Same Mom, Do You Find this Rude??

[My4SunshineGirlsNY]

The mom that irritates me..(allowed her kid in the drivers seat with car running, dropped son off without seeing me, lets him run all over her)...at pick up yesterday I was watching from my back yard (that's where I was with the other kids) and the boy gets in his mom's car, still running, the mom is on the outside of the car on the phone and the boy locks her out! With the car still running! I'm sending all my parents a memo tonight stating if they are outside of their car, the keys are to come with them.

The thing that she does that I find a bit rude is every morning and evening at drop off and pick up she NEVER knocks on my door first, she just walks right in. I guess I find that disrespectful...personally I would knock. I know I'm a registered daycare and she should have access, but morals tells me to knock first...what do you think? Even if she knocked and walked in would be better than just barging in.

Maybe I'm just irritated at all the other things she does that the little things are getting to me, including dropping her son off at 8:15 and NEVER feeding him first when my breakfast time is over by 8:30...by 8:15 I usually have it cleaned up and getting my elementary kids ready for the bus...she has ONE son to take care of...wonder if she ever thinks how that inconveniences me?

[momofboys]

The mom that irritates me..(allowed her kid in the drivers seat with car running, dropped son off without seeing me, lets him run all over her)...at pick up yesterday I was watching from my back yard (that's where I was with the other kids) and the boy gets in his mom's car, still running, the mom is on the outside of the car on the phone and the boy locks her out! With the car still running! I'm sending all my parents a memo tonight stating if they are outside of their car, the keys are to come with them.

The thing that she does that I find a bit rude is every morning and evening at drop off and pick up she NEVER knocks on my door first, she just walks right in. I guess I find that disrespectful...personally I would knock. I know I'm a registered daycare and she should have access, but morals tells me to knock first...what do you think? Even if she knocked and walked in would be better than just barging in.

Maybe I'm just irritated at all the other things she does that the little things are getting to me, including dropping her son off at 8:15 and NEVER feeding him first when my breakfast time is over by 8:30...by 8:15 I usually have it cleaned up and getting my elementary kids ready for the bus...she has ONE son to take care of...wonder if she ever thinks how that inconveniences me?

I personally would lock my doors. At least in the morning so you can monitor who comes & goes. Unless you are not permitted to for licensing reasons. I think it's highly rude to not knock whether your door is locked or not. I would never go into someone's home without them opening the door unless they called out, "Come on in . . . " Regarding your breakfast time though if you say it's until 8:30 & he comes at 8:15 that seems fair to still feed him. Maybe you should tell parents it ends at 8:00 if you are already cleaning up by 8:15. JMO!

[tymaboy]

I am registered as well & my front door is always locked. That way a complete stranger can not come walking in. Plus it drives me nuts when parent try to walk right into my home. I had 2 DCDs do it (the few times I forgot to lock my door) & both of them have served time in jail for shady things.

[Crystal]

My door is always unlocked and my parents NEVER knock. I feel that if their child is coming or going, this is like any other place of business, they can walk in.

We are not allowed to lock our doors, per licensing. Parents like to know that they can walk in unnanounced.

The provider locking the door and making parents wait for it to be answered can make parents suspicious as to WHY you don't want them popping in.

On the other issue....I would type up a letter stating your EXACT expectations of this parent, letting her know that if her child EVER gets into a running car without her in it again at your home, that she will be terminated and CPS will be contacted immediately. She is allowing her child to put himself, and any other person in the area in grave danger. I would not mince words about it, I'd be very straightforward and SERIOUS about it.

[jen]

I don't have my families knock either....truthfully, I don't want knocking doors and dogs barking all morning/evening long. It's easier for me for them to just come in. After morning drop-offs I lock up until pickup time.

[nannyde]

We are not allowed to lock our doors, per licensing.

Can you site the code for this please? The specific licensing regulation.

[tmcp2001]

I encourage my DCP's to walk right in - it's a huge pain for me to run down and answer the door while I'm trying to care for 5-10 children. I try to keep an eye out for parents pulling in the driveway so that I'm aware they are here but other than that, I'm so focused on the kids that I'm not really paying attention (and heck, sometimes it's so noisy in here that I may not hear them knock). I'm so happy that it's summer now so I can leave the door open with just the full glass storm door closed, it makes it easier for parents to just come in.

[Crystal]

Can you site the code for this please? The specific licensing regulation.

why? do you REALLY need to challenge EVERYTHING I say?

[nannyde]

why? do you REALLY need to challenge EVERYTHING I say?

Because it sounds very unsafe. I'm interested in the actual wording on this. I'm not able to find it in California's regs. If I remember correctly that is your state.

