Do You Think A Teenager Needs An iPhone Or Cell Phone?

[mema]

I don't think they "need" it. If they need a ride or there's a change of their plans, the school has a phone or their friends house. Dh and I just upgraded to phones with internet. Wasn't something we needed either, but it is a lot faster than our computer sometimes, but we foot the bill. Ds is asking for a phone because all his buddies have one-he's 11. I told him no way. When he gets a job and can afford to help pay for it, then we'll talk. As for taking it away, darn right. It's not a necessity, so if they aren't doing what they are suppose to, privileges get taken.

[jojosmommy]

I agree, there are no more pay phone on street corners like there used to be, but every single one of her friends has a cell phone and the school has a phone too. If she really needed to call me, she could use theirs.

I really don't have any reason to need to get in touch with my daughter, unless it was an emergency and then it would be done the old fashion way, which is that I would drive to where ever she is. I think that we are SO dependent of the convenience of cell phones, that it almost enables our communication with people at times.

I also don't feel that it makes my daughter any safer. Perfect example, unfortunately, a teen girl was kidnapped from her home where I live. Her cell phone was found on the side of the road about a mile from her home. So it didn't do anything for her.

I agree 100%.

[SimpleMom]

My teen has a basic phone with basic service just so we can reach eachother if needed. It's been a great thing. I wouldn't let her have an IPHONE just yet. If I did it would be monitored and screened, things like that....limits.

As for taking the phone away, I would do the same, but would let them use it if going to be out of the house and such, BUT i am clear that it's only to be used in an emergency and to contact me. It MUST ALWAYS be anwered if I call. I will and do check the usage/calls out on these occassions just to make sure the rules are followed---otherwise, no use next time. and on occassion I check emails/texts just to make sure all is good. They know this. I really don't have many problems with this system and it works wonders for a little leverage when I need it :P

We do talk about safety issues with cell phones/internet, etc. and it's continuous. That's what works for me and my hubby. I don't have to deal with an ex., but I would think that if it's a rule at your house, then that's that. Kids know what they can get away with and with whom they can get away with it---married or not. JMHO

[saved4always]

I have a 17 year old and a 19 year old. The boys never had phones until they started going more places like outings with their youth group or after school things. And then the phone was only for MY peace of mind so they could let me know where they were, that they got somewhere safely, etc. It was a flip phone that had 100 minutes a month, no texting, and at first they shared the one phone since they were usually in the same place. A couple years ago, my husband and I each got a phone with a keyboard and we got the boys each one, also. Texting is an awesome way for us to keep in touch with them now so we have unlimited texting. We love it. That being said, we do not have a data plan on any of the phones so there are no games or internet access used on the phones. If they want i-phones or something similar, they will have to pay for that for themselves (and my older son does have an ipod touch that he bought himself). Our 10 year old daughter wants her own phone, but she won't get it until I need her to have it and then hers will also be very limited as her brothers were.

[saved4always]

I don't think that it's a need either and a Go-Phone is a great choice. You can even get one of those safety phones that only has 4 buttons and you pre-program it to dial only 4 phone numbers (one number per button). It also has a red button which calls 911. ::

These are cool...this may be something to look at for my youngest when she is a little older and going places more with friends.

[renodeb]

I have to admit that I was very resistent to my son needing/getting a cell phone at first. The first one he got was called a "migo" with 4 numbers programed into it. Then he had a couple hand me downs when we would upgrade. (with limitied axcess ofcourse). Through all this he proved himself to be very responsible with keeping it with him and not abusing the privlege. Within the last year he saved his own money up and bought an I phone. Still very responcible with it, we felt fine about him having it.
To be honest I like knowing he can call us if he needs to stay late at football practice or something. It does bring me some piece of mind to. Now if he had been irresponcible from the start the whole phone thing would of gone much diffrently.
I have a 9 (closer to ten year old) daughter and she has one to. (limitied axcess ofcourse) and is constantly loosing it around the house and its often not charged. Shes the one who will need to prove shes repsoncible enough with it. She just has a crappy hand me down which will suit her fine for a long time.
I think its a case by case thing. If taking the phone away is good currency then I say great. Afterall most teens are glued to there phone! My son knows that when he gets a job thatr he will have to pay a portion of his phone.
I agree with others, its really a personal choice thing.
Debbie

