Do Families Really Need To Incomes?

[CedarCreek]

For my family, yes. Separately, our incomes are sad. Together, we are one decent income. ::

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

Most? No.

I can support myself and my kids on my income. I'm frugal. But, had I wanted to be a stay-at-home-mom (which I would LOVE!) I wouldn't have been able to. My STBX-husband only made enough to support us when we lived somewhere that made our monthly bill totals $1500/month.
Having a smaller home would not have lowered our bills by anything. The only debt I have now is my mortgage.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

In my area I would say no. Really depends on the lifestyle you wish to live and location you live in I think. What are wants and what are needs? We use thrift shops, coupons, shop on sale, really watch what we buy in general. Can you get by with one car ( a used not fancy one) or even no car? Freeze in season foods. No TV. No yearly vacations away. Drive through coffee everyday. Make food & eat @ home. No Smart phones or whatever the latest gadget is. Many things that have become routine or habit appear as needs to many people. Without the extras I'm certain many in my area could have one parent at home. Just think of the savings of not paying daycare alone! Then again I would be out of a job As a single parent I love that I can be at home and bring in enough income to get by. We certainly have more than enough to get by on comfortably, but not living large by any means.

I thrift shop, coupon, shop on sale, watch what I buy, have a paid off car, don't have cable, vacation at my parent's lake house ($30 in gas total), don't order beverages or good out, always eat at home (unless my parents are treating us), no smart phone, no fru-fru gadgets ... and that's how I get by. happyface

[Blackcat31]

For me personally, yes. We could live on one income.

My DH and I own our home/40 acres and our vehicles. We have boats, snowmobiles, and other toys...all paid for in cash.

The only bills we have is the mortgage on the daycare house and our day to day living expenses.

We have no credit cards and no debt.

How? Did we win the lottery? Come into a large sum of money? Have rich parents or long lost family members?

Nope.

We simply went without for many many years. We worked hard to save and scrimp for the things we felt we important. We took family trips/vacations and activities that were free or very low cost.

We never applied for a credit card ever and never ever bought any type of toy or something fun unless we had the cash to pay for it in full.

In my personal opinion, it CAN be done.

It just depends on how bad you want to do it and how many things you want to live without....an if that meant moving to a part of the country that allowed us to do things in the way we did, I would have moved if necessary.

[Willow]

*NEED* two incomes?

No.

But most Americans struggle with the true definition of that word now days and would probably argue otherwise....

[Play Care]

I don't know about anyone else - I know my family needs both my and DH's income to help put food on the table and keep the roof over our heads. Do we have what others would consider "extras?" I'm sure. But most of our income goes into retirement, college savings and investments/savings. There are many elderly women in poverty because they left the workforce to stay home with the kids only to find out that their husband's pensions died off with them.

FWIW my mother was a SAHM even though my father's salary was not enough to support us. I remember periods of not having enough food, or proper fitting clothing, having the phone shut off frequently, etc. I would have loved if she had gone off to work, even PT.

[Country Kids]

For me personally, yes. We could live on one income.

My DH and I own our home/40 acres and our vehicles. We have boats, snowmobiles, and other toys...all paid for in cash.

The only bills we have is the mortgage on the daycare house and our day to day living expenses.

We have no credit cards and no debt.

How? Did we win the lottery? Come into a large sum of money? Have rich parents or long lost family members?

Nope.

We simply went without for many many years. We worked hard to save and scrimp for the things we felt we important. We took family trips/vacations and activities that were free or very low cost.

We never applied for a credit card ever and never ever bought any type of toy or something fun unless we had the cash to pay for it in full.

In my personal opinion, it CAN be done.

It just depends on how bad you want to do it and how many things you want to live without....an if that meant moving to a part of the country that allowed us to do things in the way we did, I would have moved if necessary.

Question-did you work during this time or were you doing a one income household. Was it taking both of your incomes to get by or did you live on one income and save the other.

I've always been interested on one income families, budgets, how to live but not worry about bills, food and such so that you can have one income.

