How Do You Deal With Constant Arguing

[kelsey's kids]

My group during the day consists of a 4, 3 and, 2 year old boys who are constantly arguing. I am at my wits end. This has been going on for weeks now and I am not sure what else to do. I have tried time out separate play areas ect. And nothing has worked. They do this during teacher lead activities by trying to out do each other over answers or whatnot. But it is at its worst during free play. We can't go 5 minutes without an argument. Any suggestions... besides all day nap

[Memc2001]

Great question! I have one boy who has such a temper it seems to be the common denominator but he is not always entirely to blame. I don't know how to redirect the anger/stop the fight anymore.

[kelsey's kids]

That is the problem here it just seems to never end

[WImom]

I have that problem too. Hopefully someone has some good advice for us.

[Bookworm]

I constantly separate. My DCKs are 4 but as soon as I hear the arguing, I immediately separate them. For my class, this is the worst thing possible. They are slowly learning to work things out between themselves.

[Nebula]

Try the get along shirt.....

[coolconfidentme]

I use to have bickering, but I changed the type of books I read at story time. We are currently reading the Building Christian Character series by Michael P Waite. They aren't religious, just teaches values. Sharing, fairness, overcoming jealousy, being thankful, that sort of stuff. The kids love them because they rhyme & have odd characters in every book.

I also now have a rewards chart & it you don't get timeout, you get a sticker to take home & one for the chart. If you get a sticker everyday, you get a medal. (I'm a runner & they lover my medals.)

So far it is help out a lot.

[kelsey's kids]

Try the get along shirt.....

I have done were the hold hands for 10 minutes and that just lead to them tugging on each others hands

[kelsey's kids]

I use to have bickering, but I changed the type of books I read at story time. We are currently reading the Building Christian Character series by Michael P Waite. They aren't religious, just teaches values. Sharing, fairness, overcoming jealousy, being thankful, that sort of stuff. The kids love them because they rhyme & have odd characters in every book.

I also now have a rewards chart & it you don't get timeout, you get a sticker to take home & one for the chart. If you get a sticker everyday, you get a medal. (I'm a runner & they lover my medals.)

So far it is help out a lot.

I also do not do this if you listen and are good all day you get a sticker and when your chart is filled up you get to pick a treasure out of the treasure box. These little boys haven't had a sticker in weeks.

[cheerfuldom]

I would never have kids share a t shirt or force kids to hold hands...I think that is really disrespectful to force kids to be close physically or hold hands. I guess that's a debate for another time

anywho, how much time are you spending outside? I find a lot of the fighting and arguing is due to bored kids. I try to get the kids outside two to three hours a day.

[My3cents]

I would never have kids share a t shirt or force kids to hold hands...I think that is really disrespectful to force kids to be close physically or hold hands. I guess that's a debate for another time

anywho, how much time are you spending outside? I find a lot of the fighting and arguing is due to bored kids. I try to get the kids outside two to three hours a day.

I agree with you on everything except bored kids..... I don't feel kids should be entertained 24/7 esp if they are in a world totally geared towards them. I do agree with plenty of outside time for boys to burn off energy. I don't like the t-shirt either or the hold hands. Last thing I would want to do do if I were a kid or even as an adult is hold hands with someone that was bugging the poo out of me. I would want a break from that child and be able to come back to being friends on my own. I get the idea of it, but not what I would do.

[butterfly]

is it something that could be removed? For example, if they are argueing over what color a toy is... remove the toy. If they are argueing over a book... remove the book.

Typically, I can get kids to get along once they see they will loose priviledges if they can't get along.

I also frequently say "use kind words". Even my littles now say "no thank you" when they don't want to be bothered by someone else.

and :hug: to you! I do like the all day nap idea though.

[Tdhmom]

I have 3 girls and 3 boys. We spend a ton of time outside because when winter comes we are stuck inside ALL DAY! So we make up for it during the nicer months. But before we go outside I explain to them what I expect from everyone or we come back inside until it's time for preschool. I designate the swings (so the 2 kids that get them first and everyone has to wait their turn after that) no throwing ANYTHING, no fighting, and hands and feet to ourselves. It doesn't always work but I think it gives them a better idea of things that we shouldn't be doing.

Nothing worse than playing referee all day!!! I feel like that most days. That's when I seperate the age groups and even that doesn't help some days!

[cheerfuldom]

I agree with you on everything except bored kids..... I don't feel kids should be entertained 24/7 esp if they are in a world totally geared towards them. I do agree with plenty of outside time for boys to burn off energy. I don't like the t-shirt either or the hold hands. Last thing I would want to do do if I were a kid or even as an adult is hold hands with someone that was bugging the poo out of me. I would want a break from that child and be able to come back to being friends on my own. I get the idea of it, but not what I would do.

maybe bored wasnt the right word since I dont entertain kids either. but outdoor time is SOOOO important and having your day broken up so they arent in one room for hours and hours at a time is important. it is also important to challenge kids with new experiences and opportunities to use their creativity.

[Sarah97]

One thing that I do that works (most of the time) for my group is to have the kids who are arguing take a break and sit down at the table to work it out. I tell them to talk it out using nice words and when they are done to come and tell me what they have decided.

"Seems like we have a problem, I need you two to sit down here at the table and figure out what you can do to figure this out. I want you to use kind words and when you are done come and let me know. I will check on you in a bit to see if you need some help."

If there is no success after a bit I will ask them if they need any ideas - like they may need to decide who will have it first and who will have it next and for how long, or maybe they will decide that neither of them will play with the item. Sometimes they come up with some crazy solutions!

edited... well my answer is if they are arguing about items/sharing. If they are just arguing in general, I'm lost! Sorry!