One Of The Joys Of Owning My Own Business

[wdmmom]

I'm glad you feel so good about helping the less fortunate. Sadly, I don't see this as being something to be happy about let alone brag about.

There is no way I would ever offer a family 50% off no matter what. I might do 20% but 50%...never!

You're best bet is to put an expiration date on this deal! For example: 3 months is how long you have to get on your feet and your rate will go back to what you were paying. And, remember, the expiration date might very well be their last day of daycare.

This DCM now knows that you are only going to charge her 1/2 price so she's going to expect special or discounted for the duration of her child's stay now.

Definitely not something I would be proud of or feel good about. Not when she can blab to her friends that you are only charging "X" amount of dollars a week now and word of mouth travels so friends of friends will find out they can get cheap too.

[MarinaVanessa]

Personally I think it's great. One thing that I will say however is not to expect anything in return. Not that it matters because if you're anything like me and I did something like this just the thought that I did something for someone else is enough for me. Even if I were to be taken advantage of sometime down the road I could at least say that I did a nice thing for someone KWIM?

You can always set a time limit an once that time has passed revisit the arrangement and talk about how things are going. If she starts working a little more, for example, you can raise her weekly rate up by a few to several dollars etc. I would also make sure to tell her not to tell anyone that she's getting a break, that could be bad news for you. But all in all I thinks it's very nice that you would do this for someone in need. Maybe you can even work something out and ask her to help you out in DC?

I did this once for a young mom that went from full-time to part-time work. She was also going to school as a nurse so she wanted to find full-time work. We worked out a discount that she could afford and kept track of the rest of what she owed. Then she'd come and "volunteer" to assist, clean my house or cook etc. We did it for 2 months until she found a FT job and got her 1st paycheck. Not sure if it would work for you but it's an option.

[nannyde]

I'm on year 24, and have had only one mom of about 347 families who took the kind of advantage of me that you describe Nanny. Maybe I'm lucky? How many have taken advantage of you to make you feel so strongly about this? I'm sure people here aren't that different than there.

Well I haven't had a fraction of the number of families you have had.

With your math you have had an average of 14 different families per year. With my eighteen years, if I were to have a comparable business it would mean that I would have 260 families.

I've never counted but I'm guessing I have had around sixtyish total so about a fourth of what you have had per year.

My first year I allowed pay at the end of the week and had a couple leave without notice but after getting burned.. I learned... I get paid upfront and I don't discount. I have a great contract and I don't play. I also do not discuss money with them. I wouldn't have this convo with a parent and I don't have a client who would even take me up on it if I did offer it. 50 percent off of a slot here wouldn't even pay the cost of housing the kid.

You had 347 DIFFERENT families in 24 years? Am I reading that right?

[kendallina]

I'm sure this mom appreciates this so much! Half fee is better than no fee, absolutely! I would probably put a time limit on it, as others have suggested, but this really shows the great relationship that you have with this family and I hope it works out for her and you.

[Childminder]

Silver,

I think what you did was indeed a kind and compassionate thing to do. I agree that half is indeed better that nothing. I have also over the years performed similar acts of kindness because of a fondness towards the family or my own personal need for charitable feelings. Almost all of the parents have shown an appreciation of what was done and remain to this day a valued client or associate. You could think of it as your way to give a financial bailout during these tough economical times. =) Reaping what you sow.

I might suggest that you consider an amendment to her contract that will make known to all parties that when/if circumstances change, the rate will be adjusted.

[MyAngels]

A DCM called me just now. She told me that her son's father backed out on them and is no longer helping them out. As such, she said that she was really sad but she just couldn't afford daycare anymore. She told me that she'd be trying to find a different (higher paying) job, and trying legal means to get child support, and she would try to bring him back when she could.

I made a snap decision--I asked if there was anything I could do to help, maybe give her a break on the rate until she gets back on her feet. She said that she and the dad had each been paying half and that was really all she could afford. So, I offered to charge her only half for awhile until she gets back on her feet.

She was so grateful, I think she was almost in tears. I feel so good, being able to help a single mom out when she really needs it. It will be tough for us, as we are barely squeaking by as it is, but we do what we gotta do. Clients are hard to come by around here these days, and GOOD clients like this family are even harder to come by. I love the boy and he's been here for a year now.

