Do You All Go Through Mixed Emotions About Your Job All Day?

[daycarediva]

Thanks for the replies ladies...

I am really curious as provider burnout has been a really hot topic on several forums/groups I visit so being the black/white person I am, I am really trying to find the root of it.

Is it the providers who are merely making due with this job until their own kids are older?
Is it the lack of support from family members?
Is it the season? time of year?
Is it QRIS? State reg changes etc?
Is it the parenting trends?

etc, etc, etc...

It really IS a fascinating subject so thank you again for the replies....

parenting trends. First and foremost, BY FAR, trumps every other source of burnout.

I cannot imagine my former daycare provider telling me that my son smacked her in the face and turning to my son (at an age where he knows better) to comfort him and reward him with a treat for feeling sad.

I started my daycare journey with my daughter homeschooled with kidney issues/dialysis 3x/week, my own special needs preschooler (asd), my own toddler in speech therapy 3x/week and my own newborn. I added 2 little kids to the mix. I took them to therapy and dialysis, everyone was well behaved and it was NOT nearly as hard as it is now. The parents of the littles backed me up, understood how precious nap was, kept their sick kids home, disciplined their kids and had set bedtimes, etc.

Fast forward 7 years- I DO not transport kids. NOBODY here is special needs and I have 6 kids ages 2-5. It's harder. WAY WAY WAY harder.

It's crazy to long for the days of running from this appointment to that, stimming not toilet trained, non verbal preschooler with sensory issues, non verbal toddlers, and breast feeding a newborn. WAY easier than it is now.

[CraftyMom]

Thanks for the replies ladies...

I am really curious as provider burnout has been a really hot topic on several forums/groups I visit so being the black/white person I am, I am really trying to find the root of it.

Is it the providers who are merely making due with this job until their own kids are older?
Is it the lack of support from family members?
Is it the season? time of year?
Is it QRIS? State reg changes etc?
Is it the parenting trends?

etc, etc, etc...

It really IS a fascinating subject so thank you again for the replies....

For me it is ALL of the above except the just making due part. I have 3 children,ages 2.5, 6 and 13. I don't contemplate quitting, I contemplate terming. I think the biggest issues for me are children who don't mesh well but I keep them around to fill a spot and parents who give me a hard time. When I have a good group everything is great. The right families make ALL the difference! I recently went through my own "soul searching" and weighed out the pros and cons. I knew I was under way too much stress and needed to figure out why, what was the biggest factor and how can I make it better. I know I have a good thing going, just need to figure out how to de-stress. I made a sort of overhaul of my daycare from my operating hours and policies, to how much I became personally invested in certain issues. I revised my ENTIRE handbook, became even more strict with illnesses, hours of operation. I took more time off, I stopped worrying if parents were upset if I had an appt. I limited areas of my home the kids could use, I take only 5 children instead of 6 like my license says. I REALLY started putting my family first instead of just SAYING it. I started using the epay system so I'm not chasing payments and late fees are automatically added at the close of payment day. And several other stress relievers for me. My plan works, when I stick to, but it's easier said than done. I find the more I put my foot down and stick to my policies the easier it is to do tit he next time. Clear boundaries are a huge part of it. And this forum has helped my tremendously! Not having co workers or just other adults around to talk to plays a HUGE part also. Having others who actually know what I'm going through is a tremendous stress reliever!! Thanks everyone!

[Stepping]

Curious as to how many of you that posted in this thread saying you feel the same way as OP have young children of your own at home?

I am trying to make a connection to provider burnout and what common variables occur in those providers feeling that way.

Managing a family WHILE managing a child care is hard and at times I would think very overwhelming.

How many of you that posted feeling the same love-hate feelings for child care are only doing child care until your own children no longer need care and/or supervision? Do you plan on re-entering the outside work force once your children are older?

I think this is a big contributor but not the main reason. I have a two year old at home and my husband works very long hours, 6 days a week. So I do morning and evening duty on top of the 11 hours of daycare. As he works Saturadys too, that's another day of looking after the little guy by myself.

On top of that, I have 4 step children who stay with us every other weekend, so there are some weeks where I feel completely surrounded by children!

That being said, it only takes a couple of hours to myself to refresh and feel 'normal' again.

Overall, I find the biggest stress factor is the simple lack of understanding that others have for this profession. Parents and friends who barely spend more than two waking hours a day with their child, but think child care is easy!

That and the fact that my dishwasher broke a few weeks and ago and we haven't been able too afford to replace it ::

[Country Kids]

That's sort of what I was thinking....

Most (not all) provider's do this because they have young children of their own. Children they don't want to or can't afford to put in child care themselves so they stay home and do this.

So sometimes it seems that the very reason some providers do this is the same reason that stresses them out...kwim?

It's almost like a no win situation.

Cheerfuldom made a comment not too long ago about the push-pull of this job that she often struggles with wondering if it really made a difference for her kids. Being in daycare with mom and the stresses of having a home daycare in your home verses having her kids in some one else's daycare while she worked outside the home. It got me thinking about the pros and cons for some providers and their kids.

On one hand your kids are lucky they come home to you after school but at the same time, do they miss out when you have to stay at work and miss part or all of their games...kwim?

BC-did your MIL ever experince burnout or was it just your hubby that had the bad experience. When you posted your husbands thoughts I don't remember him ever saying anything about his moms feelings.

[Blackcat31]

BC-did your MIL ever experince burnout or was it just your hubby that had the bad experience. When you posted your husbands thoughts I don't remember him ever saying anything about his moms feelings.

She suffered some mental health issues but I honestly cannot say if her experiences as a provider played any role in that.

She has always been someone I've struggled to be close to/connect with.

DH's experiences are the only ones I am aware of. He only has one of four brothers still living and I've never talked to DH's dad about it.

He owned his own business too so he worked a lot of hours and days outside the 9-5.