Time Away From the Children

[Ariana]

Do I vent online about my job, co-workers, or clients? Absolutely not. To do so would be considered unprofessional and if I were found out, I would be fired.

You have people you can complain to at your job. Other coworkers, HR department, counselling services etc. We are busines owners who are in a very high stress and demanding job. Venting is extremely therapeutic especially when you can relate to people who've been there and can help.

You would not be fired for venting if all private and personal information was not revealed. That's ridiculous!

[Ariana]

I will tell you that running a daycare is way harder than you think. You ladies can leave your jobs at work, you talk to adults, you get a lunch break, you get to have "down time" when you drive home...remember I was one of you ladies. It was the best. All I had to do was spend some time with my kids, feed them dinner and put them to bed when all the hard work was done for me.

I used to work outside the home as well and it is much harder being in business for yourself. MANY of my friends with kids couldn't wait to go back to work after their year mat leave to "get a break" (their words!!) Childcare is hard when it's your own kids and even harder when you're dealing with multiple kids who aren't your own. I think childcare providers are special people Why else would you do it if you weren't good with kids or didn't enjoy being around kids? It sure ain't for the $$ ::

[nannyde]

To stand up for parents who are getting bashed here and give a parent's perspective. It makes me sad that so many daycare providers seem to despise the parents. Why is it that when parents post here they are often told to leave? I see it says "daycare.com, a service for parents and providers."

Can you point us to a thread where a parent was asked to leave?

[mismatchedsocks]

Do I vent online about my job, co-workers, or clients? Absolutely not. To do so would be considered unprofessional and if I were found out, I would be fired.

But I sure bet you vent to your co workers AT work. I know my boyfriend is sometimes sick of hearing me vent, so I come here. Its nice to know someone else feels the way I do, or have gone through things that i have. You have co workers AT work to do that with. And this post is in the provider section, so obviously providers will be chiming in and "venting".

[laundrymom]

The closest I get is a shower to myself.

ummmm I'm sorry,... These words don't seem to compute. Shower,.... By yourself. Hmmmm you mean your bathroom doesn't have an alarm that flashes red and screaches,... " moms in the bathroom alone!!! Go make sure she doesn't feel lonely!!!!!!".


Hmmm interesting. ( )

[BigMama]

ummmm I'm sorry,... These words don't seem to compute. Shower,.... By yourself. Hmmmm you mean your bathroom doesn't have an alarm that flashes red and screaches,... " moms in the bathroom alone!!! Go make sure she doesn't feel lonely!!!!!!".


Hmmm interesting. ( )

:::::: I definitely have one of those...and my kids are teenagers!

[Unregistered]

Hi,
I am the origional unregistered poster from #12 and just got back to check this. I am relieved to here that some of you understand what I am saying and it does make me sad for those kids whose parents don't make efforts to see them. I also appreciate how hard it must be to be a daycare providor, I know that I couldn't juggle it all!

[Cat Herder]

To stand up for parents who are getting bashed here and give a parent's perspective. It makes me sad that so many daycare providers seem to despise the parents. Why is it that when parents post here they are often told to leave? I see it says "daycare.com, a service for parents and providers."

No, Please don't leave. That is not what I meant.

Your views are invaluable to us.

It is just so unfair to think we all hate our clients because of vent threads.

I think you would have a stroke if you checked out the Fire, Ems, Police, Accountant, Pilot, Physician or even Teacher forums. There is one for almost EVERY occupation. Venting is on every one of them.

[dEHmom]

ummmm I'm sorry,... These words don't seem to compute. Shower,.... By yourself. Hmmmm you mean your bathroom doesn't have an alarm that flashes red and screaches,... " moms in the bathroom alone!!! Go make sure she doesn't feel lonely!!!!!!".


Hmmm interesting. ( )

no kidding! I get in trouble because I don't close the door when I go. I say what's the point? the days I do there are kids banging on the door screaming mommmmmy!!!!!!! or they throw the door open and I get whacked in the head and my toes under the door (toilets right by the door). And when I shower, there's always someone who comes in to potty and then decides to join me. AND when it's not the kids opening the door, it's dh cause he wants to say something.

[SilverSabre25]

To stand up for parents who are getting bashed here and give a parent's perspective. It makes me sad that so many daycare providers seem to despise the parents. Why is it that when parents post here they are often told to leave? I see it says "daycare.com, a service for parents and providers."

most of us don't bash all parents. most of us only bash the parents that deserve to be bashed...and it's not even bashing precisely, because most of the time we are looking for advice on the best ways to handle difficult or stressful situations. We are blowing off steam in order to be able to handle the parents more professionally and respectfully.