[Michael]

I don't think that it's a need either and a Go-Phone is a great choice. You can even get one of those safety phones that only has 4 buttons and you pre-program it to dial only 4 phone numbers (one number per button). It also has a red button which calls 911. ::

I did get the FireFly for my daughter when she was 8 and the customer service was terrible. Could never get them on the phone so if you have a problem and can't their online webiste to help you, you're screwed. I use it as a paper weight now. She is 12 now and has an iPhone.

[Crazy8]

I think any teen would be mortified to carry one of the above - so if you are looking for punishment that is definitely the way to go. She'd probably choose no cell phone over that!!

I don't usually consider myself a "young" parent but maybe on here I am. We are a pretty tech savvy family and I am glad my DD has a cell phone, not an iphone due to the cost though - we have 5 phones on our plan and 2 are iphones, its another $30/month to add another iphone!!!! But I like that its easy for me to contact her when she's out, when I am dropping her off at 2-3 hour outdoor practices I don't need to rely on a coach having a phone, etc. We are always changing carpooling so I need her to know who is picking up, etc. So many reasons I am just glad she has her phone and I get mad if she doesn't charge it. I do limit her "play" time on the phone/ipod touch/laptop - if I find she is hanging out on it too much and I take the ipod away as punishment.

[AnythingsPossible]

My son has had a cell phone since he was 13. He has always been super involved in things, and I like him having the phone so I know what is going on and when he needs picked up and such. He is 15 now and we have never had issues with him using his phone innappropriately. He does not have internet access. He also knows that we can and will check his phone at any point. I don't think they need a phone, but depending on what they are involved in, for me, it brings peace of mind.

[Kaddidle Care]

Where we live you're not allowed to have a cell phone in High School so even if the teen had it on the way to school, it would have to be put in the locker during the day. Enforcing this on the parent's end is crucial and easy enough to check through phone bill records.

Walking to school - there is safety in numbers. A phone offers little protection as by the time the call goes through, the deed is done. If your husband feels that strongly that it isn't safe enough for the child to walk to school, then drive her.

We gave our son a simple cell phone for his 16th birthday. No bells, no whistles, no texting. Just a phone for emergency. The only time he used it was when he stayed after for club to tell me it was over so he could be picked up.

This generation of teens can't seem to live without their phones and texting and frankly, I'm tired of people DYING because they have developed such a habit that they cannot drive without being attached to it. I can't tell you how many times I've had a car cross the line and head straight at me and when I look at the driver to see what is going on, I only see the top of their head because they are texting or dialing a phone.

So.. in answer to your question, does a teenager NEED a phone? No, they do not.

[MrsB]

My 14 yr old daughter has a smart phone (not an iphone) but has everything an iphone has. At first I think it got a little out of hand, I felt like she would have panick attacks if she didnt have it. (As did I if it was dead and she was out and about). We had no restrictions on it mostly because I didnt see all the things that could go wrong on it! Then we had to real her back in and the cell phone usage.

1 we have parent controls - so I can set the time of which she can and can't make phone calls/texts. (except to me or emergency numbers that I specifiy)
2. we have family locator- i can see where she is on gps by the phone. I know of course she could leave it where it is supposed to be and then come back for it, but she also knows that she has to answer immediately when I call.
3. It is usually the first thing i take away when she acts up. Has REALLY helped behavior modification. happyfacehappyface
4. we have made it clear, the phone is mine, I have access to look at any messages, texts, FB posts if I so choose. She knows the more attitude I get from her, the more I feel the need to go snooping!
5. She is enrolled in an online homeschooling curriculum so we have it set up to where she hands me her phone at 9:30pm at night and she gets it back the next day when she has completed all her school work. As long as it is not abused, she gets it on the weekends and hands it back to me 930pm sunday night.
6. I still want to know exactly who she's with, exactly where she is, I still meet and talk to everyones parents and I want their phone numbers too!

