When Is It Considered Neglect

[daycare]

One of my dcks have been out for 4 days. I talked to the DCF who told me that they would be out again today. I asked what was going on, (previously they were not telling me anything, I posted about it yesterday) the DCF tells me well DCG is still running a fever and has had many bloody nose, plus cough.

I sent this child home with a fever on Monday, today is Thursday. I asked if they were going to take her to the Doctors. DCF said no, they called last week about the on-going bloody nose, but they were told that it was due to the change in the weather.

This family is nice, but they just seem to be clueless when it comes to paying attention to their child's health.

I feel really bad for the child that they have not been able to see a doctor yet and get some medication.

When is it considered Neglect for not seeking medical attention?

thanks for your help.....

[BrooklynM]

I'm not sure if it would fall under neglect since they are not in immediate danger, however, you know the child and the situation best. If you feel like there is an issue, I would maybe tell the parent that you need a doctors note before they bring the child back for your own protection.

You are obviously seeing some red flags here. Your gut may be telling you something...

[MarinaVanessa]

If they have bad medical coverage that could be a reason as to why they aren't taking their child to the Dr. Based only on the info in your OP I wouldn't take my children to the Dr's either but that is only because the biggest issue for me would be the nose bleeds but it sounds as if they called and were told not to worry.

The fevers alone wouldn't worry me unless it was super high and there was a risk of a febral seizure. I'm not one to give my children OTC medicines like fever reducers so that I could keep a close eye on their temperature and I'd just let it run it's course. If there are other symptoms that's another story, or maybe there's more that you haven't mentioned? You know that child and the family better than I do.

[daycare]

If they have bad medical coverage that could be a reason as to why they aren't taking their child to the Dr. Based only on the info in your OP I wouldn't take my children to the Dr's either but that is only because the biggest issue for me would be the nose bleeds but it sounds as if they called and were told not to worry.

The fevers alone wouldn't worry me unless it was super high and there was a risk of a febral seizure. I'm not one to give my children OTC medicines like fever reducers so that I could keep a close eye on their temperature and I'd just let it run it's course. If there are other symptoms that's another story, or maybe there's more that you haven't mentioned? You know that child and the family better than I do.

I am a worry wart. I truly care about these children. I do need to learn to let go a little, but sometimes I just can't.

A lot of the DCKS here have had really bad upper chest infections, one with severe bronchitis. The one that got bronchitis I finally told the parents child needs to go to the doctors NOW. Glad I put my foot down. The child that I posted about, the one out sick has all of the same symptoms, really bad coughing spells, fever and really bad runny nose. I guess because I am one to take my child after 2 days I don't see improvement. I know I can't expect others to be the same way.

thanks for calming me down......I hate it when all my kidos get sick like this...it really really bums me out

[TwinKristi]

What exactly can a dr do about a bloody nose and fever? I don't think that constitutes neglect by any means. Maybe their insurance is crappy and they have a share of cost or high deductible and only reserve visits for when they're absolutely necessary. Are you charging them for the days they're out?
Personally, just because a child isn't rushed into the dr doesn't mean they're being neglected. If we were approaching the weekend and my child still had a fever I would take them in but that's me as a parent. I can't force my DCPs to parent as I do.
I guess maybe you should call tomorrow and ask what next week looks like? Suggest urgent care/minute clinic?

[Cradle2crayons]

I have it in my policies that if a child misses more than 2 daycare days in a row due to illness, they are required to bring a dr note to return.

My kids school has the same policy.

I assume if they have missed that many days due to illness, they are sick enough to need a dr. Visit. Mainly to protect e ones who aren't sick yet in case it's something serious.

Also, my illness policies are a little more lenient than some so if they miss 2 days In a row, it's serious.

That being said, I don't take my kids to the dr with colds etc unless they have been sick more than 7 days with NO IMPROVEMENT. If its not a cold andthey have a high fever that's not well controlled or anything more serious going on, I may take them on it, regardless of the cost of the visit.

But IMHO, this family not taking the child to the dr doesn't at all sound like neglect on their part.

[daycare]

What exactly can a dr do about a bloody nose and fever? I don't think that constitutes neglect by any means. Maybe their insurance is crappy and they have a share of cost or high deductible and only reserve visits for when they're absolutely necessary. Are you charging them for the days they're out?
Personally, just because a child isn't rushed into the dr doesn't mean they're being neglected. If we were approaching the weekend and my child still had a fever I would take them in but that's me as a parent. I can't force my DCPs to parent as I do.
I guess maybe you should call tomorrow and ask what next week looks like? Suggest urgent care/minute clinic?

You are right, that I can't make them do what I would do. This child has had a pretty high fever since monday along with other symptoms. I know I can't be mad at them for not doing things the way that I would do it. I guess in my eyes 4 days is a long time to have a high fever.

and you are right maybe they don't have good insurance that would make it possible for them to get medical attention needed.

again thanks for calming me down. Not so sure why this is upsetting me so much

[cheerfuldom]

they called the doctor right? and the doctor did not recommend they come in and it doesnt sound like you know every detail about the fever and other symptoms. i think you are over reaching your boundaries here. they are the parents. unless it is disrupting daycare or you see signs of abuse, I think you need to let them parent as they will.

[Cradle2crayons]

I wanted to amend my previous post by saying kids are harmed by parents refusing medical care EVERY SINGLE DAY.

But here are a few situations where I would consider it neglect:::

(1) child falls and you t maybe his finger is broken. Is very visibly displaced and he is in pain. E parents refuse to take him to the dr to get it checked.

(2) the child is diagnosed with a major medical condition at requires constant follow up, but they refuse to take the child back after the initial diagnosis. Say for instance, e child has severe reflux. He screams all day every day and is in obvious discomfort, spitting up etc. or projectile vomiting and the parents refuse to take him to get him checked. It could be something serious or a medical emergency.

