Venting Thread

[Cat Herder]

"Can't you, like, invite some neighbor kids over or something? >Snowflake< does not like being the only one here this week, >snowflake< needs to play with other kids and cried the whole way here."

Yup, I'll get right on that.

* before anyone asks, yes, all current families have at least one parent home this week and, yes, snowflake has been loving unlimited free art, the kinetic sand "ocean life theme" science table and "veterinary medical charting" writing center all week. Gleefully alone.

First world school holiday troubles.

[daycarediva]

"Can't you, like, invite some neighbor kids over or something? >Snowflake< does not like being the only one here this week, >snowflake< needs to play with other kids and cried the whole way here."

Yup, I'll get right on that.

* before anyone asks, yes, all current families have at least one parent home this week and, yes, snowflake has been loving unlimited free art, the kinetic sand "ocean life theme" science table and "veterinary medical charting" writing center all week. Gleefully alone.

First world school holiday troubles.

Well then, I see that >snowflake< would much rather be home with >parent not working< because all of her other friends are getting that time, too.

I've had parents say that their child LOVED the 1:1 time when the only child here, but never the opposite.

[DaycareDays126]

That line of thinking is THE foundation to my sanity and my success.

I have VERY clear divides as to what I view as a parent responsibility and what I view as a provider responsibility and my parents are "well educated" in that regard and if not, I have zero issues explaining it to them.

The need to "get their money's worth" is met here abruptly and swiftly with a tilt of my head and a scrunched up confused look on my face and the words "your child does not have a monetary value" type lecture....

My backbone is getting much stronger but there is always something they will surprise me with. I wish I was confident enough in myself to be able to handle these situations when they arise in a consistent and "putting my foot down" sort of way every single time.

"Can I bring my sick child even though both parents have been home for 2 weeks? I have things to do today."

"I'm going to need you to take care of my child 5 days a week/10 hours a day. During that time, can you teach them this, this, and this? Oh and I need you to do this with them too. I'll drop them off the second they wake up and I'll pick them up 1 hour before their ridiculously early bed time whether I have to work that day or not."

"Oh you're taking those days off? And I have to pay you? I have to get my nails done that day, what am I supposed to do about that?"

What do they think is actually their job besides getting them up in the morning and picking them up at night? I think my job is to supervise their children in a happy, fun, and loving environment during the times the parents are unable to do that themselves (i.e. Work, etc. I won't get into the "parents not at work debate"). I strive to have an environment that prepares children for preschool/kindergarten but I am not a preschool teacher and have never claimed to be one. I will assist in teaching your child how to be independent but I don't believe it is solely my job to teach them all of their abc's and 1,2,3's, how to tie their shoes, change their clothes, use their manners, use the toilet, do their homework, and everything else in between while their child is sick, teething, tired from getting no sleep the night before or getting up too early in the morning for the $3 an hour they somehow imagine in their head as $20 an hour while they critique that Little Johnny is 2 and should be using the toilet but they don't have the time to train him, why am I not doing it? Or Little Susie still doesn't know how to write her name so I'm going to need you to spend extra time with her on that because when we get home we have 25 errands to run before getting home and going to bed.

I could go on and on as I'm sure we all could!

[Cat Herder]

Well then, I see that >snowflake< would much rather be home with >parent not working< because all of her other friends are getting that time, too.

I've had parents say that their child LOVED the 1:1 time when the only child here, but never the opposite.

Nail on the head, mostly. I think it is more >parent< feels bad that >snowflake< has to go to daycare this week, alone. Fear of judgement from other mommies.

IMHO, >snowflake< is better here this week so >other parent< can spend much needed active time (read mountain climbing, hiking, skiing) with much older siblings who rarely get this opportunity and will launch from the nest before >snowflake< even gets to elementary school. Benefits the whole family from my viewpoint.

Still, makes for one defensive parent before morning coffee...

[daycarediva]

Nail on the head, mostly. I think it is more >parent< feels bad that >snowflake< has to go to daycare this week, alone. Fear of judgement from other mommies.

IMHO, >snowflake< is better here this week so >other parent< can spend much needed active time (read mountain climbing, hiking, skiing) with much older siblings who rarely get this opportunity and will launch from the nest before >snowflake< even gets to elementary school. Benefits the whole family from my viewpoint.

Still, makes for one defensive parent before morning coffee...

Ahhh, I see. That's an entirely different situation than what I have currently. I wouldn't feel AS guilty if I were her.

[lovemydaycare0912]

I had been telling all parents since October to make sure all littles got their flu shot and proof to me by Dec 31st or they could not return to care u til it was done. State regs mandate this. All my parents did it early except 1. I kept writing it on every daily report. All last week she was off from work, still brought dcb, and I reminded her everyday. I told her try a walk in as she may not even have to schedule an appointment with his doctor.

Dcm waits literally until Friday. Messages me this morning that they don't do under age 4 so he has an appointment scheduled today. Like come on lady! That is your fault not mine. Smh

[Play Care]

This may be controversial and I'll apologize in advance...

