Have You Ever Been Accused Of Not Feeding A Child Enough?!

[wdmmom]

I have a DCM that comfronted me yesterday about me not feeding her son enough and complaining that he's hungry when he gets home.

My response was, "Well of course he is...It's almost dinner time!"

I follow the food program guidelines and I've been giving this child a couple ounces more of food/milk every single day.

DCM admitted to me yesterday that she doesn't like that everything is portion controlled. She said she just feeds him until he doesn't want anymore! (And you have to wonder why obesity is such a problem?!) In my defense, I told her that any home daycare on the food program will do the same thing...so will centers...so do schools!

This child is 1 year old. He can not sit up on his own, he can not crawl and he can not pull himself up. And, in doing my own height/weight measurements, he is in the 93rd percentile for weight and the 19th percentile for height.

I also found out that his recommended milk intake should be between 16 and 24 ounces per day and she's giving him anywhere from 16-18 ounces in the morning before he even comes to my house!!!!

I really wonder if this child can't do the things he should be doing at this age because he's too big?! Of course the mom doesn't seem worried and says he'll do whatever he wants to do when he's good and ready!

Have any of you been confronted about overfeeding/underfeeding?! How did you handle it?

[AnythingsPossible]

I have, but not in a blaming type of way. The DCM just makes comments sometimes about how much DCB eats when he gets home, and I always tell her rather he has eaten here or not. The other day, he didn't want to eat anything I had prepared and had only had a serving of strawberries that day because that is what he decided he was willing to eat that day.
DCM is aware that they are served their meals and they can eat or not, but I will not fix anything else. I have such a picky group right now that I am throwing away more food then anything else.
I would just make sure she is aware of what you are serving and possibly make a copy of the food program guidelines to give her.

[morgan24]

I have been only it was more like accusing me of withholding breakfast. Dcd came in the morning and said the little man told his Mom that you won't feed him breakfast. I said reallyyyy. Then I said to little man in front of dcd. Why don't you tell the whole story, which was on the way to my house he was eating poptarts, then when I served breakfast he wasn't hungry. Then around 10:00 he would say okay I'm ready for breakfast now. I told him he had to wait until 10:30 for his lunch. He ate lunch at 10:30 because the preschool bus picked him up at 11:00. Then dcd says okay dcm just was worried that you weren't feeding him.

In you situation I think your response was perfect. He should be getting hungry around that time for dinner. I think a lot of kids don't really know what it feels like to be hungry, not starving but just hungry. They always have a snack or juice. Sounds like dcm doesn't want to have to feed him right away when she gets home and really that is her problem not yours. I would just keep feeding him the way you have been.

[caligirl]

IMO it has nothing to do with the child's weight, unless he is insanely obese. But from what you are describing, he isn't. I have a little one right now, 9 mo, 28lbs and she is right on the money with what she should be doing at this age. There is more to it than his weight. So he isn't sitting up, crawling or pulling himself up at a year? I'd be more concerned about that than anything else if he were my child. Has she taken him in for his one-year check up yet? And if so, what did the doctor say?

As for feeding the kids. I feed them the recommend amount in the food program guidelines. However, there are some children who are a little hungrier than others, and when I have kids that need more, I give them more of the veggies, or fruit to help fill their little tummy's. Not a whole lot more, but one more serving of the veggie or fruit.

I have had parents in the past tell me that their child was hungry when they got home, but I remind them, that snack time was at 2:30 and they are getting home at 5:30, so it's been 3 hours since they last ate, so of course they are hungry. They've been running around playing, burning through that food they ate 3 hours before.

[LittleD]

When my kids were in daycare, my son would be sooo hungry when I'd pick him up. But it was 2 hours after snack time (I am guessing), so it was no wonder. I used to be worried she wasn't feeding him enough a snack. I asked one time "What and when did he eat last?" She said "Öh he had a granola bar a little while ago" (no wonder why he was hungry)I just ended up having a snack waiting for him as soon as he walked in the door so I could have a few mintues at least to cook dinner.
Same thing goes here, our last snack is at 3:00pm, and the kids who have to wait til 5pm to be picked up often start complaining about how hungry they are 5 mins before pick up.

[littlemommy]

I had a daycare dad text me a few weeks ago asking if his girls eat good for lunch. I said yes, as they are usually the first ones done and asking for seconds. They tend to be picky, so I give a small amount at first, and after I know they like it I give them the rest to equal the recommended amount. He said they are always complaining on the way home that they are hungry. We eat at 11-11:30, and they get picked up at 2. Snack is usually served at 2:30-3, so they miss that when they are here.

