Venting Thread

[CountryRoads]

Dck (not potty trained AT ALL) shows up in underwear today because according to dcm "she refused to wear a pull-up this morning."

:confused:

I'll never understand some parents.

[Snowmom]

Dck (not potty trained AT ALL) shows up in underwear today because according to dcm "she refused to wear a pull-up this morning."

:confused:

I'll never understand some parents.

5 minutes before pick up, I think you should change her back into her underwear.
Tell mom: "She went through 6 diapers today but she knew you were coming to pick her up and she told me mom said she doesn't have to wear diapers at home, so I changed her back into her underwear for you."

[CeriBear]

I just need to rant here. Yesterday was one of my roughest days in the 4 years I have been teaching 3-4 year olds at a center. First of all five of the children didn’t sleep or even rest during naptime. One child had been given a new medicine that morning and one of the side effects is insomnia and hyperactivity. He was nervous and jittery all morning and during nap/rest time I couldn’t get him to lie still or even be quiet. Four other children did not nap and three of them were restless and moving about on their cots, kicking their feet up in the air, playing with their pillows, and asking me when it would be time to get up. I was so busy trying to keep the child who was having the reaction to the medicine relaxed and on his cot that I had to basically tune out the other noise and hope the non nappers didn’t wake others up. I have a couple of kids who really need a nap and sleep the entire two hours. It might not have been as bad if I hadn’t had a sub with me. She didn’t know much about preschoolers as she works in the young toddler room. After rest time I thought things might get better but the children were noisy, one of them got mad and spilled his juice on purpose, and girl drama so bad in the home living center that I had to close it down. To make matters worse I had a headache so the noise bothered me. Normally I have a high tolerance for noise as long as they are not being mean to each other or shouting. I was talking with a parent and I couldn’t really hear them because a group of kids in the block area were being loud so I had to say excuse me for a minute to the parent and turn around and tell my class that they needed to use inside voices. At the end of the day when all the classes combine in one room ( fifteen minutes before closing) a toddler amused herself by dumping out several tubs of toys while I was tying a little girls shoes. Sorry for the long rant but yesterday was rough.

[springv]

:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:
Here's my week:
Tuesday, child got mad and bullied the other children so they had to sit in timeout and proceeded to cuss the teacher, hit and anything they could possibly think of so parent was called and talked to the child and was told if they was called again it would be a 30 day suspension because this has been going on for at least six months. And owner has had a meeting with the child's parent and tried to work on a solution and it went well. Parent also contacted a mental health specialist and the child has gone twice and we asked what happened at the second appointment and parent said they suggested taking toys away, timeout and other methods of discipline which we do but doesn't work. Tuesday afternoon, parent got called during rest time because child was acting up and parent came and got child and the administrator was sitting at the desk and didn't remind parent of what was said at the meeting regarding two calls and a 30 day suspension and she came in thursday and brought child and administrator was off and got told that he couldn't stay because he was suspended and mom stated that she was never told that on tuesday and that if she had known she would've made alternate arrangements for care because she has to work. Our administrator was sitting on her tail and didn't proceed to talk to the parent face to face. It was rude and very disrespectful and this isn't the first time she has been like this towards parents or other employees.

[Ariana]

Termed family is using their two weeks.

God give me strength to survive the next two weeks with this kid and this family

[Lil_Diddle]

Parents forgetting we are human too

I run an in home childcare in my basement, completely separate from my living area. A have an assistant and a back up substitute. It is my number one goal to be reliable. I’ve worked through a lot of things that I know some of these parents have called out for at their own job. In fact, I can count on one hand how many times I’ve closed unexpectedly, with little to no notice. I make it work. Even if I’m home sick or my children are home sick, we get no peace with the littles downstairs. But we make it work.

But heaven forbid I need to close, all I hear is “what am I supposed to do?” Which to me just seems so unappreciative and just rude. One of the first things I tell these parents is this is a home daycare, always be prepared with a back up plan. Obviously, my assistant and sub are unavailable, I have no idea what you should do. Sometimes it takes all I have to bite my tongue. And I end up apologizing!!! I shouldn’t have to apologize.

