Am I Heartless?

[MsMe]

I feel like a bad person but I am annoyed none the less.

My Mother (my partner) got a call last night from an old friend who was asking for drop-in daycare for her granddaughter 3 days next week. This is a baby 3 or 4mo old.

Grandma's (Dad's mom) brother is in the hospital and not doing well. I don't think the baby is in daycare at all....they must want to spend time with the Uncle? But only on Tues, Thurs, Fri? I don't think this Gma does any of the childcare (she lives over an hour away) so I am confussed...

And here is why I am annoyed....."I can't pay much so I'll need a good deal"

I am not a heartless person, really I am not, but you don't have $90.00 between ALL of you to pay for daycare for one week of the childs life? You had a child ON purpose and and don't have ANY savings? I know it is an expense... I know someone is in the hosptial....but I really feel that they SHOULD pay full price...not ask for a 'really good deal' with out me offering.

I am also annoyed the Mom and Dad didn't call for daycare themselves but rather had Gma call my Mom at home late at night. I grew up with the Dad and the Mom I went to High School with...they also live next door to me and I see them often.

[Kaddidle Care]

Everyone is on the Poverty bandwagon. They are usually the folks that get their nails done once a week, hair done professionally every 6 weeks and shop at the mall frequently.

It's not that they don't "have" it's that they don't "want to pay".

That statement about not having much money translates to - it's a relative and they're hoping you'll do it for free.

Yeah... good luck with that.

[MsMe]

It's not that they don't "have" it's that they don't "want to pay".

This exactly!!! I know $90.00 isn't fun....but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have to pay it!!!!

p.s $90.00 is a deal the drop in for a baby should be $120.00.

The daycare is my Mothers "extra" money and she is forever trying to give it away. Not me this is my only income and I depend on all of it.

Plus this is a little baby....not a 3yr old that is just going to blend into the program for a few days.

[EntropyControlSpecialist]

I would not do it.

[LittleD]

Everyone is on the Poverty bandwagon. They are usually the folks that get their nails done once a week, hair done professionally every 6 weeks and shop at the mall frequently.

It's not that they don't "have" it's that they don't "want to pay".

That statement about not having much money translates to - it's a relative and they're hoping you'll do it for free.

Yeah... good luck with that.

Oh that's my cousin!! Nails done, hair done AND bought a new SUV, buys her 8 yr old a laptop and ipod for Christmas, but is soooooooo broke! That drives me nuts when people are like that! I don't feel sorry for them at all when they say they can't pay their heat bill in the winter!

[countrymom]

I wouldn't do it, I can see the chaos coming already. For the sake of the other children, don't do it. the whole story doesn't make sense. Why wouldn't mom and dad take a day off from work and they all work together and come up with a plan. and usually babies sleep alot, why wouldn't they bring the baby to the hospital with them. Hmm, something smells stinky here.

[Blackcat31]

I would NOT do it!!

You are a business not a family friend doing someone a favor. If they had the grandmother call your mother it ws because they were playing the "friend" card knowing that they could use that relationship to get special.

If your mom feels badly, then she should offer to watch the child on her own time as a favor to the grandmother but as far as coming to daycare, they need to pay regular rates or don't ask for the service.

Could you imagine pulling up to the gas station and saying "fill it up but give me a deal because I can't afford much." I mean, who can afford stuff now days? I would be really offended that they even asked at all.

[MsMe]

I would NOT do it!!

You are a business not a family friend doing someone a favor. If they had the grandmother call your mother it ws because they were playing the "friend" card knowing that they could use that relationship to get special.

If your mom feels badly, then she should offer to watch the child on her own time as a favor to the grandmother but as far as coming to daycare, they need to pay regular rates or don't ask for the service.

Could you imagine pulling up to the gas station and saying "fill it up but give me a deal because I can't afford much." I mean, who can afford stuff now days? I would be really offended that they even asked at all.

I am very offened that they asked. Thank you ladies for your opinions.

[MrsB]

Ugggh, a 3/4 month old as a drop in, especially one that isnt normally in care. Sounds like a scheduling disaster!

By the way my drop in rate for infants is $50 per day. So tell them $120 is a great deal!happyfacehappyface

Remember, if you do it for them this time, they will think they get it like that every time.

I would be totally annoyed too!

[MsMe]

Another problem with this situation is : It isn't 100% my call. My Mom gets just as much say as I do.

We work opposite of eachother and bc I am taking off an extra day this week....the baby will only be here one of my days. She offered that what they do pay will be 'mine', but that really isn't the point in my book. I agree if we do it this time it will only snowball.

[MrsB]

Another problem with this situation is : It isn't 100% my call. My Mom gets just as much say as I do.

We work opposite of eachother and bc I am taking off an extra day this week....the baby will only be here one of my days. She offered that what they do pay will be 'mine', but that really isn't the point in my book. I agree if we do it this time it will only snowball.

Does make the situation really "sticky".

Can you maybe say to your mom that she needs to fully explain to them, that $90 for this week is okay, but any other drop in care in the future needs to be the $40 per day, no exceptions?

[MsMe]

Does make the situation really "sticky".

Can you maybe say to your mom that she needs to fully explain to them, that $90 for this week is okay, but any other drop in care in the future needs to be the $40 per day, no exceptions?

offering care @ $90 is what I think a deal would be. I didn't talk to them, but My Mother wants to just let them pay "what they can"

[MrsB]

offering care @ $90 is what I think a deal would be. I didn't talk to them, but My Mother wants to just let them pay "what they can"

Oh Geez! I never do what you think you can? What people think they can pay is always different than what they really can. Kind of like the banks, there bank loan amount that they think you can afford is always alot higher than what you really can. Now look at where the country is because everybody borrowed what the bank said they could afford, but turns out they couldn't.

I know that doesnt help you much with an answer.

Is it possible that you could talk to them and say to them, that your normal rate is $120 for those three days, have them discuss it and see what they think it is they can afford, and then you can get back to them on if you can afford to provide care for the price they can afford?

[Creek]

The way I see it is that a spot is a spot. I don't really care who you are, you are all still paying the exact same. I am not too sure why people think this is acceptable to ask for a deal like that.

That would be like me going up to an employee and saying... I'm only going to pay you 50% of your salary this week, sound good? Great!

[DCBlessings27]

I don't think you're heartless. I think the $90 would be fair if it should really be $120.

I'm over doing special for parents. I get so fed up sometimes. I have some former parents who brought the younger sib of the dcb I used to watch. They couldn't qualify for subsidy, so I said I'd work with them. I am letting them pay me $20 less a week than my normal and way less than my actual infant rate bc he's almost out of the infant age category. However, they eat out ALL the time. It annoys me how I am losing so much per month while they spend so much by eating out all the time.

Sorry, I shouldn't be judging them. Just a little rant.