Top 5 List Revisit. 2012

[Blackcat31]

OK, so I should probably clarify.

Of course I treated my own children differently. I treat every child differently, for that matter. It's one of by basic philosophies in raising children: life is not always fair, so get over it now!

What I meant was that I don't treat my own children better than my dc kids.
Of course we don't know what our children or those children are thinking or feeling. I can think of many times as a child (and as an adult even) when I've felt misunderstood. Honestly, though, there are times when you could give two children the exact same thing at the exact same moment, and one would still manage to say "hey......" Again, I can honestly say I never treated one of my daycare kids like they were 2nd class, I'm sticking to that.

I don't get too riled up too often, but I felt a little pang there when I read that, because I for one have worked really really hard to take really really good care of my dc kids and make each one feel special and loved!

Please don't think I was implying that you ever treated a kid 2nd class....because that was NOT at all what I meant.

I was just trying to support the fact that I too would prefer a provider who didnt have her own young children in care.

I have chatted with you enough to know you are a very caring and wonderful provider and I never in a million years would iply you treated kids (yours or DCK's differently). Again, I was only trying to state a different perspective.

I think in my own situation that I too, never treated my own kids better or worse than DCK's but I am also realistic enough to know that that is probably not 100% true because my kids were MY kids....kwim? If nay of my DCK's ever felt 2nd rate or if my own kids did ever, I was not aware of it.

We are all human and we all do the best we can with the situation we are in.

So, my apologies if I offended you .....no offense was meant....

I just read Cat's post and your response saying others may have issue with her statement regarding a provider's own children and since I felt the same way, I tried to give my thoughts and perspective about it.

[Lucy]

Not necessarily in order of preference, but here are mine:

CLEANLINESS (Home as well as Provider. Shows she cares. However, not TOO clean because she might be anal and rag on my kid about every teeny tiny thing)

SPACE (Enough space for the kids to play without being crowded into a small area.)

ATTITUDE/DEMEANOR (I want to see that the Provider seems like she genuinely enjoys her job. I don't want her to be shy, or a person of few words. I want her to be outgoing and energetic and seem like she'd be a positive person.)

EXPERIENCE (I realize you can be just as good if you're new, but if she has 5 or more years under her belt, it would be a huge plus to me. More, actually. Like 10 plus.)

MENU (I'm not a health freak, but I want to know that they have fairly nutritious foods, and not hot dogs and pizza. Those have their place, but I want to know that MOST days, they are getting nutritious foods, per the USDA.)

Ok, you said 5, but here's my shallow person's 6th one:

OTHER KIDS (Sorry, but I would totally be looking at the other kids and seeing if any of them look dirty or mean. Shallow of me, but I know that's what I would do!! At least I can admit it!!)

ETA: I hadn't read the previous responses because I didn't want to be influenced. However, upon reading them, I think I'd have to make it a top 15!! There are some really great ones listed here. I'll leave my 5 as they are, but if I re-did it now, it may be different after seeing some of your other great ideas!! This was a good exercise. Makes you think like the client for a change. Thanks!!

[Lucy]

I want my kids in a home daycare where the caregiver has direct experience with having 100% responsibility over the child. She knows the "look" of a sick child and has that intuition to know when something is not right or "off" with a child. I want to know she has been in the trenches and come out the other side.

I'm not bashing your opinion at all, as it is YOUR opinion. I just wanted to comment that I am 48, married 15 years, but never had children. HOWEVER, I do know ALL those things you listed above. My mother did Childcare from before I was born until I left the home, so I have always been around kids, and witnessed proper ways to care for them via my Mom. I am around nieces and nephews constantly, always have been, and am very close to many of them. I have done DC for almost 18 years, and I feel there is absolutely NO downside to the fact that I never carried and bore a child. I feel like I'm better with kids than some of my friends and relatives!! And I'm soooo into safety at ALL times. I've always had it in my mind how devastating it would be to have something happen to the kids, and that I would NOT want to make "that" phone call. In almost 18 years, I've NEVER had to. I've never had more than a sliver in a finger. Please don't take this as me being mad at what you said, because I'm totally not. I just wanted to point out that it CAN be done.

[AmyLeigh]

1. Safe, clean environment, with a lot of square footage, more than one play area, and a napping area that is separate from a play area. I want my child to be somewhere with lots of stimulation and options for play. There doesn't have to be a ton of toys, per-se: I like creative play. Dress up clothes, science centers, sensory bins, etc.

2. Somewhere where at they will get at least 1 hour of outdoor play, minimum. The more they are outside the better. Bonus points for swings and play structures.

3. Somewhere that serves (mostly) home-made, all natural or organic ingredient food. No processed food from a can or jar. Natural PB&J is fine with me! Anything with high fructose corn syrup = not fine. I want a provider that shares my outlook on health and wellness. PLEASE don't kill me for saying this: But I want a provider who is physically fit as well. Yes, you can be slightly overweight and physically fit, but I would never hire a slouch. Before I did daycare, my first nanny was a slouch- I justified that appearance doesn't matter, but it really does. She was very overweight, lazy, online too much, too much TV, and she didn't physically engage my kids. You really can't chase and play with kids all day and still be obese, unless all you are doing is sitting down while you observe the kids play and never play with them. If you cant or wont even take care of your own appearance, what kind of care are you offering my kids. (PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't get mad at me for saying this- just my own opinion: does not mean it is RIGHT, and it stems from my own bad experience....) But, other parents may have had the same experience in the past so I am adding it to the list.

4. Provider must use proper grammer and speak well, enforce manners, command respect and discipline, and make my child follow the rules, while being loving and caring, and showing an interest in my child. IE: When my child comes over to you to show you something, don't ignore her for being "annoying," listen to her and respect her as an individual. I want my child to feel important, without feeling like they have to be the center of attention all the time. Bonus points for "working" with my child to learn to read, spell, write, etc.

5. I would want another child in the same age or developmental level as my child, so they would have someone to play with on their level. This isn't as important for the little one, but my 3.5 year old needs another 3.5 or 4 year old to play with. (When I took on another 3.5 year old to care for, my dd went from the instigator to a perfect angel. She was bored I think. So now, I have 1 boy and 1 girl the same age- a coincidence but my household equilibrium is very good).

I am one of those parents who have higher expectations, but I would be willing to pay a lot more for those services.

This is a great question! I can't wait to read the other answers.

ummmm.....this...exactly.

[BigMama]

I am going to assume the provider is licensed, has education in early childhood, no criminal history, and has a pleasant demeanor. I am also going to assume the house is tidy, safe, and there is ample space for the children to play.

1) A diverse group of children and families. Diverse in any and every way.

2) A program that is developmentally appropriate for young children. No packaged curriculum but much more than "go play toys."

3) The provider must speak to the children as if they were people - not a lesser life form. No baby talk, high pitched voices, referring to self in third person, using poor grammar, etc.

4) Someone who does not use time-out as a "discipline" technique for toddlers and preschoolers.

5) Someone who I can see myself spending time with. Not that the provider and I would be friends, but if I wouldn't spend an afternoon with the person, how can expect my child to spend their days there?