Things like that, that HAVE TO HAVE MEDICAL CARE TO GET BETTER, is what would constitute neglect if e child is refused medical care. Things like the common cold, fevers, cough etc are different. A lot of parents now a days don't believe in giving antibiotics and only use natural medicines. It's not neglect ey just think different.

With all that said, I know EXACTLY what you are saying. I worry about my daycare kids ALL THE TIME. Especially e ones who have parents at aren't the best.

Kudos to you for caring so much. You are awesome, just in case you don't hear it much. :hug:

[daycare]

they called the doctor right? and the doctor did not recommend they come in and it doesnt sound like you know every detail about the fever and other symptoms. i think you are over reaching your boundaries here. they are the parents. unless it is disrupting daycare or you see signs of abuse, I think you need to let them parent as they will.

well just punch me in the tummy.... totally joking you are right. I need to chill out and stop worrying so much. I know that other things have occurred in the past with this family that they did not seek medical attention in time and the child ended up with a serious health issue that ended in emergency surgery. Needless to say they kept writing it off last time (this was about 5 months ago) and I guess I am just hoping that it does not happen again. But there is nothing that I can do to change their decision, after all it is their choice to seek medical attention or not...

As for seeking medical advise, they did over a week ago but at that time the child only had a bloody nose. Now he has bloody nose still and other symptoms, not sure if that means anything or not, but I need to stop worrying...

Thanks for saying it straight....I think I need to hear the real truth to wake up sometimes...

Hugs........daycare

[daycare]

I wanted to amend my previous post by saying kids are harmed by parents refusing medical care EVERY SINGLE DAY.

But here are a few situations where I would consider it neglect:::

(1) child falls and you t maybe his finger is broken. Is very visibly displaced and he is in pain. E parents refuse to take him to the dr to get it checked.

(2) the child is diagnosed with a major medical condition at requires constant follow up, but they refuse to take the child back after the initial diagnosis. Say for instance, e child has severe reflux. He screams all day every day and is in obvious discomfort, spitting up etc. or projectile vomiting and the parents refuse to take him to get him checked. It could be something serious or a medical emergency.

Things like that, that HAVE TO HAVE MEDICAL CARE TO GET BETTER, is what would constitute neglect if e child is refused medical care. Things like the common cold, fevers, cough etc are different. A lot of parents now a days don't believe in giving antibiotics and only use natural medicines. It's not neglect ey just think different.

With all that said, I know EXACTLY what you are saying. I worry about my daycare kids ALL THE TIME. Especially e ones who have parents at aren't the best.

Kudos to you for caring so much. You are awesome, just in case you don't hear it much. :hug:

thanks C2C.... I do love this kid. She's my little peanut.

Thank you for clarifying the term for me. My assistant put that into my head this morning when he asked me where she was and I said oh she is still out sick with fever and he about lost it........He loves her just as much as I do, I can tell by his reaction to me this morning.

[Cradle2crayons]

thanks C2C.... I do love this kid. She's my little peanut.

Thank you for clarifying the term for me. My assistant put that into my head this morning when he asked me where she was and I said oh she is still out sick with fever and he about lost it........He loves her just as much as I do, I can tell by his reaction to me this morning.

And if you didn't give a crud how many days she was gone I'd be a little alarmed . I'm the same way, especially with my special dcg. People think I'm nuts when she's in the hospital that I go and spend the night with her (if my husband is home) because her mom can't take off of work when she's in the hospital. But I wouldn't do it any other way.

Taking care of these kids does take a huge emotional toll on us, especially when it seems like their parents aren't caring for them like we would.

Bt it's what makes us human. Hopefully she'll be back in care soon!!

[TwinKristi]

I don't mean this against you OP but just a general observation I see on here. Most providers come on here to complain about a child coming to DC sick when they should be home, perhaps not even allowing readmission with a dr's note, then there's this side that worries about neglect if they don't see a child for 4 days and they're still sick. It's just funny now the spectrum works. I've had 2 families who kept their child home for 4+ days when they were sick, paid, but another who has to be forced to get their child and take them to the dr when they're sick.

[daycare]

And if you didn't give a crud how many days she was gone I'd be a little alarmed . I'm the same way, especially with my special dcg. People think I'm nuts when she's in the hospital that I go and spend the night with her (if my husband is home) because her mom can't take off of work when she's in the hospital. But I wouldn't do it any other way.

Taking care of these kids does take a huge emotional toll on us, especially when it seems like their parents aren't caring for them like we would.

Bt it's what makes us human. Hopefully she'll be back in care soon!!

thanks again.......this dcg does have good parents, but they are much more relaxed I guess and often are cluess. Like the time time dcm tried to convince me that she is allergic to the wind and on Friday's she can't have milk because by the end of the week she has built up an immunity to it.....

oh well, I am going to keep my fingers crossed and hope that she gets well soon....

[MarinaVanessa]

I am a worry wart. I truly care about these children. I do need to learn to let go a little, but sometimes I just can't.

A lot of the DCKS here have had really bad upper chest infections, one with severe bronchitis. The one that got bronchitis I finally told the parents child needs to go to the doctors NOW. Glad I put my foot down. The child that I posted about, the one out sick has all of the same symptoms, really bad coughing spells, fever and really bad runny nose. I guess because I am one to take my child after 2 days I don't see improvement. I know I can't expect others to be the same way.

thanks for calming me down......I hate it when all my kidos get sick like this...it really really bums me out

Well knowing that other DCK'd have come down with severe respiratory issues then I can see why you're so worried. Makes sense now. :hug: