Do Families Really Need To Incomes?

[MrsSteinel'sHouse]

We lived on my income (childcare) and dh had a part time job for part of the time when he went back to school at 38 total income for that time period was $14,000 a year. We lived. We do have a mortgage. But, a lot of things just didn't happen. Thankfully God watched over us. When he finally had a decent job I stopped doing childcare. I was off a year, it was tight, no extras. Then my dd got accepted to the college of her dreams. I started doing childcare again to pay for her (she has decent financial aid but there is still a decent amount to pay). I do totally appreciate that year! Totally reorganized my life. In all actuality, I missed my little ones.

In today's society most people believe they must have 2 cars, cell phones, dish etc. We did live without all of those things for years. You can adjust to being a one income family but you have to adjust the "needs". Ok now you have me thinking what can we cut again...

[HomeMADE]

I do think that there is all type of scenarios that create a need for two incomes. I do believe that most all of them are a choice. It maybe poor financial choices or conscious decisions knowing that it would take two incomes to support and maintain that type of lifestyle. My husband and I were the later of the two scenarios; we made choices knowing that it took two incomes to support the lifestyle. But with a little planning and hard work we made a switch when I was surprised with baby number three.

For two years I worked two jobs along with him. We paid off our cars and started budgeting instead of spending. We began to live below our means and stopped acquiring STUFF. Reduced vacations and cut out a ton to extracurricular activities for us. What we found was that we were spending more quality time at home and really enjoying our house and children on a whole different level. We were finally having fun.

But I was now home with two children born 14mo apart (surprise baby #4), no real adult interaction, no extra funds for “Mom Fun”, and found that we were getting in a rut as a couple. The decision to open the home daycare was to allow me to have the best of both worlds. Not to mention owning our own business, whoohoo, we win.

So while my income is not needed to keep the household running it is doing much more it is giving me purpose. We are being smart with the extra income though, saving, paying off student loans (our only debt other than our home), and doing some much needed updating to our forever home.

[Country Kids]

[COLOR="red"]"I am confused by the statement that sending your child to public school is not cheap as it is public so why would it be so expensive?"[/COLOR]

Our schools charge for everything here beginning in elementary school.

School supplies ($30 including everything for projects throughout the year)
Then they have to buy a planner (5.00)
My son and I are going on a field trip ($70.00)
Then there are things here and there throughout the year that they need money for school.

Middle school-

ASB fee-$17
Towel fee-$5
To take art class-$10
Then we did buy an annual-$20
Two field trips-$50
Schools supplies-$50 (with everything we have put into supplies throughout the year)


Grand total-$102

All of the electives charge-$10 to take them yet you have to take two of them a semester

Then they charge $25 dollars for pe uniform but we were able to skip and just always use a white shirt/black shorts

Then there is another $10 for the PSA.

Sports is $125

HighSchool:

Registration: $15
Elective:$10
Athletic Pass:Students get into all games free-$12:00
Then we did buy the yearbook-$55.00
School Supplies: ($50.00 because of projects throughout the year)
One field trip: $25

Grand total: $148.50

Sports are $150 also

Alot of the electives have a $10 fee so you could easily rack up $50 in just electives.

Also, at the high school alot of times you have to check you text books out of the library for homework/studying for tests/etc. Sometimes kids try and just buy them on Amazon.

Grand total= $355.50 Roughly $120 per child for public school

Last year it was more as we had two in high school and we seemed to have all sorts of fees for the senior for classes and such. Then they charge for all the tests that seniors take and AP classes.

This is just our personal family. This year it will be also different because we will have one in middle school/two in highschool so it could even be more depending on what classes they have to take.

[spud912]

There are way too many variables to answer that question properly.

• What is the income of the primary worker?
• How many dependents rely on the primary worker?
• What is the cost of living for the bare essentials?
• What other expenses are "essential" for the household?
• Are there additional expenses?

For example, if you are a single parent with one child, the cost of living is very low and the family is extremely frugal, you may be able to get by with working a minimum wage job (or close) and no second source of income.

On the other hand, if there is a family of 6 living in an area with an extremely high cost of living (New York or California for instance), one parent is self employed and requires a Blackberry and home internet access for their business and the schools in the area are poor enough that the family feels it is in the children's best interest for them to attend a private school, living off a single income may not be possible.

We personally need a second income because our bills exceed my husband's income. We need the second income to cover the remaining bills, food and incidentals.