If I worked for someone else, I wouldn't have been able to make that decision to help someone out who needs it, to do a kindness to someone in trouble. I have done my time working for a heartless large corporation...and I hated it. I like being a small business, I like helping out when it's warranted. I like being able to make decisions for myself.

(Besides, half the fee is way better than no fee.)

I've done something similar before - not quite a 50% discount, but a lower rate for a single mom. Not only did this girl turn into one of my best families ever (she eventually remarried and had more children, all paying market rate), but she has referred several equally good families to me.

Good for you for making a decision that you are comfortable with, and for helping someone out just because you can. I do believe that what goes around, comes around, and at some point your kindness will be repaid.

[SunflowerMama]

I didn't read all the replies but I think it's AWESOME what you did for her! What a compassionate and selfless decision.

She sounds like the type of mom who will most certainly start paying more once she's back on her feet.

You've definitely got some positive karma headed your way.

[cheerfuldom]

I hope everything works out for you and this mom!

My worry would be that now, with the discount, she needs to find a job that really makes good money because she has to take into account that the daycare rate will be something she has never paid for for herself (for my understanding). It may work out better for her to stay at her current job and keep getting the discount for as long as possible and then use her backup plan (whatever else she was going to do before you made the discount offer) if you say something. I don't think every person does stuff like this intentionally. But a lot of it happens when you are looking out for number one and unfortunately, other people get the short end of the stick.

Anyway, I do hope that this mom is the exception out there. There are too many people that are quick to take advantage of their daycare provider and makes providers not want to take a chance on any parent. Keep us updated! Hoping for the best!

[momofsix]

You're right, that is a benefit of owning our own business. I also don't see you as "bragging", just happy you could help someone out
Of all the families that I have discounted rates for, almost all (only1 exception) have willingly on their own started paying me more when their circumstances changed! I was surprised by this myself! I also heard many, many words of appreciation from the families that were helped.
Most good people will appreciate when someone helps them out. I know when my dh first started working in ministry he took a huge pay cut. There was someone who chose to remain anonymous that blessed us in a tremendous way financially 3 years in a row! Being the recipient of a gift like that is such a blesing and so humbling. It makes you want to "pass it on!"
That is a great thing you are able to do for her and I hope she appreciates it!

[laundrymom]

Yes, the first 20 yrs I did part time and full time care. For 7 years I did 24 hour care. So I would service as many as 23 children
per day. Some were daily some hourly. Half were full time plus 3 schoolagers per day. Sometimes that was split into 6 families. I'm allowed 10 plus 3 SA kids at any given time.

I just rechecked my books, and I was wrong, I just signed my 348th child in august. I number my " childcare children" roster.

Well I haven't had a fraction of the number of families you have had.

With your math you have had an average of 14 different families per year. With my eighteen years, if I were to have a comparable business it would mean that I would have 260 families.

I've never counted but I'm guessing I have had around sixtyish total so about a fourth of what you have had per year.

My first year I allowed pay at the end of the week and had a couple leave without notice but after getting burned.. I learned... I get paid upfront and I don't discount. I have a great contract and I don't play. I also do not discuss money with them. I wouldn't have this convo with a parent and I don't have a client who would even take me up on it if I did offer it. 50 percent off of a slot here wouldn't even pay the cost of housing the kid.

You had 347 DIFFERENT families in 24 years? Am I reading that right?

[newtodaycare22]

I had a single mom who lost her job. She wanted to pull her kid for a few weeks until she got a new job. She swore she'd be back but she couldn't put money down to keep her spot-She needed it to make sure they had an apartment and food. You know what? I told her that I'd keep her daughter for free until she got a new job. I cannot explain the gratitude she displayed.

She was out of work 3 weeks and then landed a great position. She's been here ever since and paid on time every week (or early). Next week I am taking an unpaid day off for a family wedding and she told me that she WANTED to pay me because I deserved more days off.

I'm with you on the kindess-there are SOME people who are worth it.

