Angry And Hurt Right Now

[awestbrook713]

I have been on here for the last few weeks asking about daycare rates/policies etc.

I finally figured out what my new rates are going to be and decided to let the parents know a few months ahead of time so they may decide if they can stay or need to find something else.

My rate: I am changing from a daily to a weekly. My daily was extremely low for my area 20 for a full day and 10 for a half. I then made it worse by giving a sibling discount I only added $10 to the full day and $5 for a half for each additional child. I am changing to a daily rate of 25 per child per day so if I have two children 5 days a week I will be charging $250.

I told all parents I will get together and discuss any issues. I just received a txt from a dcm and this is what it said:

Hi ___. I just got that paper from ----- and looked it over. I have a few issues w/ it. I feel that it is extremely high for childcare. 50 a day is quite a bit more than me or ----- can afford. If we could come up w a better arrangement I would appreciate it. I realize this is how youre making a living and I have before also but I would never have thought about charging these rates. Please get back to me as soon as you can. thanks

I responded:
I understand if you have any issues but discussing them in txt isn't what I want to do. We will set up a date for both you and ----- to be here, and we can discuss it then. I hope we can work this out. I am free any night after the kids are gone so let me know what you guys want to do.

Her response:
That is what I was getting ahold of you for. I will talk to ---- and come up with a day and time we can all meet up. Thanks

Where to start as to why I am mad.

1.She was my childrens babysitter unregistered, she charged me 25 a day for my child. She sat them infront of the tv and the toy box and never took them outside and I provided the food. I read to her children, have helped potty train her daughter feed and provide the food, give them outside time every day, and we do arts and crafts.

2. When I first enrolled her I filled out paper work to help her get assistance to pay for child care which she never turned in because her ex refused to falsify the information he had to fill out so she wouldn't get as much.

3. This txt was not her trying to set up a date this was to attack me via txt message and let me know shes not happy. I had already spoken to her about setting up the date yesterday over the phone and told her ex the same. She wrote this to give me a piece of her mind.

If she thinks this is going to get her a lower rate she is wrong. Her children are here 4- 10 hr days in the summer and I want to charge her 200 the going weekly rate for her children ages 3 and 6 is 135 and 130 I am being more then fair. I have even given a school year rate of 100 for the 3 year old and am holding the 6 yr olds spot and will only charge a $25 fee for holidays and days off of school.

I am sorry this is so long I just needed to get this out. I am shaking I am so upset, I knew I would meet opposition but this txt was uncalled for. We will sit we will talk I will explain how I came to my decision what I am doing with the children and if they still don't feel I am worth it. I have two kids whose parents do think I am worth it lined up.

[Cat Herder]

I am sorry hun.

Hopefully she will be the only one acting like that.

Sending good vibes.

[pfund2233]

Don't give into her at all!! She will push and push... trust me. At your meeting if things get heated simply tell her this is your business and your way of living and she doesn't need to stay your client if she is not happy. They are always floored when you basically tell them this is the way it is or there is the door.

[Blackcat31]

Do you have access at all to the going rate for child care providers in your area? If so, copy it down and refer to it when talking to her about your "worth" in regards to your weekly rate.

I would be really offended if I were you too! Stand your ground and if she bails on you, then advertise for a family that does appreciate all you do for their children. Don't sell yourself short because one parent doesn't want to pay for high quality child care.

[grandmom]

Repeat after me until you feel confident saying it to them:

I understand your position, this is what I need to charge.

I understand this is a price increase, this is what I need to charge.

I understand you don't want to pay this rate, this is what I need to charge.

Changing prices and policies on existing parents is so hard. Don't be surprised if they start listing the things you've bought that you could have done without, thus kept their price lower. btdt

Good luck.

[misspollywog]

((((((((HUGS))))))))

This is why I dislike the texting option. It complicates things.

I just switched over from an hourly rate to a weekly, and added some rather strict policies that I plan to stick to. But... I am only making it apply to all new families because the 2 I have will probably flee to the mountains if I try switching them over and I don't want to lose them. It isn't easy to get enrollments around here as it is. Sigh.

So I feel your pain.

At least you were brave enough to apply your new rates to the current dcf's! I am too chicken to do it.

Stand firm and remember we're all here rooting for you. Your time and EFFORT (key word here) is worth what you're charging, and you both know it. She just doesn't want to admit it!!!

[nannyde]

She just wants cheap day care. It's not very complicated and you shouldn't take it personally. It doesn't have anything to do with you or what you are worth.

She's been getting a really super low rate and that's what she wants. She will most likely leave you when she finds another low paying deal. She will just seek out someone who is new and making the same mistake with low priced base care and markedly lower discount for sibs.