[spud912]

On another note, has anyone noticed that most cell phone companies are removing basic plans from their options? Many companies only have data plans now (and if you have 2 lines then it would be cheaper to get a family line). That automatically puts the bill at over $100 for most cell phone companies .

[Crazy8]

IMO in most cases (lor at least in my case) no, it is not necessary. I say this as a mom whose husband DOES NOT by any way shape or form bring in a huge income & yet we are able to get by (scrape by I should say). To me it was important to be home with my kids, more important than having the latest technology, new furniture, a newer car, taking fancy vacations, etc. We do live in the midwest which is a LCOL area so that helps. And I do not have luxury items. Part of the reason why I do daycare is so we can help make ends meet but to take on 5-6 kids for daycare was never part of my plan b/c it defeats the purpose of me being home. That is why I usually only have 2-3 DC kids - it is enough for me to help with groceries & pay for incidentals (kids' sports fees, etc). So I guess there are a ton of factors as to why some families need 2 incomes but if I totally stopped doin daycare we would survive but just barely. We just choose to live below our means in most cases (or try to)! Our vehicles are paid for & are 10 & 8 years old & we will not replace unless one dies completely. I think sometimes people take on extra debt & then have to earn the $$$ to pay for what they think they need which in some cases are non-essential items.

I am a little confused by your response, you ARE a 2 income family by doing daycare, regardless of how many kids you take, yet in one breathe you are saying no, you don't need 2 incomes and in another saying you'd barely survive without your income. So, essentially, isn't your answer yes, you need to be a 2 income family even though you are frugal????

[MNMum]

As someone who grew up in a single parent home that recieved little but some child support- yes two incomes would make things easier when it comes to paying the bills, having healthy meals, and finding productive things to do together as a family. But it also depends on the family and the jobs, some families can afford for one partner to stay home and one to work, and some families need both partners to work. My fiance says that with what he is studying to do I wouldn't even need to work if I didn't want to but I cannot picture myself not working at all- espicually because he just got a summer paid internship and they are pretty much grooming him for a manager position and may offer him a job after graduation. I think that is because I grew up in a single parent home so there is a part of me that knows things happen and its better to be prepared for hard times or to have a back up plan. Prepare for the worst but hope for the best.

I think I am in your same position. I grew up in a single family home with 2 siblings. We could get by on my husband's income, but I'm not comfortable with what we would do if something happened to him. We actually have income coming in from each of our fulltime jobs, plus 3 parttime jobs. If we could build up our savings - both liquid and long term, I would consider quitting my day job, but that won't happen for some time.

[Play Care]

What if something happens to the "bread winning" spouse? Death, divorce, separation, loss of job, etc. are all things that need to be considered. It is not easy to just "pop" back in to the work force - even those with advanced degrees need to brush up on their skill sets, which may mean shelling out more money at a time when you are trying to cut back.

I think it's simplistic to say that people *could* live on one income if they choose to. One of my dc families, dad was let go from his job (he's an accountant!) and was out of work for over six months. Their kids are young, and I know mom didn't want to go back to work after the youngest was born - she had even gone to PT. I know as time went on things would have gotten desperate, especially since mom was coming off maternity leaves and they had probably already were low in savings. I know they were very thankful mom was earning.

I love having my income and knowing that if something were to happen to DH that we would have some type of cushion.

[Kaddidle Care]

I have noticed that a lot of families live above their means & are always trying to keep up with the Joneses so they are strapped for cash. Then maybe a pay raise comes along-so they buy even bigger houses, better cars and they are STILL living above their means...Many people don't seem to know the difference between a want and a need...Spend $ they don't have, too much credit card debt, etc.

What she said. ^

I stayed home with my children until they reached 1st Grade and then got a part time job while they were at school. It was a total of 12 years because my children were 10 years apart and I estimate it COST us approximately $10,000.00 per year for me to stay home. I did things here and there to defray the costs - did Direct sales at night for several years, did some Childcare.

I see many people crying "We HAVE to both work" to their parents and the parents raise their children while they go off to work. While there are Grandparents that truly love spending time with their grandchildren, they are ****ers in my opinion to take them on full time. :: (Unless, of course they did the same thing with their own children and this is their first chance to actually raise a child.)