A Facebook friend of mine "home schools" But it's clear from what she posts and how the kids are that their are NOT being educated. And the kicker? She even admits that she struggles with it, but gets defensive when others try to give advice.

I feel bad, because education isn't something to do in a half a$$ed manner.

[daycarediva]

We homeshooled dd (medical necessity, dialysis three times a week)

She had a daily morning meeting (granted, it was at breakfast) folders for work, expectations, a set curriculum and goals. She entered school ahead of peers.

'unschooling' is something I can't wrap my brain around.

[finsup]

This may be controversial and I'll apologize in advance...

A Facebook friend of mine "home schools" But it's clear from what she posts and how the kids are that their are NOT being educated. And the kicker? She even admits that she struggles with it, but gets defensive when others try to give advice.

I feel bad, because education isn't something to do in a half a$$ed manner.

As a a homeschooler, it doesn't offend/upset etc me, it frusterates me! I know someone who is like that and actually tried to get them to consider public school. You have to be committed to homeschooling, and if you can't, you need to explore other options. It's not easy, struggles do come as (as they would in public school too) but if you aren't willing to do something about them its by no means going to get easier!

[laundrymom]

First day after holidays and one baby won't drink or nap. One boy is being so ugly to friends he's now playing w soft toys and one who has been doing this hummmmm groan thing and pointing g at my TV in another room for two hours. He's never in almost two years even seen my TV ON!!

[Play Care]

This may be controversial and I'll apologize in advance...

A Facebook friend of mine "home schools" But it's clear from what she posts and how the kids are that their are NOT being educated. And the kicker? She even admits that she struggles with it, but gets defensive when others try to give advice.

I feel bad, because education isn't something to do in a half a$$ed manner.

Arrrh!! I know I wrote THEY ARE not THEIR!!

Moving on...::

[Pestle]

As a a homeschooler, it doesn't offend/upset etc me, it frusterates me! I know someone who is like that and actually tried to get them to consider public school. You have to be committed to homeschooling, and if you can't, you need to explore other options. It's not easy, struggles do come as (as they would in public school too) but if you aren't willing to do something about them its by no means going to get easier!

Yes, I'm prepping to home school, because I know that with my level of education, my current experience with early learning, the self-discipline and organizational skills I learned from previous jobs, the example I got from the person who home schooled me, the financial and digital and local resources available, a huge amount of effort, some trial and error, and more patience than Job, I can do a better job than the public schools.

Don't have most of the items on that list? The kids might be better off in the system. My SIL is "home schooling" and I really hope that somebody in her town reports her if it's as bad as I suspect it is.

[Play Care]

We homeshooled dd (medical necessity, dialysis three times a week)

She had a daily morning meeting (granted, it was at breakfast) folders for work, expectations, a set curriculum and goals. She entered school ahead of peers.

'unschooling' is something I can't wrap my brain around.

I have friends who very successfully homeschool. But, as you know, it's WORK to do it, a tremendous amount! And I think that unless the parents have some background in education, they truly are clueless to the amount of work that excellent homeschooling requires.
I also think people throw out homeschooling as a cure all when kids are struggling in public/private school, the same way people throw out "just babysit!" when a mom struggles with going back to work. As if it's "easy" and there's "nothing to it"

[Pestle]

I have friends who very successfully homeschool. But, as you know, it's WORK to do it, a tremendous amount! And I think that unless the parents have some background in education, they truly are clueless to the amount of work that excellent homeschooling requires.
I also think people throw out homeschooling as a cure all when kids are struggling in public/private school, the same way people throw out "just babysit!" when a mom struggles with going back to work. As if it's "easy" and there's "nothing to it"

Agreed. I've seen, however, a lot of parents with profoundly disabled kids who finally ended up taking over the education themselves when the public schools failed to provide teachers and programs appropriate for the kids. My cousins ended up moving across the country to get into a public school system that targeted kids with a particular set of disabilities. If cross-country relocation isn't an option, some parents have to take up the mantle of teacher.

[Claraskids]

Agreed. I've seen, however, a lot of parents with profoundly disabled kids who finally ended up taking over the education themselves when the public schools failed to provide teachers and programs appropriate for the kids. My cousins ended up moving across the country to get into a public school system that targeted kids with a particular set of disabilities. If cross-country relocation isn't an option, some parents have to take up the mantle of teacher.

As a former public school teacher, private school teacher, and homeschooler; I've seen and experienced both the best and the worst that is out there. That is what gets me so frustrated when a parent claims that there choice of education is the only way. I truly believe that you have to make the best choice for your OWN child and no one else.
When we started homeschooling, it was because our second child had special needs that the public school couldn't meet. It was the perfect fit for him. But we also said that the decision to homeschool would be made one year at a time. Currently, my oldest is a senior at the public school and thriving. She has been accepted to numerous colleges and given academic scholarships. Our second child asked to try online school this year and is loving it. It is also much easier with the daycare load. We started out the year homeschooling our youngest but it quickly fell apart. After much deliberation, he transferred to the public school in November. There's been a few bumps and learning curves, but so far so good.
Bottom line, each child learns different and this mom at least had to be aware of that.