I apologized to an angry parent when I took a day off after my first miscarriage. I opened the daycare and came back to close on the day of my grandmothers funeral. I sang songs and played with their kids when my marriage was on the brink of divorce. I’ve worked through major headaches, and when parents come in I put on a happy face and smile like nothing is wrong. When my first grand baby was being born, I usually open at 7 but my assistant or sub couldn’t come in until 8. I had parents griping about that. Two weeks ago I came down with strep. I worked it out with my subs that daycare can be open as usual. In fact I could have used a personal day and got paid, but instead I paid for a sub to be there the full day. Now the night before I took my car to be dropped off at the shop for repairs. So my car wasn’t home. Do you know how grateful these parents were. Firstly only one family asked how I was feeling and told me to feel better. Another accidentally sent me a text ABOUT me, and how she and another parent were talking and my car was not even home. Not sure who that message was meant for, but apparently these parents have conversations about me. I hope she felt terrible when I replied. Now, I have plans to take next Monday off while my child is out of school. Already made plans with her and my nieces. My sub was set to cover me for the day. Well, she is human too and her daughter has to have tubes put in that day. If she doesn’t take this appointment it could be two more weeks to get her in. I completely understand. My other assistant has plans for the day as well, and Mondays are her day off and we have an agreement where she gets no school days off. It was hard, and I debated but I finally decided I would keep my plans with my children and nieces and use my FIRST personal day of the school year. (I go by school years. Not calendar years). Almost a weeks notice. I sent that message out 12 hours ago and only one response. (I should mention today was a snow day, so only two families were here) so now I’m stressed that my families are angry with me, talking behind my back. Thank goodness for my talk with my assistant who convinced me to take the day and told me I deserve it.

This current group of families, is just not my favorite. They are not personable. I only have one family that makes me feel appreciated and thanks me for all the work I do with their child. I know there is no solution other than to vent, but honestly I think the way the parents behave is causing me to burn out more than the actual working with children. I want to be seen as a person rather than just a service. I thought that’s why people chose home childcare, because it is more personable.

[Josiegirl]

I run an in home childcare in my basement, completely separate from my living area. A have an assistant and a back up substitute. It is my number one goal to be reliable. I’ve worked through a lot of things that I know some of these parents have called out for at their own job. In fact, I can count on one hand how many times I’ve closed unexpectedly, with little to no notice. I make it work. Even if I’m home sick or my children are home sick, we get no peace with the littles downstairs. But we make it work.

But heaven forbid I need to close, all I hear is “what am I supposed to do?” Which to me just seems so unappreciative and just rude. One of the first things I tell these parents is this is a home daycare, always be prepared with a back up plan. Obviously, my assistant and sub are unavailable, I have no idea what you should do. Sometimes it takes all I have to bite my tongue. And I end up apologizing!!! I shouldn’t have to apologize.

I apologized to an angry parent when I took a day off after my first miscarriage. I opened the daycare and came back to close on the day of my grandmothers funeral. I sang songs and played with their kids when my marriage was on the brink of divorce. I’ve worked through major headaches, and when parents come in I put on a happy face and smile like nothing is wrong. When my first grand baby was being born, I usually open at 7 but my assistant or sub couldn’t come in until 8. I had parents griping about that. Two weeks ago I came down with strep. I worked it out with my subs that daycare can be open as usual. In fact I could have used a personal day and got paid, but instead I paid for a sub to be there the full day. Now the night before I took my car to be dropped off at the shop for repairs. So my car wasn’t home. Do you know how grateful these parents were. Firstly only one family asked how I was feeling and told me to feel better. Another accidentally sent me a text ABOUT me, and how she and another parent were talking and my car was not even home. Not sure who that message was meant for, but apparently these parents have conversations about me. I hope she felt terrible when I replied. Now, I have plans to take next Monday off while my child is out of school. Already made plans with her and my nieces. My sub was set to cover me for the day. Well, she is human too and her daughter has to have tubes put in that day. If she doesn’t take this appointment it could be two more weeks to get her in. I completely understand. My other assistant has plans for the day as well, and Mondays are her day off and we have an agreement where she gets no school days off. It was hard, and I debated but I finally decided I would keep my plans with my children and nieces and use my FIRST personal day of the school year. (I go by school years. Not calendar years). Almost a weeks notice. I sent that message out 12 hours ago and only one response. (I should mention today was a snow day, so only two families were here) so now I’m stressed that my families are angry with me, talking behind my back. Thank goodness for my talk with my assistant who convinced me to take the day and told me I deserve it.

This current group of families, is just not my favorite. They are not personable. I only have one family that makes me feel appreciated and thanks me for all the work I do with their child. I know there is no solution other than to vent, but honestly I think the way the parents behave is causing me to burn out more than the actual working with children. I want to be seen as a person rather than just a service. I thought that’s why people chose home childcare, because it is more personable.