Daycare-I think you are doing the right thing. Try not to take the "I hate you" personally. She loves you! I never said those things (out loud) when I was growing up either. Not because I didnt think them, but because I knew my dad would throw me through the window. Teens usually say that one because they know the way to break you down is to hurt your feelings and they have no other "ammo".One day she will thank you for giving her boundries and limitations! H****!

[Breezy]

A cell phone, maybe. An IPhone or other smart phone no I don't think so at that age. I think that is something that should come when the child can have a job and pay for that phone. And definately not if grades are falling. We weren't allowed to have our phones out of our lockers in school either but kids always found a way to text all throughout class in their back packs and not looking.

[daycare]

Where we live you're not allowed to have a cell phone in High School so even if the teen had it on the way to school, it would have to be put in the locker during the day. Enforcing this on the parent's end is crucial and easy enough to check through phone bill records.

Walking to school - there is safety in numbers. A phone offers little protection as by the time the call goes through, the deed is done. If your husband feels that strongly that it isn't safe enough for the child to walk to school, then drive her.

We gave our son a simple cell phone for his 16th birthday. No bells, no whistles, no texting. Just a phone for emergency. The only time he used it was when he stayed after for club to tell me it was over so he could be picked up.

This generation of teens can't seem to live without their phones and texting and frankly, I'm tired of people DYING because they have developed such a habit that they cannot drive without being attached to it. I can't tell you how many times I've had a car cross the line and head straight at me and when I look at the driver to see what is going on, I only see the top of their head because they are texting or dialing a phone.

So.. in answer to your question, does a teenager NEED a phone? No, they do not.

[daycare]

My 14 yr old daughter has a smart phone (not an iphone) but has everything an iphone has. At first I think it got a little out of hand, I felt like she would have panick attacks if she didnt have it. (As did I if it was dead and she was out and about). We had no restrictions on it mostly because I didnt see all the things that could go wrong on it! Then we had to real her back in and the cell phone usage.

1 we have parent controls - so I can set the time of which she can and can't make phone calls/texts. (except to me or emergency numbers that I specifiy)
2. we have family locator- i can see where she is on gps by the phone. I know of course she could leave it where it is supposed to be and then come back for it, but she also knows that she has to answer immediately when I call.
3. It is usually the first thing i take away when she acts up. Has REALLY helped behavior modification. happyfacehappyface
4. we have made it clear, the phone is mine, I have access to look at any messages, texts, FB posts if I so choose. She knows the more attitude I get from her, the more I feel the need to go snooping!
5. She is enrolled in an online homeschooling curriculum so we have it set up to where she hands me her phone at 9:30pm at night and she gets it back the next day when she has completed all her school work. As long as it is not abused, she gets it on the weekends and hands it back to me 930pm sunday night.
6. I still want to know exactly who she's with, exactly where she is, I still meet and talk to everyones parents and I want their phone numbers too!

Daycare-I think you are doing the right thing. Try not to take the "I hate you" personally. She loves you! I never said those things (out loud) when I was growing up either. Not because I didnt think them, but because I knew my dad would throw me through the window. Teens usually say that one because they know the way to break you down is to hurt your feelings and they have no other "ammo".One day she will thank you for giving her boundries and limitations! H****!

thank you...I am right no board with your rules... I pretty much do the same thing, just slightly different.

Thank you for making me feel better. I spent all weekend crying....I don't know why I took it so personal..

[Blackcat31]

thank you...I am right no board with your rules... I pretty much do the same thing, just slightly different.

Thank you for making me feel better. I spent all weekend crying....I don't know why I took it so personal..

She said it because she knew it would get to you! Next time don't let her have that control! If she says she hates you tell her that is too bad because you love her. They hate that!

I also used to tell my DD when she said she hated me thank you because at least I knew I was doing something right then! LOL!

You know in your heart of hearts she doesn't mean it but words are all she has right now so she is going to use them. Just turn it around on her.