I also don't think a parent has ever been "told to leave" just for sharing their opinion. We'd prefer you did it as a registered user, maybe, but we still value the other opinions. Most of us, anyway. Don't judge the whole tree by a couple apples with spots, iykwim.

[dEHmom]

Hi,
I am the origional unregistered poster from #12 and just got back to check this. I am relieved to here that some of you understand what I am saying and it does make me sad for those kids whose parents don't make efforts to see them. I also appreciate how hard it must be to be a daycare providor, I know that I couldn't juggle it all!

we ALL understand what you are saying, and thank's for coming back, and for letting us know which post you made. Please think about registering, it's great to have members like you.

Most of us providers are parents, and at some point more than likely juggled jobs with children, so we understand what the parents are going through. Sometimes it just pushes the wrong buttons when some parents take advantage of us and complain when they have 1 or 2 children they have to "deal" with when to us it's like "hello? we have 4-16 kids to "deal" with daily", and our job doesn't end when you walk out the door, it continues sometimes endlessly. As another member termed it on here before "rinse and repeat".

[SilverSabre25]

As a parent, this thread is making me feel guilty about the amount of time I do get kid free! Before DH got his new job I was leaving after bed time once a week to go get together with my sisters. I go shopping or to the library or a coffee shop without the kids a few times a month, or with only DS (he's 5 months old and doesn't really count)--do you guys really not leave your kids with your DH and go run errands on your own? Ever? Does doing that make me a bad mother in your eyes?

I also get a (DD) free week/weekend a couple times a year because my in-laws want to spend that time with her. I hate letting her go but I do enjoy the time alone with DH. I rarely seek these opportunities out, but my in-laws expect and enjoy the time with DD.

[SilverSabre25]

we ALL understand what you are saying, and thank's for coming back, and for letting us know which post you made. Please think about registering, it's great to have members like you.

Most of us providers are parents, and at some point more than likely juggled jobs with children, so we understand what the parents are going through. Sometimes it just pushes the wrong buttons when some parents take advantage of us and complain when they have 1 or 2 children they have to "deal" with when to us it's like "hello? we have 4-16 kids to "deal" with daily", and our job doesn't end when you walk out the door, it continues sometimes endlessly. As another member termed it on here before "rinse and repeat".

!!

[dEHmom]

As a parent, this thread is making me feel guilty about the amount of time I do get kid free! Before DH got his new job I was leaving after bed time once a week to go get together with my sisters. I go shopping or to the library or a coffee shop without the kids a few times a month, or with only DS (he's 5 months old and doesn't really count)--do you guys really not leave your kids with your DH and go run errands on your own? Ever? Does doing that make me a bad mother in your eyes?

I also get a (DD) free week/weekend a couple times a year because my in-laws want to spend that time with her. I hate letting her go but I do enjoy the time alone with DH. I rarely seek these opportunities out, but my in-laws expect and enjoy the time with DD.

no you are not a bad mother. And as you said it's usually after they go to bed so you're not exactly cutting into their time anyway.
My dh pulls guilt trip of "don't you want to spend time with me?"
Also, I am lucky because my mom tries to take my kids for the weekend usually once a month. So we do get lots of time together.

I've RARELY gone out, like I said, I think 3 times? once was with my mom and sis, another was to a friends house at like 10pm! and the other was another daycare providers' house the other night for a drink and was only gone 1 hour. she lives about a 2 min walk away from me.

[AfterSchoolMom]

I said that we only get nights TOGETHER without our kids a couple of times a year. However, DH and I often will do things individually while the other stays at home. DH is an avid gym goer and I participate in a Bunco group one evening per month. I'll take them with me shopping so that he can play a computer game, or he'll take them somewhere for the afternoon so that I can read a book... and at least once per year, I go to the beach with my Mom for the weekend while DH stays home, and at least once per year, DH will go somewhere for the weekend while I stay at home.

We definitely have our time alone, and I don't think anyone is a bad parent, no matter whether they work at home or outside of the home, for needing a break now and then.

I DO think that if you CHOOSE to spend every evening, every weekend, every vacation, etc. without your child, it is a sad situation. The opposite is also true. If you NEVER take a break, that's sad as well, because no one benefits from that situation.