Oh wow, it's got to be hard working with such unappreciative disrespectful parents. Any way at all you can start searching for new dcfs? Replace one at a time? At the very least, I think I'd send home letters to all(except the 1 understanding family ), explaining to them this is exactly why they need dependable back-up plans in place, you are an in-home provider offering personal family care, life happens to us all and you WILL need to take time off as it happens, due to illness and unexpected life situations. They either need to hire their own personal nanny(and hopefully someone who never ever gets sick or has a life)or bring their child to a center. I'd come right out and tell them because obviously bending over backwards to be there for them hasn't done a thing for their appreciation. People like this pi$$ me off to no end. Yeh, it may be frustrating to play this juggle act as a parent but they also need to be more understanding too. And these are probably the 1st ones to take a day off 'just because'.
I once had a dcm who asked me 'whatever will I do?' when I closed for a week because my mom died. It took all I had not to tell her to go directly to he!! and I didn't care what she did.
PLEASE don't be afraid your dcps will be angry; don't let their emotions and self-produced issues due to lack of pre-planning become your prison because you WILL suffer burn-out to the 100th degree.
Good luck!!

[CountryRoads]

I run an in home childcare in my basement, completely separate from my living area. A have an assistant and a back up substitute. It is my number one goal to be reliable. I’ve worked through a lot of things that I know some of these parents have called out for at their own job. In fact, I can count on one hand how many times I’ve closed unexpectedly, with little to no notice. I make it work. Even if I’m home sick or my children are home sick, we get no peace with the littles downstairs. But we make it work.

But heaven forbid I need to close, all I hear is “what am I supposed to do?” Which to me just seems so unappreciative and just rude. One of the first things I tell these parents is this is a home daycare, always be prepared with a back up plan. Obviously, my assistant and sub are unavailable, I have no idea what you should do. Sometimes it takes all I have to bite my tongue. And I end up apologizing!!! I shouldn’t have to apologize.

I apologized to an angry parent when I took a day off after my first miscarriage. I opened the daycare and came back to close on the day of my grandmothers funeral. I sang songs and played with their kids when my marriage was on the brink of divorce. I’ve worked through major headaches, and when parents come in I put on a happy face and smile like nothing is wrong. When my first grand baby was being born, I usually open at 7 but my assistant or sub couldn’t come in until 8. I had parents griping about that. Two weeks ago I came down with strep. I worked it out with my subs that daycare can be open as usual. In fact I could have used a personal day and got paid, but instead I paid for a sub to be there the full day. Now the night before I took my car to be dropped off at the shop for repairs. So my car wasn’t home. Do you know how grateful these parents were. Firstly only one family asked how I was feeling and told me to feel better. Another accidentally sent me a text ABOUT me, and how she and another parent were talking and my car was not even home. Not sure who that message was meant for, but apparently these parents have conversations about me. I hope she felt terrible when I replied. Now, I have plans to take next Monday off while my child is out of school. Already made plans with her and my nieces. My sub was set to cover me for the day. Well, she is human too and her daughter has to have tubes put in that day. If she doesn’t take this appointment it could be two more weeks to get her in. I completely understand. My other assistant has plans for the day as well, and Mondays are her day off and we have an agreement where she gets no school days off. It was hard, and I debated but I finally decided I would keep my plans with my children and nieces and use my FIRST personal day of the school year. (I go by school years. Not calendar years). Almost a weeks notice. I sent that message out 12 hours ago and only one response. (I should mention today was a snow day, so only two families were here) so now I’m stressed that my families are angry with me, talking behind my back. Thank goodness for my talk with my assistant who convinced me to take the day and told me I deserve it.

This current group of families, is just not my favorite. They are not personable. I only have one family that makes me feel appreciated and thanks me for all the work I do with their child. I know there is no solution other than to vent, but honestly I think the way the parents behave is causing me to burn out more than the actual working with children. I want to be seen as a person rather than just a service. I thought that’s why people chose home childcare, because it is more personable.

I'm so sorry you are dealing with rude, unappreciative parents!

I wish parents understood how much we sacrifice. I have in my contract that back-up care is encouraged for instances like last minute closures, doctor appointments, etc.(But, no one reads those things ) I've had to learn that I'm entitled to be closed whenever I want/need to be and it is the parents' problem if they have no back-up.

It's parents like the ones you are describing that have made me learn that. They take off work for vacations, doctor appointments, even days to do absolutely nothing, but for some reason it's frowned upon if we providers do the same thing.

It's frustrating and one of the things I struggle with in this line of work everyday. I always tell dh that this job would be so much better if we never had to deal with the parents ::

Don't feel bad AT ALL about taking that day off with your child! You will regret it if you don't.

Oh, and the families that got caught talking about you (hopefully it wasn't anything horrible?!), should be so embarrassed. I know I would be.

