Frustrated! Using a Fork And Spoon....Help!!

[LaLa1923]

I am very frustrated right now! I don't understand why kids that have come in and out of my care cannot use silverware?!!

I only know what my three kids did- they used spoons like pros by 15months and forks by 18 months. I used a spoon with them until they got that down and then we moved to forks.

I have a 15 month old that just stares at you! I don't get it!

I do not allow them to eat with their hands unless it's finger good, OR they are babies learning to pick things up and eat.

How do you introduce silverware? Do you allow them to eat with their hands?

[BumbleBee]

Honestly I think many parents are just lazy.

I have a 3.5 yo dcb who struggles w/silverware because they (parents) find it easier to let him use his hands then teach him how to eat like a civilized being

Likewise I have a 21 month old who expects to be spoon fed. Again, it's easier to feed him then let him figure it out and *gasp* make a mess.

I have no advice, just sympathy!

[DaycareMom]

All kids learn at different rates. Just keep working with them and let the parents know it is a skill you are working on with them.

Ask them if they are using utensils at home. I think sometimes parents don't always think of things and just do what is easy for them.

Approaching the parents will put them on the spot and bring to their attention that they need to be working on it at home too.

Good luck!

[Blackcat31]

McDonald's and Burger King foods rarely require a spoon and/or fork.

All drinks are lidded and ready for travel, foods are packaged so that silverware is no longer required, snacks are divided into portions and everything re-seals for later use

Add that to the fact that the average American family no longer sits down to a family dinner let alone at the actual dining room table so that is where the problem lies.

For my DCK's I require use of silverware. It takes ALOT of modeling and reminding but eventually they do catch on.

[daycarediva]

McDonald's and Burger King foods rarely require a spoon and/or fork.

All drinks are lidded and ready for travel, foods are packaged so that silverware is no longer required, snacks are divided into portions and everything re-seals for later use

Add that to the fact that the average American family no longer sits down to a family dinner let alone at the actual dining room table so that is where the problem lies.

For my DCK's I require use of silverware. It takes ALOT of modeling and reminding but eventually they do catch on.

I have one child (3.5) who still struggles after a year with me, and will CRY every Monday when I hand him the appropriate utensil when he is eating with his hands...the rest have it down pat.

No lids on cups here, table manners are modeled, expected and praised and we have nice meal times where EVERYTHING doesn't end up on the floor.

[BumbleBee]

McDonald's and Burger King foods rarely require a spoon and/or fork.

All drinks are lidded and ready for travel, foods are packaged so that silverware is no longer required, snacks are divided into portions and everything re-seals for later use

Add that to the fact that the average American family no longer sits down to a family dinner let alone at the actual dining room table so that is where the problem lies.

For my DCK's I require use of silverware. It takes ALOT of modeling and reminding but eventually they do catch on.

Don't forget about pouches. Chewing is becoming a forgotten art w/some kids!

[TwinKristi]

I have a 2 yr old and 21 month old who don't know how to use silverware. I try, I offer at every meal that is appropriate but they end up using their hands anyway and I'm tired of getting annoyed by them not using it. What usually happens is they hold the spoon/fork in one hand and eat with the other hand. LOL

[Cat Herder]

1. How do you introduce silverware?

2. Do you allow them to eat with their hands?

1. I give it to them with meals, snacks and center play times from 12 months on. They make awesome drumsticks and magic wands.

2. Yes. I don't teach anything during meal times. Meals are stress free.

We practice table manners during circle times and kitchen play. I had mega food issues from Food Drill Sargent's back in the day. I am more about getting the nutrients in, than how they get them there...

*** It should be noted I only keep infants and toddlers to age 4, unless a child has a disability preventing them from going to "typical" free preschool in my State.

[jenn]

Don't forget about pouches. Chewing is becoming a forgotten art w/some kids!

Exactly. I don't think most of mine need to use silverware at home, because they are eating fast food or convenient foods that don't require utensils. I have an almost 3 year old that can barely chew. She will not bite through a sandwich. She only eats bite size foods, like a beginning eater.

[dbslas]

We are struggling with the same issues here. We have 2 children (both over 2) who use their hands. I sat next to one of them today after I noticed she was not using her spoon. I scooped the rice onto her spoon and reminded her to use it to eat. She started to pick each individual grain of rice off the SPOON ::! Gah!

we are also trying to show them how they ask for more food. All of them pick up their plates or bowls into the air or wave their cups in the air and yell "more!" Slowly trying to teach them to ask for more while leaving your plates/cups down.

[slorey]

I am so glad to hear I am not alone in this struggle! It is one of my biggest annoyances at mealtime. I have a 3 year old dcg who will eat by the handful. She has no table manners at all! And, after she is done eating, if I don't clear her plate immediately she will play in all her food until she is completely covered like a 6 month old. Add to that the fact that she cannot chew like a human being and I can not even stand watching her eat! My dd, age 7 had to sit with her for lunch a few weeks ago when they had a half day of school and still talks about how disgusting it was! I just keep reminding her to use her fork. Someday she might figure it out!

[melilley]

My ds is 15 months and holds his spoon or fork, but he hasn't gotten down how to maneuver the food onto the utensil and into his mouth. I give him a utensil at every meal and show him how to use it and have been since he started eating solids, it's just taking him a while to learn how to use it and I don't see anything wrong with it. I also have another 15 mo. old who does the same.

Now, if he wasn't trying or was a few months older, then that would be a different story.

My 2 and 3 year old dck's all use their utensils.

[LaLa1923]

My ds is 15 months and holds his spoon or fork, but he hasn't gotten down how to maneuver the food onto the utensil and into his mouth. I give him a utensil at every meal and show him how to use it and have been since he started eating solids, it's just taking him a while to learn how to use it and I don't see anything wrong with it. I also have another 15 mo. old who does the same.

Now, if he wasn't trying or was a few months older, then that would be a different story.

My 2 and 3 year old dck's all use their utensils.

I don't disagree....However, they should master utensils by the time they are 18 months old. I hope this is true, but at 15 months I don't see a lot of anything happening....

[Unregistered]

I think it is unreasonable to expect a 15 month old to exclusively use utensils. My son just had a two year developmental evaluation. The occupation and physical therapist that evaluated him asked about utensils. While my 25 month old son does use them he still needs to use his hands for some foods and that's okay. Both therapists assured me that it is normal for children to not have complete dexterity with utensils until age four.

With both of my children (I have three but the littlest is only four months) I have started giving them utensils around age one. I will model for them how to use but I mostly just let them explore and figure it out. It's messy and it takes a while, but they do figure it out.

[Heidi]

I don't mind a little messy while they are learning, but I do believe that by 2, children should be grasping the idea of using a spoon or fork most of the time. By 3, eating with their fingers is a big no.

Most of you know I was born in Germany. By the time we were 3 or so, we were expected to eat "Continental style" with a fork AND knife. Our parents took us to nice restaurants, and we would greatly have regretted not behaving properly.

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