Venting Thread

[daycarediva]

I have one who is 4.5 who can't manage slip ons, can't eat without getting food all over his face (cheeks, chin, often FOREHEAD). He can't fill his own cup at the refrigerator, can't wash his hands without instruction (and I repeat instructions every time). He's an awesome little boy, it's just that the elevator isn't going all the way to the top in some area of his brain. He's "smart"-he can tell you all about dinosaurs, he's good with letters (can't recognize some numbers, though). He tries to cover what he doesn't know by guessing. This drives me nuts-I don't know if he's trying to cover up ignorance, trying to avoid getting in trouble, or trying to learn. I wish his mom would have him evaluated, but 2 years ago, a head start "teacher" said he was smart, so that's good enough for her.

Sounds like my 3yo dcb. He speaks so well, he must not be delayed in any other area, right?

[Leigh]

I would just be happy with shoes they could manage themselves. My 3yo's cannot manage SLIP ON SHOES, let alone tie.

I have one who is 4.5 who can't manage slip ons, can't eat without getting food all over his face (cheeks, chin, often FOREHEAD). He can't fill his own cup at the refrigerator, can't wash his hands without instruction (and I repeat instructions every time). He's an awesome little boy, it's just that the elevator isn't going all the way to the top in some area of his brain. He's "smart"-he can tell you all about dinosaurs, he's good with letters (can't recognize some numbers, though). He tries to cover what he doesn't know by guessing. This drives me nuts-I don't know if he's trying to cover up ignorance, trying to avoid getting in trouble, or trying to learn. I wish his mom would have him evaluated, but 2 years ago, a head start "teacher" said he was smart, so that's good enough for her.

[daycarediva]

I would just be happy with shoes they could manage themselves. My 3yo's cannot manage SLIP ON SHOES, let alone tie.

[Blackcat31]

Thanks! I didn't think to break it into steps for some reason. I've been doing it all at once and obviously her mind does not work that way. I'll keep trying. We also do it multiple times a day but I feel like we're always in a hurry. I need to sloooow down. This is my biggest struggle.

I have learned to be a bit proactive with some of the hurried parts of the day. If I know we are going to be going outside after center play, I'll have the kids that need some extra time pick up and head out to the cubby/coat room first while the rest of the kids are finishing their clean up and bathroom time.
This allows the kids that need that little bit of extra time (it CAN be incredibly hard to watch a child struggle with something you can so easily do in .5 nano-seconds...)

It just works well to give them a "head start" so I dont feel like I am rushing them or that I am making them feel I am impatient... especially when I kind of feel like, other than personal responsibility, being in a hurry is one of the biggest issues our current society struggles with.

Breaking it down into steps also gives the child small chances to feel successful and confident verses having to wait for the entire process to be completed before hearing "Yay! You did it!" kwim?

[Indoorvoice]

Nope, no tricks or easy buttons. I just break it down into steps and we work on each step until it is mastered.

I have them do LOTS of observing and then I provide lots of encouragement to try a single step themselves.

I have one DCK (age 3) working on tying the two laces together....
"J, you tie them together and I'll help with the next step".

I demonstrate the next step (while he is mastering the first...)

Then when I think he's ready to move on to the next step, I add in the next part.

"J you do the first two steps like you've been working on and I'll help you with the next"

Etc etc....

I usually have the whole group sitting when we are preparing to go outside and each child is usually working on whatever step they are currently on....I move along back and forth between all the kids and assist and encourage where necessary.

I wish I did have a magic trick or easy answer but honestly it's just something that is embedded into our day. It's also something we do multiple times a day so with most my kids being FT, 5 days a week/2-3X's a day is a lot of practice.

Broken down in steps, each kid no matter where they are developmentally, can master a step at a time on their own pace.

I haven't had a single child leave my care for school not knowing how to tie their shoes.

Thanks! I didn't think to break it into steps for some reason. I've been doing it all at once and obviously her mind does not work that way. I'll keep trying. We also do it multiple times a day but I feel like we're always in a hurry. I need to sloooow down. This is my biggest struggle.

[Blackcat31]

Do you have a magic way to teach them? I have been working on it for weeks with my 3.5 year old but I can't figure out how to simplify more than I am. And sometimes we are in a hurry so I have to just do it. I'm getting frustrated!

Nope, no tricks or easy buttons. I just break it down into steps and we work on each step until it is mastered.

I have them do LOTS of observing and then I provide lots of encouragement to try a single step themselves.

I have one DCK (age 3) working on tying the two laces together....
"J, you tie them together and I'll help with the next step".

I demonstrate the next step (while he is mastering the first...)

Then when I think he's ready to move on to the next step, I add in the next part.

"J you do the first two steps like you've been working on and I'll help you with the next"

Etc etc....

I usually have the whole group sitting when we are preparing to go outside and each child is usually working on whatever step they are currently on....I move along back and forth between all the kids and assist and encourage where necessary.

I wish I did have a magic trick or easy answer but honestly it's just something that is embedded into our day. It's also something we do multiple times a day so with most my kids being FT, 5 days a week/2-3X's a day is a lot of practice.

Broken down in steps, each kid no matter where they are developmentally, can master a step at a time on their own pace.