We are getting ahead a little bit each month but then something sets us back-medical bills (a couple thousand), braces (four four children), sending a child to public school is not cheap (four children), utilities alone (sometimes $500), mortgage (ugh), and the list goes on. If its not one thing its something else.

This month we will be writing checks for 3 fieldtrips-$150!

[jokalima]

I do Home DC because I need that second income I am not thrilled and exited about having a mess and a part of my home invaded by DC kids and stuff, but it NEEDS to be done. Why? Poor decision making during younger years, now to much debt and we might be able to survive on my husbands income w/out the debt, but we would have to live very frugally. So until I pay my credit cards/student loans etc debt, I will still need to work, but I choose to do it from home because I believe is the best for my child. Now, I know many people that don't need that second income, they would do just fine without and still have a "good" life, but they choose not to, they choose to send their kids to DC so they can advance in their careers, so they can have more and more in life, I don't understand that lifestyle but to each their own. I am more old fashioned, I believe in a home where the child is raised by the mother, for me that would be the ideal situation.

[LaLa1923]

We don't NEED both incomes. However, something always happens! My son broke his arm not long ago. Thank goodness for my income! I don't make a lot but I don't have to spend the money on dc for my kids now. We are also buying a bigger home between now and next March. We could buy a smaller home but I want my kids to have their own rooms. They already have to share a portion of the house with dc kids. Hubs wants a boat and toys etc.... We want things, and we want to enjoy life. We use his income for bills and mine goes into savings.
Unfortunately, his ex wife is taking him back to court (she doesn't want to work, just wants more support) so that means $300 an hour for our lawyer.

[kathiemarie]

I can only comment on what I know. Where I live it would be nearly impossible to survive and have children on only one parents' income.

We live in a townhouse 1,200 sq ft condo and our mortgage (HOA, water, garbage and property tax included) is almost $3,000 a month. That doesn't include the other utilities. To rent an apartment or home the same size it would cost about $1,800-$2,000/mo. I only make $30,000 a year at the moment so thank goodness that my DH makes well over that. To help us out we rent one of our spare bedrooms out to my mom for $450 monthly which is a steal compared to how much other rooms are to rent.

We could save money by renting but then we would never actually own anything ourselves and we do have 3 cars (my DC van, our commuter car and a truck) and we COULD give one of those up but DH doesn't want to give up his truck . We already coupon, shop sales etc. and rarely go out to restaurants to eat. Out of all of my friends that I know only 2 couples have it where the wife doesn't work. One doesn't have kids and the other live with the husbands parents (2 kids).

I live in your town. I do know people that live on one income. Heck we could if I did not have CC debt. (my choice to over spend.) I think a lot of times people think they NEED two incomes but I think if they really looked at what they spend on they wouldn't. I have one family that what they pay me is what the mom makes. She says she works for retirerment. I don't know I would rather stay home with my kids, but then to each their own.

[Crazy In Mo]

I have noticed that a lot of families live above their means & are always trying to keep up with the Joneses so they are strapped for cash. Then maybe a pay raise comes along-so they buy even bigger houses, better cars and they are STILL living above their means...Many people don't seem to know the difference between a want and a need...Spend $ they don't have, too much credit card debt, etc.

This EXACTLY! I think MOST people could survive on one income if they really wanted to.

It took me 8 years to get pregnant with my 3rd child. When it was time to go back to work.... Well it just wasn't gonna happen! There was nothing I wouldn't give up to be able to stay home with him. I worked to darn hard to get him here to let him spend his days with someone else. But I know ALOT of people aren't like that. Others needs are probably luxury items to me. ALOT of people HAVE to have cell phones, cable tv, name brand clothes, new cars, 5 flat screen TVs, 3 different types of computers......and so on. I have all of the things I just mentioned BUT would of willingly gave up every bit of it.

Honestly.... I get super sad when I hear parents talk about the long hours they work. Some having little to no time with their kids. It's just not worth it!

[Blackcat31]

Question-did you work during this time or were you doing a one income household. Was it taking both of your incomes to get by or did you live on one income and save the other.