We live frugally - cut coupons, don't take vacations, rarely go out to eat. (My break from cooking is usually Pizza once a week and on rare occasions Chinese Take out.) I used to cut the kids hair myself, I've never had a manicure, I get hair cuts about 2-3 times a year - just make sure it's a style that will be simple and not go out of shape quickly. I dye my own hair and trust me - put that off forever.

We've made some mistakes and are paying for it financially but I don't regret the time spent at home with my kids. It breaks my heart to see folks rushing back to work and missing so much of their children's lives all for the allmighty buck ($). But it's their CHOICE, not need.

The one exception is if there is a horrific illness or disability that has set someone back financially. But I draw the line when they say Obesity is a Disability.

[Mom&Provider]

Perhaps if my hubby was in his previous position (he got laid off) we could get away with not having two incomes for a short period, but in his current position I HAVE to work to make ends meet.

I think it all depends on what the *bread winner* of the family actually makes. I'm sure there are some who could afford to not work, but choose too, but my guess is that many more need to work to make ends meet.

[Kaddidle Care]

Life is full of choices.

We Choose whether to go to College so that we can hopefully get a good paying job - or not.

We Choose the jobs we take whether they pay a lot - or not.

We Choose to stay home with our kids - or not.

Sometimes we let others choose for us but ultimately it is our choice.

I've been fortunate enough to have my last 2 jobs fall into my lap. Both jobs have been willing to work around my child's school schedule, both have been working for a Non-Profit Church. I kind of feel that while I made the choice, the big man upstairs is leading the way.

To paraphrase from JK Rolling.. ""It is our choices, (Harry), that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."

[allsmiles]

its extremely rare here to find families with one income and none of us are living lavishly either..
i worked for the government for most of my life and my income as average i would say.. my husband made the same. last year was the FIRST time i took my kids on vacay.. we only go shopping if something is worn out of we dont have something we need.. i would love to keep up with the Jones' but i cant cuz heck, i barely have much money after paying bills and no credit card..
i too had my tubes tied after 2 children because i knew i could not provide for more than that.. i totally agree with others, this question just depends on where you are.. the few familes i do know where mom doesnt work are the ones in the lavish homes and cars so i dont think they are following these rules of minimalism LOL.. but great for those that can.. i would LOOOOVVVVEE it!!

[MarinaVanessa]

Life is full of choices.

We Choose whether to go to College so that we can hopefully get a good paying job - or not.

We Choose the jobs we take whether they pay a lot - or not.

We Choose to stay home with our kids - or not.

Sometimes we let others choose for us but ultimately it is our choice.

I've been fortunate enough to have my last 2 jobs fall into my lap. Both jobs have been willing to work around my child's school schedule, both have been working for a Non-Profit Church. I kind of feel that while I made the choice, the big man upstairs is leading the way.

To paraphrase from JK Rolling.. ""It is our choices, (Harry), that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities."

I can agree with this. After reviewing our financial statements and budget I found that we could definitively cut out a lot more unneeded things than I originally thought. If we cut these all out and made these payments towards our debt we could downsize our home and live in a different part of town (or city) and live off of one income.

We CHOOSE to have Direct TV
We CHOOSE to have internet
We CHOOSE to have 3 kids
We CHOOSE enroll our kids in extra curricular activities (sports, gymnastics etc)
We CHOOSE to go out to dinner for date night/double dates
We CHOOSE to go on vacations
We CHOOSE to live in the city that we live in
We CHOOSE to live in the part of the city that we live in
We CHOOSE to live in the size home that we live in
MY DH CHOOSES to have flat screens in all rooms
MY DH CHOOSES to have 2 cars (all newer cars) and therefore 2 car payments
MY DH CHOOSES to go out with his buddies for guy's night every other week.
MY DH CHOOSES to buy expensive toys for our kids
I CHOOSE to allow him to spend his spare money any way he wants to
Etc.

There are definitely more places that my family could cut out expenses in order to live off of one income, we CHOOSE not to.

[mema]

I think we could make it on one, we have before. But in my area that would require moving to another part of town. We moved from there a few years ago and I WILL NOT go back. Neighbors dealing in the garage next door, shootings around the corner and the shooter running thru our backyards, late/middle of the night knocks on my door from who knows, etc. I would rather that both of us work and we stay where we are. Do we "need" everything we have....no. I could go without-can dh? Probably not. He has some issues with giving things up. I wish he could give up certain things, especially right now, but, yeah, not a fight I want right now.

[Sugar Magnolia]

If people/families could survive on one income, we would all be out of business. Am I right?