A couple days later he texted just to ask how they were. I said they were finishing up lunch and he said to "feed them well. they are bottomless pits."

[nannyde]

IMO it has nothing to do with the child's weight, unless he is insanely obese.

There's a 74 percent difference between his height and weight percentiles. That's clinically VERY significant.

He should be a couple of INCHES taller to accomodate that weight and he's just a new one year old.

We HAVE to start addressing obesity in infants.

[wdmmom]

I think his weight is hindering his ability to move more than what he is. And, yes...he's been in for his 1 year old physical. Apparently the doctor didn't say anything about his inability to do what he should be doing at his age. He was also born 6 weeks early, not that I think that is an excuse for him not to be crawling or sitting up.

I, too, think DCM is not only overfeeding him but doesn't want to feed him right after getting home everyday. I also think she is using food to soothe her son because if he cries or screams, she's admittedly told me she will coddle him and give him a bottle or a snack.

SAD!

[youretooloud]

I don't do portion control. I feed the kids til the food is gone. But, if I have kids who overeat, I'll do some sort of portion control. "You can have more carrots if you are still hungry".

Yesterday, out of pure curiosity, I kept feeding and feeding my overeater. She's 15 months old, and only 18lbs. So, I figured I'd see if she had a stopping point. She doesn't. She will literally keep eating until the food stops coming. She doesn't care what it is. Beans, Limas, peas, pasta, it doesn't matter... she will eat playdough if that's what I feed her. After lunch, she will go after everybody else's food. Then, she'll crawl under the table and eat the food that fell.

I wonder if some kids just don't have a natural "full" sensor?

[laundrymom]

I truly do not think most people KNOW what a child sized serving is. most sippie cups are 9 to 10 ounces, parents assume that means it is a serving. For a 2 yr old it is 2 1/2 times the serving size.!

Also, a 2 yr old doesnt NEED an entire banana, ! plus 10 ounces of milk and a pb sandwich (both pieces) plus some applesauce for breakfast,... I have the hardest time with portion sizes. And getting parents to believe me,..

[Cat Herder]

I think the problem comes from Parents not fully understanding the difference between a Daycare Snack and a Meal.

A Snack, here, means one serving of grain, one serving of fruit/vegetable/protein and 4-6 ounces of juice.

It really is a small amount.

[MommyMuffin]

I have never been accused but my kids are so picky.

I feed them according to the food program. Most of the time they only eat the fruit. They ask for seconds of fruit and I tell them after they finish their plate. They never do and then they say they are done. IF they did eat all their food and ask for seconds I would give them more.

I serve snack at 3:30 and the last pick up is 5:30. They are hungry at pick up. But I still dont want to serve a third snack for the day!!!

[Crazy8]

not a problem here... I don't provide lunch, so if there is an issue parent can send a larger lunch in with the child, but really, if they are getting home at 5-5:30pm and snack was hours earlier that would of course mean they should be hungry. They will survive the half hour or so till dinner!!

I also provide a daily sheet for each child and circle if they ate all, some or none. This tells parents if the child liked what they sent, etc.

[momofsix]

I've never been accused by anyone. I don't follow serving size guidelines though. They get to eat if they're hungry. so often I find as kids go through growth spurts their appetite really increases, I'd hate to not let them have the calories they need! (just as when they're not feeling good or moving as much their appetite decreases) I've never had any obese kids though so maybe that would change the way I do things. Most of my infants have been quite heavy (even my own when they nursed only!) but once they started walking they evened out.

Have you ever looked at the serving size on a container of ice cream?
1/2 cup
I'm just getting started with that!::

[meganlavonnesmommy]

I dont do portion control either. They can eat until the food is gone, or they are hungry. I truly believe that sometimes kids are hungrier than other times. If we played extra hard, or if they didnt eat much breakfast.

But I do not give seconds until all their other componants are gone. Like today, we had: Scrambled eggs, hashbrowns, pancakes, grapes and broiled tomatoes. Everyone wanted seconds of pancakes and grapes, which they were allowed, once they ate all their eggs, hashbrowns and tomatoes. Once they did that, only two of them wanted more pancakes, the others were full. But I'm not going to say no if they want more pancakes or grapes, if they ate everything else.