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I agree about the grammar as well. All I've ever known are examples in spanish but now I have a couple of English examples too.
Here is my favorite example of all time of the importance of punctuation (in spanish)
Mi papá tiene 57 años = my dad is 57 years old
Mi papa tiene 57 anos = my potato has 57 [bleep]holesComment
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: This thread!
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I also do private nanny/babysitting (I do all trades) ironically, what started out as just having a few toys if clients wanted to bring their children here, has become a full time business
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Maybe the ad was to prove to her husband and/or MIL that she must stay home and not work.
*After all, even the WAHM's (like home childcare providers), who *are* home, can't do all that their DD needs to grow up as the special snowflake she is.
- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.
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True....this is one of the weapons in a woman's arsenal. The "well, I tried" technique...
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You know the more that I think about the ad itself the more that I agree with Leanna. I don't think that any of her requests are unreasonable, it will just be difficult to find a DC that has everything on her wishlist and she will have to decide which ones are non-negotiables and which she can bend on. Also for some of her quilifications she will have to be willing to pay at the higher end of child care rates for group care. I mean really:
-In-home daycare with a small number of children. Unless she means one or two children max, all small FCC homes like those of use that have 6-8 maximum number of kids can be considered a "small number of children"
-Part-time two half days and one full day. Okay, not altogether that difficult if on a regular basis, sounds like PT care to me
-Experience and education in child care preferred ,CPR and First Aid training,licensed, references. Many of us are experienced, okay no problem there. Education ... I'm sure many of us have taken some sort of child development class or workshop and if not she said preferred, not that it was a requirement. CPR and First Aid .. that's a requirement in my state so no problem there. She wants Licensed, also not a horrible requirement. References, yes okay that's smart and very recommended.
-Breakfast and lunch given including healthy meals (little to no processed food, no sugary snacks or drinks, fruits and vegetables given frequently, not a lot of pasta, bread, and things of the sort given frequently). We can pack her a lunch if necessary. Okay most of us provide meals that are healthy and based on the food program guidelines which includes no sugary snacks or drinks and servings of fruit and veggies so no problem there. Very reasonable. As far as not having frequent pasta and bread I think as long as she understands that the healthy meals that are served are based on the food program and meet dietary guidelines of the recommended foods and protion for each child I'm sure that she will be fine with that. Sounds to me like she just wants balanced meals. It's not like she's asking for home-grown organic foods.
-No yelling, no spanking or other physical punishment, no shaming, no time outs to be in line with our gentle parenting We shouldn't be yelling anyway, and no spanking of course, shaming is deffinetely out of the question (it's emotional abuse after all) and no time outs ... I personally find time out ineffective anyway and don't do them so I don't find this shocking. I find that redirection, talking it out and prevention works better than time out anyway so not a huge deal here.
-Absolutely NO crying-it-out at nap times or any other time. She does well going to sleep on a cot while being patted for a few minutes. Depending on the age of the child CIO isn't recommended for kids under 1yo anyway and in all honesty if the child is older than that and cries before naptime a good 'ol back patting or rubbing is not being unreasonable. Child will transition eventually and grow older and not need this after some time.
-Little to no television, fun activities, learning through play, arts and crafts, out door play, etc. Definitely nothing ridiculous here. SOunds like my program.
-No harsh disinfectants and cleaning products like bleach. Somewhat harder to fulfill since in my area bleach is what is recommended but perhaps asking the parent what they use at home to disinfect isn't unreasonable. As long as it sanitizes right? If licensing requires bleach then explaining that licensed care cannot accommodate that should be enough. Either that or she can find license exempt child care. Here is one that she will have to decide what is more important = no bleach or licensed care.
-A clean, no smoking and as fragrance-free of a home as possible (we prefer no scented candles, scented plug-ins, fabreeze, heavy perfume, etc.). Obviously we all need to stay clean and not smoke around the kids. Not everyone smokes so finding a smoke free home isn't that hard to find, my home is one in fact. fragrance free just sounds like she wants an eco-friendly child care. Not that difficult to do but more common in larger cities vs smaller cities/towns. She also says that fragrance free "as possible" not that it's a requirement. I already do this as well (I use natural essential oils for fragrance)
Most importantly we need someone who loves children and is passionate about them. Nothing out of the ordinary here.We would want someone who is patient and understanding with a big heart and can run their daycare without taking out their stresses on the children. I don't find anything outlandish here either.
