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when i get back from ds's tutoring I will tell you what happened with me.
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I agree. Your sanity is worth more. Sometimes you have to do it and it's no reflection on you.Since I had to term a crying child after keeping her nine longgggg months, I go by the "if a child has not adjusted to dc after 12 weeks they will never adjust" rule and terminate.....just can't handle the crying especially if parents aren't willing to help with the issue.
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Have the child taken to the Dr. to rule out anything medical.
Ears- Fluid in ears.Comment
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I have a child that blood curdling screams. I considered terming her, but we worked out the issues... the parents were on the same page though. That is mind scattering, and stressful to you, and the other kids. I would term her.Comment
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Well I did it. It was hard and I feel terrible but I know this was for the best. I gave her my 2 week notice and she said she will try to find someone for her to watch her tomorrow and see if her husband just wants to be done. She left without saying goodbye. I am sure she is really hurt. it was hard for me! It ****s but I do feel a huge weight lifted.Comment
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:hug::hug:lovethis
I know how hard it is to term. It really stinks. BUT you did the right thing for everyone involved.
Hopefully the parents will GET it.........Comment
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Sometimes doing the right thing doesn't feel like it and I am sure she was/is hurt but you still did the right thing.
Tomorrow I am telling my family that is doing the two week trial that I won't be enrolling on a permanent basis.
I learned a long time ago that being self-employed means I DO get to decide if something makes me happy or is doable.
I WANT to get up each morning and like my job. When it gets to the point that you are miserable or slowly going insane, you HAVE to change something.
It's okay to feel bad. Just because it was a business decision doesn't mean there weren't emotions involved.
In a few days, you will look back and be at peace with the decision you made. :hug:Comment
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Quick question. If other patents ask what happened to kids who left this abruptly how do you usually respond?Comment
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Dad called me and said they probably will not be returning for the remainder. He was surprised but seemingly not surprised at the same time if that makes sense. He said mom has not been telling him of any issues so he was inquiring a lot but did not get angry or frustrated. I got the feeling like he understood but was just blindsided since I do not see him much and therefore had not been communicatin these problems and mom had not mentioned it. I told him I had been having conversations off and on with mom about babies dependency becoming so high.
I referred him to my sons old daycare facility who might be able to offer more 1:1 with her in their nursery. I just feel so bad.Comment
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it has nothing to do with you, its the parents. I had a kid like this at that age.
after all the needs were met, all the kid did was scream. She was able body walker but all she wanted was to be carried all day.
mom and dad would give me conflicting reports like she never ever behaved like that at home but dad would be like "she just screams at home till you carry her around"
till one day the dad took her outside and she screamed and screamed that the neighbour came to see what the heck was going on. Thats when they tried to fix it.
I don't think its necessary the 1 on 1 care they need, its that they want to be carried all day long and don't know what to do.Comment
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When I termed my screamer (and thank God, I have only had one), the other parents had already been complaining, and their kids had been complaining to them. The parents were relieved and grateful when I told them that I had termed her. The other parents understand that this is my income, and were pretty supportive of my trying to give her a chance to adjust and for the parents to get help for her, but I did have one parent (of 2 of my kids) hint that she was thinking of pulling her kids because the screamer was bothering them so much. This kid screamed from drop off to pick up, and all of the other parents had witnessed it and been disturbed by it.Comment
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I think you can't train a child to be that dependent and expect other people to deal with it all day every day. I understand its easy to do and its a slippery slope but a child has to be able to adapt. If they are not adapting its because the parents aren't allowing them to achieve that important milestone. If you are going to make a child that dependent that they cant get through 5 minutes without being joined to your hip, then you should stay home with them yourself or be willing to pay dearly for 1:1 individual care for each child you have.
To expect someone caring for multiple kids to give your child undivided attention or listen to them scream because they got the message that is what life should be is just not reasonable or fair. That is just my opinion. Stay home with your children if you want them that dependent on ***you***.Comment
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I agree. My 3mo son is hugely dependent but that's because I TAKE CARE OF HIM. I don't go anywhere without him and I don't leave him with anyone other than my mother (who also holds him constantly, we're two peas in a pod
) and my DH. I ONLY do this because I know that I'm his caregiver and wouldn't dream of leaving him with someone else to deal with it. That's horrible, and I mean for the person that would have to care for him!
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I had an 18 month old crier who would only stop when held. Since that was not possible I termed them. I later found out that Mom who was home with him for the first 17 months held him constantly, all day long. He expected to be held and wouldn't get used to not being held.Comment
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