Would You Mention This to DCP's?

[SilverSabre25]

hugs for having to deal with this...and hugs to your little dcb too

[Unregistered]

This is abuse. I would be calling dhs.

[LittleD]

My parents gave me a cold bath as a punishment around the age of 8 or 9, after sitting on a gravel road (my hands under my butt). I can very well imagine what this child's home life is like, and it's not pretty.

I would be calling CPS. Without a second thought.

I also wouldn't be telling the parents he had an accident.

(though bc had some very good points. Made me second guess myself, but I still wouldn't tell the parents, unless it happened a lot)

I hate to say it, but maybe they just don't know any better.

Our child was around that age and she would pee on the toilet but not poop. My husband had heard somewhere that cold showers to clean the up would teach them to not poop their pants. He/we love our daughter so much, and thankfully, I found out before he could try this new plan of action! I didn't realize it would be deemed as abusive at the time (wasn't a provider) but it just seemed mean!

When you think you have exhausted all other options, sometimes listening to other peoples methods no matter how ridiculous, seem viable!

[LK5kids]

As a mandatory reporter in my state I wouldn't have a choice. I'd have to report this and then the social worker on the case would investigate and decide if abuse was happening in this home.

[ABCDaycareMN]

As a mandatory reporter in my state I wouldn't have a choice. I'd have to report this and then the social worker on the case would investigate and decide if abuse was happening in this home.

I agree 100%. I also am a mandatory reporter in my state and I would have no choice but to tell.

[Unregistered]

This is the dark side of the child care business

I just had a 3.5 year dcb old make a #2 in his pants at naptime. He started shaking and crying and yelling, "It was an accident!" He has done this before, and I have written about this before on the forum a long time ago as well.

As I was cleaning him up, he freaked out and cried and said, "I dont want a cold shower!" (Again, i have heard this before). DCD told me once they do cold showers when the used to play in their poop. I told him that I was not going to do that and he calmed down. When he was all clean, I gave him a hug, i just felt so bad for him!

So, here is my dilemna. DCB is begging me not to tell dcm and dcd, because he doesnt want a cold shower when he gets home. Should I just not mention it? I dont think it is fair for him to be punished at home for a potty accident at daycare, and I disagree with the method as well.

i'm not sure what state you live in but in california FCCP's are mandate reporters and you only have to suspect child abuse to report it- no evidence needed in a case like this they may just keep it on file or interview the family (its confidental on who made the report) but yes that is traumatizing to the child (obviously he was crying because he was afraid of being punished) and according to the Naeyce's code of ethics it goes against the child's rights to do anthing that shames a child or involves any type of physical punishment- an adoptive mother in texas got her son taken away from using hot sauce as well as hot and cold showers as a form of punishment (she was on Dr.Phil and admitted to doing this). Cold showers depending on how long they last with a young child may cause chapped skin, frost bite, and even hypothermia. I have a CD teacher who said "legally parents have the right to spank their kids but if it leaves a visible mark you have to report it". If stuff like this goes on for too long and something happens and there is any evidence you could have done anything to prevent it it could affect you and your business- you can even be charged with child endangerment.

But in the future also make it a point in your contract and in interviews as well that when a child misbehaves or anything bad that happens during daycare, it will and should be dealt with at daycare (depending on the age and the offense). Its not fare to the child or the parent to punish their kids hours after an even and it's really bad for the child to fear all day that they are going to be punished again when their parents show up. Also remind them that you are a mandated reporter and if you suspect any type of abuse for the safety and well being of the child you need to report it.

if you don't want to jump to conclusions tell the parents about the incedent and tell them that their "punishment" is traumatizing the child, and according to the law if it traumatized a child it can be considered abuse.