The above is the ad.
I talked to this mom and she had further requirements as well. (I did not respond to this ad, she contacted me before posting)
-She does not guarantee a drop off time. She wants a 45 min. window of drop off depending on when her daughter gets up (okay, but I wouldn't be able to guarantee that I would be home but I would be fine with her calling/texting me to see where I was and dropping the child off where I was on the off chance that we were on a walk or at the park) and also wants breakfast whenever they show up This would be a no-no for me and I would stress the importance of a routine and schedule for children. I serve meals when I serve them and if they miss out then they miss out but another meal is soon to come ... I serve meals and snacks every 2 hours).
-She wants someone willing to do prolonged rocking or whatever it takes to get her daughter thru nap with no crying and also, whatever attention is needed to avoid crying during the day I'd give her a heap load of information by child professionals ... many Pro AP parenting ... about how crying is a part of child development and healthy and explain the methods that I use to give the children the tools they need in order to work out frustrations and prevent/handle crying)
AND she said her current provider decided to close down her daycare. gee, I wonder why? I think the "can run their daycare without taking out their stresses on the children" shows what she really thinks of her current provider.
As far as this ... well I don't know why the DC provider closed her daycare down but if it were because of this DCP only then it would make sense to term the client, not close the whole DC down KWIM? The provider could have just reached the end of her patience and career and that's why she closed down. That would make sense to me as far as the DCP's comment.
All in all the only conflict that I see is
the bleach
the rocking
and the feeding whenever the client shows up
Everything else seems pretty normal to me even though I may or may not be able to provide a completely eco-friendly atmosphere for her, if this DCM called me and couldn't let go on the bleach (or didn't have an alternative solution for me, the rocking (which I would not be willing to do for a child that was not an infant) or the feeding when they showed up I'd be able to refer her to 3 DCP's that probably wouldn't mind this type of client.
I told her I didnt think I would be a good fitComment
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I would be worried that if she were that picky at the very beginning that other issues would come up. Unless she's more flexible than the ad sounds, and the ad is just her "perfect world" wishes. But if she's not flexible then I agree that she'd probably be happier with a nanny.Comment
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I see what you are saying Marina. My point was that she wanted A LOT. yes most if not all is reasonable if you are taking care of your own child or willing to pay a higher rate for nanny care. I talked to this person. She was not budging on her list and in the course of a half dozen emails, she added even more to the list. She also said more about her previous provider which lead me to believe that the provider is not shutting down/closing, but actually what she is doing is downsizing....which may be a nice way of the previous provider to term this mom without terming. Again, that is just a guess but I would be surprised if I was wrong.
and some of it was about the way she was saying things, not necessarily the actual thing. we discussed the fragrance and cleaning issues for instance and her attitude was very demanding. i myself have a fragrance free home and make all of my own cleaning products, no bleach but I didnt have a problem with what she was saying so much as how she was saying it. She mentioned "no crying" in every email.....Comment
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UPDATE!
hey all, guess what? this mom facebooked me and has had no other options come up for daycare, surprise surprise. she wants to renew our old convo about daycare but I politely reminded her of what I said before. I wouldnt be the right fit for her based on our previous conversations. She said she has tried so many places and talked to so many people....and is still looking.
anyway, just between all of us, even if she was willing to budge on her list, I am still not going to take her because I was not good enough for her a week ago so I already know that even if they started here, she would feel that I wasnt good enough.
ANOTHER UPDATE
I popped over to her Facebook page and now I think I will look at other prospective parents on Facebook too to weed out people! LOL She is married, has one kid, is a SAHM yet says several places that daycare provides her "me time". She told me her daughter only needed a little patting to go to sleep but on her FB she said her daughter just started sleeping thru the night (almost 2 years old), screams bloody murder when its time to go to bed or nap, wakes up horribly grouchy. she also said in several places that their family is a child-led family. sounds delightful LOL I am confused why she is so AP style with no sleep training and other things like that yet sends her kid to daycare when she is a SAHM? they dont cloth diaper, cosleep, or babywear but she is very big on posting about no cry it out with articles and snarky comments like "I dont care how other people parent but I do care that other parents are un-informed" so yeah, the crying thing is obviously a biggie. She also talks about how much TV they which (sounds like a lot of TV) yet wants a daycare that limits or does no TV at all. its seriously not adding up at all. so glad I dodged that bullet!Comment
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