[Ac114]

I run an in home childcare in my basement, completely separate from my living area. A have an assistant and a back up substitute. It is my number one goal to be reliable. I’ve worked through a lot of things that I know some of these parents have called out for at their own job. In fact, I can count on one hand how many times I’ve closed unexpectedly, with little to no notice. I make it work. Even if I’m home sick or my children are home sick, we get no peace with the littles downstairs. But we make it work.

But heaven forbid I need to close, all I hear is “what am I supposed to do?” Which to me just seems so unappreciative and just rude. One of the first things I tell these parents is this is a home daycare, always be prepared with a back up plan. Obviously, my assistant and sub are unavailable, I have no idea what you should do. Sometimes it takes all I have to bite my tongue. And I end up apologizing!!! I shouldn’t have to apologize.

I apologized to an angry parent when I took a day off after my first miscarriage. I opened the daycare and came back to close on the day of my grandmothers funeral. I sang songs and played with their kids when my marriage was on the brink of divorce. I’ve worked through major headaches, and when parents come in I put on a happy face and smile like nothing is wrong. When my first grand baby was being born, I usually open at 7 but my assistant or sub couldn’t come in until 8. I had parents griping about that. Two weeks ago I came down with strep. I worked it out with my subs that daycare can be open as usual. In fact I could have used a personal day and got paid, but instead I paid for a sub to be there the full day. Now the night before I took my car to be dropped off at the shop for repairs. So my car wasn’t home. Do you know how grateful these parents were. Firstly only one family asked how I was feeling and told me to feel better. Another accidentally sent me a text ABOUT me, and how she and another parent were talking and my car was not even home. Not sure who that message was meant for, but apparently these parents have conversations about me. I hope she felt terrible when I replied. Now, I have plans to take next Monday off while my child is out of school. Already made plans with her and my nieces. My sub was set to cover me for the day. Well, she is human too and her daughter has to have tubes put in that day. If she doesn’t take this appointment it could be two more weeks to get her in. I completely understand. My other assistant has plans for the day as well, and Mondays are her day off and we have an agreement where she gets no school days off. It was hard, and I debated but I finally decided I would keep my plans with my children and nieces and use my FIRST personal day of the school year. (I go by school years. Not calendar years). Almost a weeks notice. I sent that message out 12 hours ago and only one response. (I should mention today was a snow day, so only two families were here) so now I’m stressed that my families are angry with me, talking behind my back. Thank goodness for my talk with my assistant who convinced me to take the day and told me I deserve it.

This current group of families, is just not my favorite. They are not personable. I only have one family that makes me feel appreciated and thanks me for all the work I do with their child. I know there is no solution other than to vent, but honestly I think the way the parents behave is causing me to burn out more than the actual working with children. I want to be seen as a person rather than just a service. I thought that’s why people chose home childcare, because it is more personable.

I am so sorry you are dealing with unappreciative parents. My New Years resolution was to not feel guilt for taking time off, for appts, for my children, for a mental health day. Whatever I needed a day off for I deserved to have off.

I would also having a hard time biting my tongue or even allowing the DCF’s that we’re talking about me behind my back. How incredibly rude and childish to do to anyone, let alone someone who takes care of their kids day in and day out. And I would probably term immediately and let them know exactly why.

Go enjoy your day off with you kids and niece and not think about those families at all.

[Jupadia]

I run an in home childcare in my basement, completely separate from my living area. A have an assistant and a back up substitute. It is my number one goal to be reliable. I’ve worked through a lot of things that I know some of these parents have called out for at their own job. In fact, I can count on one hand how many times I’ve closed unexpectedly, with little to no notice. I make it work. Even if I’m home sick or my children are home sick, we get no peace with the littles downstairs. But we make it work.

But heaven forbid I need to close, all I hear is “what am I supposed to do?” Which to me just seems so unappreciative and just rude. One of the first things I tell these parents is this is a home daycare, always be prepared with a back up plan. Obviously, my assistant and sub are unavailable, I have no idea what you should do. Sometimes it takes all I have to bite my tongue. And I end up apologizing!!! I shouldn’t have to apologize.

