Rude Parent

[Unregistered]

Hi

I have a child who has been in my care since he has been one. I have been doing daycare for 2 1/2 yrs and this child has been with me from the beginning. Because I was new to this business I told the parent that I will take the subsidy money and she doesn't have to pay any money. (stupid mistake). Anways she was happy that she was getting free daycare, and it didn't really bother me either. but now the child has turned 3 and the subsidy rate has gone down, and I am asking the parent to pay the remainder starting April 1. (a very small portion) she has been giving me the run around, she paid up finally but she has started to be rude with me. I am surprised with her behaviour, she was fine the last 2 yrs and now she has to pay up and she's been very disrespectful.

I do not wish to continue this kind of relationship with her. I need advice on what to do with this situation.

[momofboys]

Hi

I have a child who has been in my care since he has been one. I have been doing daycare for 2 1/2 yrs and this child has been with me from the beginning. Because I was new to this business I told the parent that I will take the subsidy money and she doesn't have to pay any money. (stupid mistake). Anways she was happy that she was getting free daycare, and it didn't really bother me either. but now the child has turned 3 and the subsidy rate has gone down, and I am asking the parent to pay the remainder starting April 1. (a very small portion) she has been giving me the run around, she paid up finally but she has started to be rude with me. I am surprised with her behaviour, she was fine the last 2 yrs and now she has to pay up and she's been very disrespectful.

I do not wish to continue this kind of relationship with her. I need advice on what to do with this situation.

How disrespectful of her! So you have had a good relationship with her prior to this? Would you feel comfortble talking with her about it? Maybe tiptoeing around the subject & gently saying something like "lately I have noticed you don't seem to treat me the same & I wondered if something was wrong? Are you unhappy with my care? Hopefully saying something non-confrontational such as that could open the door to discussing the real issue. Matters of $$$ are never easy to discuss in my opinion. I guess I should ask is the behavior so bad that you want to terminate?

[Unregistered]

rude parent

Hi

The parent has just begun being rude, not directly to me but through her child. It's all just begun after the payment changes. I will not settle for $550.00 a month when I have other parents who are paying way more, and I feel i'm not being fair to the other parents. Since the change she has begun critizing through her son of how much he learns in daycare and that he should be able to read small words. I told her she needs to enroll him in pre-school if she wants her son to learn how to read and write at the age of 3. Daycare and pre-school are totally different. She is infact considering enrolling her son in pre school but she doesn't want to pay the extra fee, she's nagging at me to begin teaching him.

[Chickenhauler]

Hi

The parent has just begun being rude, not directly to me but through her child. It's all just begun after the payment changes. I will not settle for $550.00 a month when I have other parents who are paying way more, and I feel i'm not being fair to the other parents. Since the change she has begun critizing through her son of how much he learns in daycare and that he should be able to read small words. I told her she needs to enroll him in pre-school if she wants her son to learn how to read and write at the age of 3. Daycare and pre-school are totally different. She is infact considering enrolling her son in pre school but she doesn't want to pay the extra fee, she's nagging at me to begin teaching him.

Find out what the cost of the pre school is, then figure out the difference between your cost and theirs, and when she brings it up, just plaster on a big fake smile (think of that guy BOB from the enzyte commercials) and say "When you start paying me to operate a educational setting, I will. Until then, your child will be kept safe in a clean environment and fed nutritious meals, just like you're paying for".

[Childminder]

In my contract it states that that childcare is $______, any and all fees that state subsidy does not cover is the responsibility of the parent/s. If entire amount of tuition and fees are not paid then care will be suspended or terminated.

[jen]

Hi

I have a child who has been in my care since he has been one. I have been doing daycare for 2 1/2 yrs and this child has been with me from the beginning. Because I was new to this business I told the parent that I will take the subsidy money and she doesn't have to pay any money. (stupid mistake). Anways she was happy that she was getting free daycare, and it didn't really bother me either. but now the child has turned 3 and the subsidy rate has gone down, and I am asking the parent to pay the remainder starting April 1. (a very small portion) she has been giving me the run around, she paid up finally but she has started to be rude with me. I am surprised with her behaviour, she was fine the last 2 yrs and now she has to pay up and she's been very disrespectful.

I do not wish to continue this kind of relationship with her. I need advice on what to do with this situation.

To be honest, I would just terminate her.

[wejo928]

we r daycare not parents "REAL DAYCARE"

I had a Mom tell me I need to teach her 2 yr old daughter letters & numbers because she does not have time to do it at home.
She said if she was in a "REAL DAYCARE" she would be taught and a "REAL DAYCARE" would do all the potty training.