[permanentvacation]

Wow! I thought I was the only one who thought NannyD was a snippy know-it-all twit! Guess I was wrong! I also have noticed that she doesn't have a kind word about doing a good deed. Just like someone said in a previous post, she does act like parents are out to screw us over and are simply out to get us. Yes, we are in this business to make money, however, this business does often have a very fine business/personal line that sometimes does need to be crossed into the personal side a time or two. I think that those of us who either live in an area where many people are in a lower income area or simply have a client or two that falls on hard times, when we find it in our heart to help them out financially by giving them a price break, we do not expect anything in return! It seems to me that NannyD can't simply be a good samaritian at all! She always wants something out of it! That's not how I was raised. I was raised to help those in need. I have watched a couple of kids for free - different reasons for each family - one time I watched a couple of families for free because I moved and couldn't charge them until I got my new license - one because a parent lost their job, and two others for different reasons. I have also given food to a couple of my families, watched a couple of kids on the weekend for free because the mother had to work and couldn't afford to pay extra for the weekend. No, these parents are not running around telling their friends that I do this for them and I am not getting clients just so they can use me. I've done this in Florida and in 2 different counties in Maryland. So, no, the parents are not telling others that I will watch their kids for free. They just appreciated that I helped them in their time of need. When they got back on their feet, they paid me the regular fee. Now, like I said, I am in daycare to make money, so I don't watch every child for free, but if something happens and one of my parents needs help, if I can, I help them - and DON'T EXPECT ANYTHING IN RETURN!

My parents and children have always loved me and the care/education that I give the children. Many of my parents have referred me to their friends/co-workers and offered to put my daycare cards out for me to help me advertise. I have always (except when living in an apartment - after a divorce, that's where the ex put me! I knew I wouldn't make the income I usually make there!) made a decent income. I have often had an assistant (I made enough money to be able to hire an assistant). I had a cleaning service for a while - I didn't like some things they did, - let the dust from the ceiling fan fall into my baby's crib and then left it there! is one example - so I got rid of them. I seem to be THE ONE to call in my area if you are considering starting your own daycare. I have suggested to some of the parents on an interview that maybe they should start a daycare themselves and have helped some of them through the process of becoming a licensed provider. I have also received many calls out of the blue from people who say that someone they talked to told them to call me because they wanted to find out how to start a daycare. I have helped my one friend pick out everything in her daycare then helped her arrange everything in the room. So, I have 20 years of owning/operating my own successful daycare including employees, while helping others become licensed daycare providers, and still am able to find it in my heart and wallet to occassionally help a parent in need. Oh, and I've been a single mother for the past 5 or so years.

Maybe that's what NannyD hasn't done. Maybe she has never been on the other side of the fence and seen how it is to be broke and need the help and kindness of others. Or maybe she was completely broke and busted her butt to get on top and will be damned if anyone is going to try to take any piece of it away from her.

As far as the original post, good for you! Like you said, it is hard to find good clients, so if this client is worth keeping and you are able to help them out for a while, in the end, you both win. If you let them go, you would have to go through the hassle of advertising - which can cost money, interviewing, then hoping the new family works out. If they don't you have to start the process all over again - what a pain! It's nice for you to offer to help your client and hopefully it won't take her too long until she can afford to pay your regular rate on her own.

[Blackcat31]

Ya know, I 've been reading this thread with interest due to the varying opinions and points of view but I have to say that I think it is completley unnecessary to begin calling people names. Neither Silver or Nan called each other anything. They each simply pointed out why they do what they do......even if the other didn't see it that way.

I am embarrassed that members have now resorted to name calling. I honestly thought we, as child care providers and role models for children, would follow our own rules and state our comments and concerns in a respecful manner as we expect our daycare children to do.

Calling some one a "know it all twit" is abslutely unnecessary, disrespectful and really rude. Nan's posts may come of as sharp and to the point for some, but in my personal experience they have NEVER been disrespectful or resorted to calling anyone names.

[mema]

Good for you! You have the "feeling" and if you trust your gut and it comes back to bite you in the bum, well then, lesson learned! But I think it's great, especially if it's a great family already! When my kids were in care my hubby got deployed. I didn't ask for anything, but our DCP offered us a discount. I appreciated it sooo much! It was one less thing to worry about at that time. When he ended up get promoted I made sure to go back to what we were paying and added in a little more each week to make up the back pay until I was caught up to what we should've paid. She totally didn't expect full pay until he was home and back to work and definately didn't expect the back pay, but was greatful that I didn't take advantage. My son also ended up being admitted to the hospital during this time and she charged me only 1/2 pay for the days he was out instead of full! I have since paid it forward with a family I have. They hit a rough patch and we set up a new plan. They paid 75% for a few weeks.

[WImom]

That's great that you can do that. I'm sure she will be forever grateful to you.