We kind of took turns. First I was a college student and a stay at home mom while DH worked. I took mostly evening classes so he could be home with the kids.

Then I went to work and he stayed home. Granted he was building his own home business at the same but it wasn't like he had a consistent income.

He was only paid if he had orders for his products and the first 5 years were VERY slow and almost all the money he did make was put back into his business.

There were maybe only one or two years I can think of where we both actually had an income.

I've always been interested on one income families, budgets, how to live but not worry about bills, food and such so that you can have one income.

We are getting ahead a little bit each month but then something sets us back-medical bills (a couple thousand), braces (four four children), sending a child to public school is not cheap (four children), utilities alone (sometimes $500), mortgage (ugh), and the list goes on. If its not one thing its something else.

This month we will be writing checks for 3 fieldtrips-$150!

It is completely do-able in my opinion. You really just have to be decisive about the things you view as necessary or needed and what things you view and not-so-necessary or wanted.

My DH and I also made a conscious point to only have two children because we wanted to be able to afford certain things that we KNEW having more would not allow. Not saying it is bad to have more than two kids but both my DH and I came from families with 5 and 6 kids so we knew how that impacted a family and the pocket book.

I have also posted before about how I raised my children to work from the beginning. They were taught to prioritize their jobs before any extra curricular activities in school. School first, work second (their own jobs as well as chores at home) and then after school sports and/or school related functions.

I am confused by the statement that sending your child to public school is not cheap as it is public so why would it be so expensive?

We also took an unconventional route and don't have a traditional mortgage on our home. We were able to take out an equity loan against the property we owned and built our house for 1/4 of the value. I am lucky that my DH is a VERY skilled laborer. He is a plumber, an electrician, a woodworker and a mechanic so he pretty much built our home by himself.

Bottom line is that you really have to decide between want and need. After you do that, the rest is easy.

[Leanna]

I think that it truly does depend on what region of the country you live in. For example, my sister and her husband live in an area where rent for a nice three bedroom apartment is only about $400/month. Where I live it is $850 at the low end. My sister lives in a very large home (three floors, four bedrooms, mother-in-law apartment) that cost less than $70,000. My 900 sq. foot house cost $93,000. Area really does make a difference.

Also, while it is true that your lifestyle choices play a major role in your expenses, it is a struggle for me to live on my income only and we (me and three children) do not live lavishly: no car, no cable, no credit cards, cooking & eating at home, no vacations. The only debt I have is my mortgage and student loans because I refuse to get bogged down in credit card debt. Is it tempting? Absolutely. Especially around the holidays, but then I remind myself that they will appreciate whatever I can afford more than a stressed-out me everyday of the year.

[craftymissbeth]

I live in the Midwest so the cost of living is not nearly as high as many other places around the country, but we're trying to work down our debt from our younger and less educated years. We NEED both incomes in order to do so. We sold the vehicle with a car payment, cancelled the cable, and lowered our cell phone plan from unlimited everything to only what we need and we are still struggling. We basically only pay for the necessities. Our home is 95 years old, has only 5 years left on the mortgage, and the payment is equivalent to what rent goes for around here... so trading down is not an option.

I'm currently unemployed while I get the daycare started up, but my husband does make a decent living. Anyway, I guess if we had been smarter about our spending in the past we would be bathing in moolah right now

[MarinaVanessa]

I live in your town. I do know people that live on one income. Heck we could if I did not have CC debt. (my choice to over spend.) I think a lot of times people think they NEED two incomes but I think if they really looked at what they spend on they wouldn't. I have one family that what they pay me is what the mom makes. She says she works for retirerment. I don't know I would rather stay home with my kids, but then to each their own.

I hear ya, we just got married in August and are paying that off (and we only had a $7k wedding) PLUS my DH's debt that he had before we ever started dating. I'm sure if we downsized and lived in a different area we could totally live off of one income ... but, like I said ... we have 3 cars (3 car payments), a ridiculous mortgage (he bought when the market was high) etc. . There are deffinetely other places that we can skimp but my DH likes his toys .

It's good to see someone here from my neck of the woods. I hadn't realized .