I reminded her if she was in a "REAL DAYCARE" her copays would not be $302 behind, If she was in a :REAL DAYCARE" C&Y would of been called when you told me not to feed your baby because you are not gonna use your food stamps to buy more babyfood than wic gives you.
If you were in a "REAL DAYCARE" your a$$ would not be transported for free.
If you were in a "REAL DAYCARE" your kids would not be eating steak, shrimp, crab, porkchops and food like that.
And if you were in a real daycare your a$$ would of been terminated with all the crap you pull.
If you were in a "REAL DAYCARE" your child would not have had new coats the last 2 years, have gone garge saleing or get things on our bi-weekly trips to Target.

She shut up and said nothing else. .

She says I am not a real daycare because I am not licenced.
I have no teaching degree but do work with the children on letters, numbers and colors in daily lives. If you want education pay for Preschool.

I just wish she would leave like she threatens to do so I can take her to court for my back money.

Sorry had to vent.

[mac60]

Being licensed has nothing to do with being a "real daycare", and don't ever let anyone try to tell you otherwise. What counts is the quality of care a daycare gives, imo. She sounds like a poor excuse for a mother and talks a lot of crap.

[Daycare Mommy]

Being licensed has nothing to do with being a "real daycare", and don't ever let anyone try to tell you otherwise. What counts is the quality of care a daycare gives, imo. She sounds like a poor excuse for a mother and talks a lot of crap.

I agree with Mac60. Licensing has nothing to do with it. I actually had another parent who thought like this but she used a different criteria to decide who had a legitimate daycare and who did not. She was calling around for prices and only asked one other question. She asked if I have a bachelors degree or higher in teaching or early childhood. I gave her my answer (no, but here's what I do have, blah, blah, blah) and then she says, "I don't think people without at least 4 year degrees have any business asking for as much as those who don't have a degree." Then something about it being price gouging and it taking a lot of nerve, etc. Then she asked for me to LOWER MY PRICE since I'm underqualified to recieve such steep rates. That just blew me away. I can't remember exactly what I said to her, but she got quite piece of my mind before I hung up. I don't deal with people like that. Her kid could be a superbaby that changes it's own diapers and teaches the other children to read, and that woman could pay me 10 times my rate and it still wouldn't be enough to entice me to have to deal with her looking down on me and treating me like I'm a dog to be thrown scraps from her table. It's been about a year since she called and I'm still mad!

My point, anyone with an attitude like that gets promptly straightened out and/or sent packing.

[MarinaVanessa]

Yes I agree, sounds to me like the mom wants a free ride and is lacking in appreciation. Do you have your families on a contracts? Please say you do. You do not know how much trouble you'd be saving yourself if they were all on contracts. Be specific too. I also have a clause in there about how if subsidy does not cover everything that the parent's are required to pay the difference. You never know when their rates might change such as if she was to get a raise, promotion, more hours etc. and your payment goes down even more and then you're stuck again. Get her on a contract with these terms included and if she refuses or gives her the run-around tell her that you will no longer be able to offer care for her.

[Chickenhauler]

I agree with Mac60. Licensing has nothing to do with it. I actually had another parent who thought like this but she used a different criteria to decide who had a legitimate daycare and who did not. She was calling around for prices and only asked one other question. She asked if I have a bachelors degree or higher in teaching or early childhood. I gave her my answer (no, but here's what I do have, blah, blah, blah) and then she says, "I don't think people without at least 4 year degrees have any business asking for as much as those who don't have a degree." Then something about it being price gouging and it taking a lot of nerve, etc. Then she asked for me to LOWER MY PRICE since I'm underqualified to recieve such steep rates. That just blew me away. I can't remember exactly what I said to her, but she got quite piece of my mind before I hung up. I don't deal with people like that. Her kid could be a superbaby that changes it's own diapers and teaches the other children to read, and that woman could pay me 10 times my rate and it still wouldn't be enough to entice me to have to deal with her looking down on me and treating me like I'm a dog to be thrown scraps from her table. It's been about a year since she called and I'm still mad!

My point, anyone with an attitude like that gets promptly straightened out and/or sent packing.

Just cuz someone has a degree doesn't mean they have a clue, or are worth more.

I have a cousin with her Master's, she teaches kindergarten. She makes about half what I do.

And you know what? She's overpaid for her brains. She is dumber than a post.

But that's a whole different rant about schooling.....our current system isn't about education or knowledge, but short term memorization and regurgitation.