I apologized to an angry parent when I took a day off after my first miscarriage. I opened the daycare and came back to close on the day of my grandmothers funeral. I sang songs and played with their kids when my marriage was on the brink of divorce. I’ve worked through major headaches, and when parents come in I put on a happy face and smile like nothing is wrong. When my first grand baby was being born, I usually open at 7 but my assistant or sub couldn’t come in until 8. I had parents griping about that. Two weeks ago I came down with strep. I worked it out with my subs that daycare can be open as usual. In fact I could have used a personal day and got paid, but instead I paid for a sub to be there the full day. Now the night before I took my car to be dropped off at the shop for repairs. So my car wasn’t home. Do you know how grateful these parents were. Firstly only one family asked how I was feeling and told me to feel better. Another accidentally sent me a text ABOUT me, and how she and another parent were talking and my car was not even home. Not sure who that message was meant for, but apparently these parents have conversations about me. I hope she felt terrible when I replied. Now, I have plans to take next Monday off while my child is out of school. Already made plans with her and my nieces. My sub was set to cover me for the day. Well, she is human too and her daughter has to have tubes put in that day. If she doesn’t take this appointment it could be two more weeks to get her in. I completely understand. My other assistant has plans for the day as well, and Mondays are her day off and we have an agreement where she gets no school days off. It was hard, and I debated but I finally decided I would keep my plans with my children and nieces and use my FIRST personal day of the school year. (I go by school years. Not calendar years). Almost a weeks notice. I sent that message out 12 hours ago and only one response. (I should mention today was a snow day, so only two families were here) so now I’m stressed that my families are angry with me, talking behind my back. Thank goodness for my talk with my assistant who convinced me to take the day and told me I deserve it.

This current group of families, is just not my favorite. They are not personable. I only have one family that makes me feel appreciated and thanks me for all the work I do with their child. I know there is no solution other than to vent, but honestly I think the way the parents behave is causing me to burn out more than the actual working with children. I want to be seen as a person rather than just a service. I thought that’s why people chose home childcare, because it is more personable.

Stop worrying about if their mad, it's not your problem. If someone says something you dont need to give them a full explanation of why your taking time off and dont have backup that day. For the most part I have backup when I do need a day, last year April my backup was unable to come in, but my mouth was swelling and I had to go to the detist so i closed for the day and just said do to emergency circumstances I'm closed tomorrow. Parents had about 12 hours notice . I dont say why backups not available, just that it's not and I'm closed.

As for the family that yelled at you for taking time off after a miscarriage, they would be out my door and never comming back. I had to close for my seconed one last summer for a day (friday so had a long weekend to recover) for a DC operation. I even had to tell one family there last day was a no go. If even one parent had said something about it incovinacing them I dont know what I would have done.

As long as you are following your own policies I would not worry.

[Ariana]

Lil_Diddle no matter what you do SOMEONE will gripe about it! There is a really good quote that says “what I think of me is my business, what you think of me is yours”. It really is not about you so you do what you want to do and ignore them. Bending over backwards for others has always blown back in my face so I don’t do it anymore! Take the day off with zero apologies. They will come to respect you more, trust me.

[Unregistered]

Have a DCM who is due in May, 2 weeks ago she said to plan on having her school ager here next school year as well. Well today 7 year old says he is starting after school care and wont be coming anymore. So I text mom and said i hear B is leaving us! Sad day! And she proceeded to tell me still wants to have baby in my care come Sept. But now she just left me with 2 open spots for summer care. I was fine having one open spot/attempting to find temporary care.. but not thrilled about having to fill 2 spots... I told her she would need to pay a holding fee to keep spot open for new baby come june when spot is open and available..so she said she is going to find new DC options.. what would you have done !?

[Cat Herder]

Have a DCM who is due in May, 2 weeks ago she said to plan on having her school ager here next school year as well. Well today 7 year old says he is starting after school care and wont be coming anymore. So I text mom and said i hear B is leaving us! Sad day! And she proceeded to tell me still wants to have baby in my care come Sept. But now she just left me with 2 open spots for summer care. I was fine having one open spot/attempting to find temporary care.. but not thrilled about having to fill 2 spots... I told her she would need to pay a holding fee to keep spot open for new baby come june when spot is open and available..so she said she is going to find new DC options.. what would you have done !?

I would have charged her full tuition for both slots the very day they became available, even if one at a time. :hug: Never hold slots for free. Always fill them first come, first served.

Every day you hold a slot is income being taken from your family. :hug:

[Unregistered]

I would have charged her full tuition for both slots the very day they became available, even if one at a time. :hug: Never hold slots for free. Always fill them first come, first served.

Every day you hold a slot is income being taken from your family. :hug:

The infant slot is not available until june, but she was paying for her son's. You make me feel like I made the right choice! I seem to be the mean provider in the area. One who actually charges their late pick up fee and wont hold spots for free..

[Cat Herder]

The infant slot is not available until june, but she was paying for her son's. You make me feel like I made the right choice! I seem to be the mean provider in the area. One who actually charges their late pick up fee and wont hold spots for free..

You did. We can't keep taking from our own families with the hope that clients will appreciate it. They won't. They will always end up doing what works best for their families. We should do no different. No need to end up broke and burnt out.