I haven't had a single child leave my care for school not knowing how to tie their shoes.

[finsup]

! My vent is the exact opposite....

DCD keeps sending DCB in Vel-cro shoes.....how does that help when we are in the middle of learning how to tie our shoes??!!?? :confused:

Easy (for me) is not my goal..... independence and self-help skills (for the kids) are the end game for me.

I definitely agree, but this kiddo is so not at a point where he can even attempt tying yet. Developmentally he's just not there. I just want him in gear he can do himself, and without tantrums if i won't do it for him. Dcm/dcd do EVERYTHING for him and it's really created a monster now that he's older

[Indoorvoice]

! My vent is the exact opposite....

DCD keeps sending DCB in Vel-cro shoes.....how does that help when we are in the middle of learning how to tie our shoes??!!?? :confused:

Easy (for me) is not my goal..... independence and self-help skills (for the kids) are the end game for me.

Do you have a magic way to teach them? I have been working on it for weeks with my 3.5 year old but I can't figure out how to simplify more than I am. And sometimes we are in a hurry so I have to just do it. I'm getting frustrated!

[Blackcat31]

Dcd drops off this morning and says they had to turn around and get a different pair of shoes because dcd just had to have them thanks dcd, that's super helpful when I'm trying very hard to teach your 3.5yr old throwing a fit gets you nothing grrr. So the shoes are ones with laces...can dcb tie? No. They tied pretty tight knots so he could just slip them on but it takes him 15 minutes to do it. Plus results in a screaming fit of "you do it"...no such luck kiddo. That doesn't work here. My attitude is "if you can, you do." I've got much younger kids who I HAVE to do things for because they're babies. You my friend, are 3.5 and have been putting your own gear on since you were 2.5 (at my house, at home, yeah he still doesn't...) Those shoes did make it challenging but not impossible. Sending a note home tonight to send him in his regular, velcro sneakers. Daycare is not a fashion show. Kids need sensible clothing and shoes that they can manage independently.

! My vent is the exact opposite....

DCD keeps sending DCB in Vel-cro shoes.....how does that help when we are in the middle of learning how to tie our shoes??!!?? :confused:

Easy (for me) is not my goal..... independence and self-help skills (for the kids) are the end game for me.

[finsup]

Dcd drops off this morning and says they had to turn around and get a different pair of shoes because dcd just had to have them thanks dcd, that's super helpful when I'm trying very hard to teach your 3.5yr old throwing a fit gets you nothing grrr. So the shoes are ones with laces...can dcb tie? No. They tied pretty tight knots so he could just slip them on but it takes him 15 minutes to do it. Plus results in a screaming fit of "you do it"...no such luck kiddo. That doesn't work here. My attitude is "if you can, you do." I've got much younger kids who I HAVE to do things for because they're babies. You my friend, are 3.5 and have been putting your own gear on since you were 2.5 (at my house, at home, yeah he still doesn't...) Those shoes did make it challenging but not impossible. Sending a note home tonight to send him in his regular, velcro sneakers. Daycare is not a fashion show. Kids need sensible clothing and shoes that they can manage independently.

[MsLisa]

The amount of times I've created and recreated logos, advertisements, web page ideas, researched branding and all that crap, just to get someone, ANYONE for heck sake....you would think I would just give the f**k up already.
I'm so ungodly impatient, finicky, and pissy. But borderline insanity-driven determined at the same time....:confused:

[lovemydaycare0912]

Feeling mean after sticking to your policies but not really. If parents could just understand communication is key. Without it, yes I have no problem charging you late fees.

Cornhuskers Lotion. Old-time stuff but it works for me. My father grew up on a farm and he recommended it for me when my hands were always dry and cracked when I started child care.

[MunchkinWrangler]

First I apologize if this is the wrong place to post! I haven't been on this site for a while.

I have been providing childcare for the last 15 years. The last couple of years I started getting Eczema on my hands. I am constantly doing dishes, and hand washing and am now trying to concur this problem. My hands especially my right hand all around the knuckles and fingers are red and itchy and it looks AWFUL! I am starting to have some of my families ask if I'm ok!

Any advice on how to get rid of or control this Eczema? Over the counter Cortisone isn't helping. I have tried Essential oils not working. The only thing that helps is to keep my hands out of water! But due to the nature of our business that is impossible!!

Winter is the worst for me but I don't have eczema. The constant soap and water strips your skin of it's natural moisturizers causing them to be extremely dry. I have honestly put just plain Vaseline or Aquaphor overnight and it helps, as well as using a heavier creamy lotion after handwashing(which licensing recommends because cracks in your skin can open you up to infection).

[Baby Beluga]

Oh I had planned vacation time, just had to literally terminate care unexpectedly for two toddlers 3 months before they were to age out so my funds are like gone 3 months before the new babies are to start (already have deposits on the spaces). I have bills to pay before I can take a vacation because my only income is from childcare (young widowed single, no hubby)
Can't take time off if no income is coming in... I can only take 4 babies at a time... 2 spaces empty is not good because of how it went down, but my reputation means more than $$

:hug: I'm so sorry. I agree with BC above, sometimes the business side of this business ****s.