As hard as it is to think of it this way you have to understand that your low discounted rate IS a big part of child care today. It's part of the economy of child care.

Her kids will move on to the next person who is offering cheap until that person raises rates. Once she raises rates they will move to the next. It's NOT about what the going rate is... it's about finding the provider that offers care for WAY less than the going rate. To her it doesn't matter if a thousand providers charge 130... and one charges 100. She doesn't care about the other thousand. She just cares about the one that charges 100.

Just be super polite to her and tell her this is your new rate. She will most likely take you up on your services until the day the rates go up. If she has to pay the "going rate" you can be SURE she won't pay it to you. If she's going to pay that much more for care she's going to want some special special for it.

You are coming from a place where you believe what you are offering is a REALLY fair deal. She ONLY looks at the actual number of dollars MORE she has to pay for what she's getting now. It's not about FAIR or your good care. She just wants the cheap. She doesn't care HOW you got to what is fair or what others are charging. She only wants to know how much more for her and can she talk you completely out of it or just do a few dollars more a week.

Just buckle up and be understanding when she says no or tries to negotiate. She already knows your good care so don't defend the raise with that. It's not personal and it's NOT convinceable... you can't convince her to pay more. She's fine with what she's paying now OR she may even believe what she does now is too much.

Lastly, I encourage you to never give rate info so far in advance. One month is plenty of notice.

[dave4him]

Quality daycare is not cheap or easy! No one on the outside seems to understand this

[nannyde]

Repeat after me until you feel confident saying it to them:

I understand your position, this is what I need to charge.

I understand this is a price increase, this is what I need to charge.

I understand you don't want to pay this rate, this is what I need to charge.

Changing prices and policies on existing parents is so hard. Don't be surprised if they start listing the things you've bought that you could have done without, thus kept their price lower. btdt

Good luck.

Grandma you rule

[Christian Mother]

I feel for you. Money always seems to be cause for problems for us. Stay true to your self. You know what your worth and a increase should not be a surprise. Specially if you haven't done one in a yr or so with your kids. The cost of living is going up each yr. That is why biz give one a yr increases in pay. Not all do but your your own boss you should be able to grant a increase 1 a yr like the rest of the working force. What I would do is call diff. daycares around you and get rates and facilities. Put it all on paper for mom and dad. Put it in front of them and tell them you are well with in your right to increase. Your not making a outrageous increase to your rate. They where used to getting a discount and now your not doing them anymore. I also would put in front of them how much it cost to do daycare and what their money pays for. If they want to argue money then tell them they could provide there own snacks, drinks and breakfast/lunch to help out with the cost. If your on the food program that won't help but you know where i am going at. My thing is that if the money is the problem there really going to have a hard time going somewhere else and being able to find care for less then what your new rates are. Not many people are doing discounts now.

[awestbrook713]

You are all so wonderful. I needed to read these comments. My husband and I discussed this and I was ready to bend and offer $20 a day per child just to try to appease her but after thinking about it I said NO. I do have the market rates and will use them to show the parents the average rates not that I think it will matter. I think she was txting me trying to talk me out of it because she is the one who is opposed not her ex and when we sit down I think there maybe a difference of opinion.

I will be polite and smile at her and tell her my rates and let her know that is the bottom line take it or leave it. At the end of the day I may be 2 dck's less but have that much stronger of a backbone. Thanks again everyone.

[daycare]

I am with grandma on this...STAND TALL! STAND FIRM!

Trust me we all make mistakes. The ones that want to get everything and give nothing are the ones that are worth losing anyways.... DONT beat yourself up.

HUGS to you!!! now take a deep breath

[mismatchedsocks]

So they were paying $200 a week and its 50 hours a week?! That is $2 an hour per kid. And you want to raise to $250 a week and still 50 hours? that is still only $2.50 an hour. She is lucky that you are that nice!!!!

Maybe add in the per hour thing at the meeting! good luck! Keep your backbone, you are worth it!

[awestbrook713]

No they are currently paying a daily rate of 20 per full day for one child 30 per full day for 2 children or 10 per half day for one child and 15 per half day for 2 children. I am going to charge them 200 a week for a 40 hr week some times more so its 2.50 per hour per child. Not that much when you break it down. Thats for the summer. The school year rate will be $100 a week for the 3 yr old and I will only charge them 25 for the days the 6 yr old is here. Granted I know the 3 yr old is here less hours during the school year but I had to set a rate and $25 a day it is.

[thatdivalady]

I totally agree with the above posts. As she even stated...this is YOUR business. Lay down the rules and let her hit the door if she is unwilling to abide by them. : )