first newspaper ad said daycare. I kept getting calls wanting adult daycare.

[cheerfuldom]

Alas another {silly} question...
Some of you suggest I list the "what you offer, hours, rates, meals, ages accepted, and etc"..... Should I do that on my home page or save that for the About Me?

I'm at a loss now of how my front page should look...

Do away with Upcoming Activities?

I didnt even look at upcoming activities. Why not change "why choose us" to "Information for Parents" and then each boxed section relate to services offered....rates, hours/days would be a priority! Parents also want to know about part time care, if you offer drop in, if you charge for days not attended, if you provide meals, if you provide any other supplies.

[spinnymarie]

So reading through the comments so far I can see that you've done several things which are awesome
I don't think I have anything better to ad except one:
Since you say you don't have the kids yet to take the photos, you might just use a photo of either your daughter, or, IMO a really nicely lit photo of your space would be great as well! I saw one photo of your block corner on your FB page and it looks fun! The space will be your draw, especially if you use your talent for crafts to set it up really nicely
ETA: actually, even the ones that are already on fb are great!

[MsLisa]

First I want to thank each and every one of you for taking the time to give me the amazing insight, advice, critics, & positive feedback to make this all work. I can not emphasis that enough. lovethis

So...after much sweat & tears, here is my new updated stuff!
{How did I do?}

My website

http://mslisap.wix.com/mslisa

My Craigslist Ad
{Special thanks to Cheerfuldom!}

http://scranton.craigslist.org/kid/4570187343.html

[daycarediva]

Lisa- looks GREAT! The space photos are lovely and you have really explained your program and what you have to offer parents. Looks great!


do NOT be discouraged if it takes a bit to get clients in the door. Ask friends to spread the word, put ads up at schools, pediatricians offices, the library, the YMCA or any other place you can think of. Best of luck to you!

[CedarCreek]

Lisa, your ad looks great now!

I am having trouble with your website link though, anyone else?

[melilley]

The new cl ad looks wonderful!

I'm having trouble bringing up the webpage also. It says there's an internal server error and they are working on fixing it.

[TwinKristi]

Yeah I can't see the website either. Says server error?

Personally- I think I would remove the "5 openings" part, I'm more of a sneaky deceptive advertiser and want parents to think there's only ONE spot available and you better HURRY to get it!! Limited openings or something sounds better IMO.

I didn't see if before but it looks good pic wise and such. And sometimes you have to fake it til you make it. I'm a Libra too so I SOOOO totally get the perfectionism!!

[melilley]

Yeah I can't see the website either. Says server error?

Personally- I think I would remove the "5 openings" part, I'm more of a sneaky deceptive advertiser and want parents to think there's only ONE spot available and you better HURRY to get it!! Limited openings or something sounds better IMO.

I didn't see if before but it looks good pic wise and such. And sometimes you have to fake it til you make it. I'm a Libra too so I SOOOO totally get the perfectionism!!

I had to laugh because there's a provider around here who advertised that openings fill up fast.....she advertised for months and months..

[Unregistered]

Yeah I can't see the website either. Says server error?

Personally- I think I would remove the "5 openings" part, I'm more of a sneaky deceptive advertiser and want parents to think there's only ONE spot available and you better HURRY to get it!! Limited openings or something sounds better IMO.

I didn't see if before but it looks good pic wise and such. And sometimes you have to fake it til you make it. I'm a Libra too so I SOOOO totally get the perfectionism!!

That's what I was going to say. I would not post I had five openings either!

[NightOwl]

I liked your page so I can follow you! Hope you don't mind!

[mountainside13]

I would also remove the 5 openings. It looks like you have a high turn over rate for whatever reason. Also, you may also want to try a second ad completely different from your first. The second have very very limited information. Example: one opening for 12 weeks to 5 years old in XXX city. Safe and reliable. See which one gets more responses! Post the different ads a few hours apart.

My detailed ad rarely gets responses but the limited ads I will get 8-14. I think parents just don't like to read all the information. ::

[SignMeUp]

I think parents just don't like to read all the information. ::

Agree. My brochure has quite a bit of info for people who like to read (my preferred demographic )
But I used a bold italic for key words, for those who don't read (like many parents seem to be these days - I think they are overwhelmed with wordage because of time spent on technology).
People who are hungry for details can get them, and people who just want the bare-bones version have it laid out for them ::