Logged Out For Privacy, Will I Be In Trouble?

[Kaddidle Care]

I think that I might be in trouble.
So yesterday was my daughter back to school night. I have missed back to school night for the last 5 years because of DC. Well this BSN, my daughter was asked to sing solo the National Anthem. The music class did a theme on different countries of the world, my daughter had a solo presentation of singing in French, Arabic and Gaelic. I was not going to miss it this year for anything.
So as normal, I informed the parents a month in advance. I sent out reminders weekly and posted it everywhere all over my house. I even sent a text the morning of the event that I would be closing early so I could attend this event. NOT one parent seemed to mind, no one said anything at all.
So yesterday I am getting ready to leave and I still have one families kids here. I called the parents 5 min before I was to leave to remind them again. I got no answer. I called both parents. Well I waited a total of 15 minutes and no one came. I was not going to go down the list of emergency contacts so as stated in my PHB/policies if you are not here to pick up your children on time and I have some where to be, I will take the kids with me. Well, I loaded up the kids in the car and off I went. I kept my phone on me and checked it often. Finally about 30 min. into the singing concert, my phone rings and it’s the DCM.. Boy is she mad.
Long story short, I end up having to leave the concert to take the kids to meet the mom out front of the school. I missed my daughters performance and the mom was so mad that she said that she will be turning me in?? UGH My emotions are all over the place and I am not too sure what I should do? BTW the kids are not here today and I have not called DCP to ask anything……
What should I do right now and why do I feel like I am at fault?
BTW even if the DC family forgives me, they are not welcome back here. They cost me something that I can never replace. Oh and my daughter was really upset when she told me she noticed that I had to get up and walk out in the middle of the concert and did not get to see her perform….She said “those kids robbed you of seeing me at my best again mom” I cried most of the night last night….

Based on that last line I'm gathering that this is not the first time these parents have let you down. It was time to end it.

I feel so bad for you and your daughter when it's evident that you are a very caring Mother.

If I'm putting 2&2 together properly, this is the mother that thinks nothing of missing her own daughters events. Her own isn't a priority with her so yours means even less.

I hope you get an excellent replacement.

[mrsp'slilpeeps]

It could of been worse, you could have left them sitting on your doorstep, waiting for mom. (JK).
You having to take someone else's kids with you to a family function, is beyond your job and I hope you see what a good provider you are.
I would have called CPS to come get them.
Do not take this family back.

[Unregistered]

Just my opinion...

It sounded to me that the mom's apology was heart-felt, and I think I would have leaned more toward giving her the benefit of the doubt and accepted her apology and continued to work with her. Especially since prior to this she was a "good" parent. And since other ways to enjoy the daughter's performance had become available. Not criticizing OP who had to feel all the tension and emotions involved, and I know feeling that is hard - just saying that I'm the sort who tries to forgive parent lapses and to keep working with them. Which is easy for me to say, since I haven't run into anything like this myself - my parents continue to be great. It seems to me that "term them" is the advice most often given on here and I'm wondering if sometimes there might be other options offered that might be more helpful.

I think that the OP did the right thing by not continuing to provide care for this family. It's not that the apology wasn't heartfelt, because it very well could have been. The point is that an apology doesn't automatically make things right. Apologies are band-aids, not cures.

The OP's daughter expressed how she felt about having her mom have to miss another thing because of the daycare kids and that would have been enough to term right there! Factor in the daycare parent having prior knowledge of what time that she needed to pick up her kid by and that she still wouldn't pick up on time. It doesn't matter if she was never late before and promised never to be late again, what matters is that the one time that it really & truly mattered to the OP and her family that all dcks be picked up on time, this parent ignored it. Then add in the extremely inappropriate behavior from the parent even though she knew that she was at fault. Yes, she apologized for it, but the damage was already done. "I'm sorry" doesn't erase any of it. Watching her daughter's solo on video instead of seeing it first hand is not the same. It's better than not seeing it at all, but it is nowhere near the same. The dcmom's reaction was so completely uncalled for that it went past being irrational and straight into being just downright crazy! That would be enough to result in a termination because I would constantly be in fear of that type of reaction any time that the mom didn't get her way. Who wants to deal with that? I think that sometimes parents will apologize for things like that and if the provider accepts the apology and lets the parent keep their kids enrolled, then it becomes easier for the parent to break policies or have irrational outbursts and think that since the apology worked the first time, it'll work again. I'm not saying that it's like that all of the time, but it does happen.

I think that while it's good that she apologized, there was way too much damage done to let the dcmom keep her kid there.

[Doodlebug]

I feel so bad for you. First you are worried you are going to miss out on something for your kids, then the parent immediately says they are going to report you... another whole form of worry. Why do parents always do that?

I know the mom appologized, but the hurtful works and lack of respect for you and your family in the first place tells you the character of this woman. I would have done the same thing.

Parents forget that you have a family and your kids are important to you too.

Good Luck to you!