[GretasLittleFriends]

Just cuz someone has a degree doesn't mean they have a clue, or are worth more.

I have a cousin with her Master's, she teaches kindergarten. She makes about half what I do.

And you know what? She's overpaid for her brains. She is dumber than a post.

But that's a whole different rant about schooling.....our current system isn't about education or knowledge, but short term memorization and regurgitation.

What makes you say this???

It's 4:30a and I'm waiting for my first one to show up. Read this and started laughing. This is a major pet peeve of Chickenhauler's. You compare our schooling background and I did "so much better". I couldn't tell you a quarter of what I learned in high school, let alone in a single subject (say History). I learned how to go to school and pass tests. Retention wasn't something they stressed, checked or taught. This guy knows lots about lots of stuff, and has retained tons of knowledge.

[momofsix]

What makes you say this???

It's 4:30a and I'm waiting for my first one to show up. Read this and started laughing. This is a major pet peeve of Chickenhauler's. You compare our schooling background and I did "so much better". I couldn't tell you a quarter of what I learned in high school, let alone in a single subject (say History). I learned how to go to school and pass tests. Retention wasn't something they stressed, checked or taught. This guy knows lots about lots of stuff, and has retained tons of knowledge.

So true! My degree is in Psychology, and my dear husband thinks we should never get into any arguments because I should USE MY EDUCATION to figure out what he is REALLY thinking/feeling inside...yeah right, I never even used it to figure out my own quirks!::
ps hubby IS joking when he says this!

[Unregistered]

Just cuz someone has a degree doesn't mean they have a clue, or are worth more.

I have a cousin with her Master's, she teaches kindergarten. She makes about half what I do.

And you know what? She's overpaid for her brains. She is dumber than a post.

But that's a whole different rant about schooling.....our current system isn't about education or knowledge, but short term memorization and regurgitation.

Exactly! Education is way over rated, imo. I don't have a college degree of any type, but I have a few years of experience. Parents have always seemed pleased with how I handle things, employers have commented on my ability, etc. I am a preschool teacher at a small private preschool. I admit, my confidence takes a nose-dive at times (especially when things get chaotic) and I tell myself that someone who has been to school and received their degree could do a better job than me. That's one plus-side I can see to having a degree, to bolster your self-esteem. But so much of the time, my experience has been that someone with a degree has no common sense at all and yet freely give put-downs, mixed in with some sweet sounding comment so no one else catches on to what they're doing. Is that the difference between a degree and no degree? I don't mean anything against people who have a college degree, my main point was: Does it really make that much of a difference as it pertains to a person's ability to teach a 2-5 yr old just because they have spent thousands of dollars to receive their Early Childhood Education degree? If you're still following NAEYC guidelines, what's the difference?

[Daycare Mommy]

Just cuz someone has a degree doesn't mean they have a clue, or are worth more.

I have a cousin with her Master's, she teaches kindergarten. She makes about half what I do.

And you know what? She's overpaid for her brains. She is dumber than a post.

But that's a whole different rant about schooling.....our current system isn't about education or knowledge, but short term memorization and regurgitation.

This is SO true!

What makes you say this???

It's 4:30a and I'm waiting for my first one to show up. Read this and started laughing. This is a major pet peeve of Chickenhauler's. You compare our schooling background and I did "so much better". I couldn't tell you a quarter of what I learned in high school, let alone in a single subject (say History). I learned how to go to school and pass tests. Retention wasn't something they stressed, checked or taught. This guy knows lots about lots of stuff, and has retained tons of knowledge.

That'd be me as well. And I wasn't a happy camper in school once I picked up on the fact that I was unable to retain most of the stuff they were "teaching" me long-term.. yet I could make straight A's standing on my head whenever I felt like it. In school I learned to listen, memorize, test, get praise, forget nearly all of it, repeat. But outside of school, anything I studied on my own, my retention was great. I started college thinking it might be different since I'd be studying something I'm interested in. Nope. I fell straight back into my old habits despite the fact that I had been studying the same stuff (Early Childhood) on my own through the library with great interest for over a year before that. I stopped taking classes and started studying on my own again and after a short break I bounced back just as in love with this field as I was in the beginning. Now I have a nearly 4.0 GPA with my first year of classes done and just absolutely no desire to continue. It just seems like a tremendous waste for me. Life is short. It's only a piece of paper and in the end I know I learn more outside of school than in. If I did complete it it'd be to impress others because I know it wouldn't really mean a thing. I'd much rather be here in the real world with my children every day reading up on everything on my own. I have nothing to prove to anyone.