Am I Heartless?

[daycare]

no not heatless at all....#1 lesson I have learned from this site. Don't let their problems become your problems.

Just as they have financial obligations to their own family you do too.

[cheerfuldom]

I would stick with the regular price. If your mom wants to offer a discount, she should take the hit on her paycheck or front the difference herself, problem solved.

[mema]

Another problem with this situation is : It isn't 100% my call. My Mom gets just as much say as I do.

We work opposite of eachother and bc I am taking off an extra day this week....the baby will only be here one of my days. She offered that what they do pay will be 'mine', but that really isn't the point in my book. I agree if we do it this time it will only snowball.

So if the baby will be there only 1 of your days, that means your mom is off that day right? Then she can watch the baby 2 days at daycare and 1 day at her place. What a stinky situation that you'll probably have no say in Good luck. Maybe your mom will decide it's not a good idea-one can always hope.

[MsMe]

Good idea mema! but I doubt that would happen

Thank you all for sharing your thoughts....I feel better knowing I am not alone. My Mom did make be feel really heartless last night when I told her I dodn't have any problem doing it but that they needed to pay and I didn't feel sorry for them (in referance to $$ not he family member in the hospital)

[MizzCheryl]

That is why they asked your mom. Thinking she would be a softy and do it for nothing. $90.00 is what I would charge. BUT I would not keep a 4 month old for just a week. Only take babies full time.

[My3cents]

Oh Geez! I never do what you think you can? What people think they can pay is always different than what they really can. Kind of like the banks, there bank loan amount that they think you can afford is always alot higher than what you really can. Now look at where the country is because everybody borrowed what the bank said they could afford, but turns out they couldn't.

I know that doesnt help you much with an answer.

Is it possible that you could talk to them and say to them, that your normal rate is $120 for those three days, have them discuss it and see what they think it is they can afford, and then you can get back to them on if you can afford to provide care for the price they can afford?

no way- then they become your boss. You set the rate and it should be what everyone else pays- wrong to do for one and not the rest- parents talk. Friend or not. You only have so many spaces. I like the person that said have your mom take a hit on whatever they can't afford- that will open up your mom's eyes. You need to talk with your mom and explain you are a business. Your income depends on the daycare, it is not extra for you.

Another thing having a baby come part time like that is going to bring you more hassles then it is worth. Never will be able to get on the a schedule do to mix days coming and not routine. It will be hard for you.

If this is a one time thing for a week, then I would consider it but have your mom know it is a one time thing. Working with your mom you both need to be on the same page that your a business and how you agree to work things. These people knew how to pull on just the right heart strings- don't fall for it.

[AmyLeigh]

Here's an idea....

Your mom pays you for the discounted rate of $90, and then the family can reimburse her whatever they can afford. You get paid what you are asking, and your mom can help out the friends. Just warn her that this may become a regular occurance if she keeps giving "special".

[Christian Mother]

I agree w/Amy...

These people really asked your mother to care for their child..with the exception that you also work there but they didn't go and get your approval they got your mothers...so the responsibility needs to be completely taken by your mother. You can tell her that "No, I am sorry but that these people didn't ask for my help they asked for yours". If they had simply called you and you where able to judge for your self the situation you might of felt a little better about it. You could of had the chance in telling them that,..hey I don't mind caring for little but I charge drop in care of $30 bc that is what I am worth. You could go in further about the care that is needed for a tiny 3/4 mo. old. They need quiet a bit of care...2 or 3 hr feedings. regular diaper changes...and on top of that you have other children around you also needing you. It is a hard job to do....I would put this all back on your mom bc it sounds like she is already ok with it.

[MsMe]

All good ideas!!

I was just talking to a local provider friend (she is never strict a bout money and clomplains constantly about not getting paid) she said, "Well, I would probably be willing to help them out."

MY resonse was (and I think this is hwat you ladies are say too) is that I AM willing to help them out. I WILL watch the baby...I just don't understand why I shouldn't be paid (I even go as far as to expect full price).

Me helping out is watchign the baby....wanting to be paid for it is not me "not helping out"

What is this world coming to?

Just this week I finished paying off (with added interest) $40,000 in student loans to a college I never graduated from, but that didn't make me think I didn't owe every dime of the money. Yes, I hated sending over 40% of my income each month for something I had nothing to show for..

PAY YOUR BILLS PEOPLE!!!

[MsMe]

Update.

Update.

We never heard anymore from the family friend about watchin gher grandaughter. Tuesday came and they never showed up (not that I wanted her to, with no information)

Mom just got a text from the grandma. "Baby Mom started a new job Tues, Thurs, Friday. What kid of good deal can you give me?"



So they want a spot every week not just bc Uncle is sick (so that clears up why the uncle in the hospital story didn't add up.)

I think it so rude that they don't call the daycare phone, basicly assume we have a spot no question, and they we will offer a 'good deal'

I do have spots open (+2ys and full time only) and am not in a place right now to give ANYONE a good deal.

Thankfully my Mom agrees and said even though it will be hard she will tell her we can't take the baby. happyface

[mema]

Awesome! Glad she agrees! happyface

[MarinaVanessa]

Thankfully my Mom agrees and said even though it will be hard she will tell her we can't take the baby. happyface

Funny ... did your mom get on board when she realized that they really wanted a deal "all of the time" vs "one time" deal? In either case I'm glad that she's agreeing with you. I could have understood if you had decided to "help out" by receiving the $90 and having your mom collect "what they could afford" as others suggested but only if it was going to be for a short period of time. Wow ... I can't believe some people aren't build with a filter.

[MsMe]

Yes, even she knows we don't have the wiggle room right now to be offereing anyone a deal...no matter how long they have been a friend. It was also no question bc we do not have an under 2 opening right now (we have an expecting mom.)