The only regs I can see regarding things that are to be "locked" are for guns, medicine, and pools.

[safechner]

The mom that irritates me..(allowed her kid in the drivers seat with car running, dropped son off without seeing me, lets him run all over her)...at pick up yesterday I was watching from my back yard (that's where I was with the other kids) and the boy gets in his mom's car, still running, the mom is on the outside of the car on the phone and the boy locks her out! With the car still running! I'm sending all my parents a memo tonight stating if they are outside of their car, the keys are to come with them.

The thing that she does that I find a bit rude is every morning and evening at drop off and pick up she NEVER knocks on my door first, she just walks right in. I guess I find that disrespectful...personally I would knock. I know I'm a registered daycare and she should have access, but morals tells me to knock first...what do you think? Even if she knocked and walked in would be better than just barging in.

Maybe I'm just irritated at all the other things she does that the little things are getting to me, including dropping her son off at 8:15 and NEVER feeding him first when my breakfast time is over by 8:30...by 8:15 I usually have it cleaned up and getting my elementary kids ready for the bus...she has ONE son to take care of...wonder if she ever thinks how that inconveniences me?

To me, yes it is very rude of her not to knock the door before enter your home. I always locked my front door because I wouldn't comfortable for the parents enter my home. I do believe it is safe for my daycare kids and my own.

I wouldn't image a few of providers leave unlock the door all day. Thinking about it. What if bogeyman or robbery watched the parents enter your home everyday. One day, someone shows up unexpected to hurt you or any kids, you never know. You might want to think twice. I am just trying to protection myself and the kids...

[misol]

why? do you REALLY need to challenge EVERYTHING I say?

Crystal, honestly I was curious to know what the wording was on this also. There was a similar thread a while back and one of the posters interpreted "open door policy" to mean that she had to keep her door unlocked at all times - which was not the case.

With all the crazies in the world today, I think it's unsafe. I keep my doors locked at ALL times whether kids are here or not. I would be very uncomfortable as a parent knowing that at anytime anyone could just walk in off the street and have access to my child. It also becomes a liability when the kids are able to just walk right out the front door.

[mac60]

My doors are unlocked at drop off and pick up times. Many other times they are locked. Whenever I go out in the backyard, I always lock my front door, always. We tend to have a lot of people walk by our house in our addition, and sometimes our addition is used as a cut thru to another addition. By the looks of some of the people that do walk past my home, they are quite shady. I too have an open door policy, but if you plan on coming early or later to drop off or pick up, I expect a phone call first. Hubby works second now, and people just waltzing in wakes him up and the dogs go off barking, little ones that are napping get woke up, etc. It is nothing but being respectful of me and my business and my family. Doesn't mean I have anything to hide, just respectful.

[tymaboy]

Open door policy means that the parent can come at anytime during hours of care to see their child it does not mean that the door needs to be unlocked. When I have my inspections they know that my door is locked even during care hours.

I do not know the back ground on all the parents that have ever been in care but I do know that 2 different fathers have been in jail. The one ended up serving time while his daughter was in my care for drugs & theft. This same dad I had found wondering threw rooms of my home that he did not need to be before he caught for his behavior.

On a different forum that I go to someone was talking about a "salesman" that went to her house & made a comment to her about having the door locked. Now why/how would that "salesman" know it was locked if he did not try it 1st? Later she talked to her neighbors to find out that this "saleman" skipped the homes that a there was a guy (husbands) outside working in the garage or yard. I have kids in care & to me it just makes sense to be safe & not sorry.

[My4SunshineGirlsNY]

I would find it safer for the kids to have the door locked, we don't want just anyone and everyone walking into our home. I do understand daycare clients should feel we are not hiding anything, I have absolutely nothing at all to hide, however just walking into someone's personal home just seems rude to me...I had my kids in a home daycare 2 years ago and I always knocked and waited for her to answer. I see how this could be a debate either way...I guess I just personally find it rude and wanted to see how other's perceived it.

As far as against regulations here in NY, I would have to look it up, however our local center has the door locked at all times and someone from inside has to let you in.

[Greenshadow]

Right now the parents knock and I answer it or say "Come in!". It does interrupt what Im doing, especially in the morning, because usually Im making breakfasts and thats at the back of my house. I may change that and just tell the parents to come in. It would be alot easier than to stop what Im doing and answer the door when I already know who it is. Although I DO keep my door locked during the day because my own son, who is 2, will open the door and walk away. LOL. It would be nice to have the door unlocked though in the early mornings at drop-off and again at pick-up times.