How Much Violence Is Normal?

[LtTawnyMadison]

So... the plot thickens. As of this past Monday, the boy who was repeatedly violent at her old school is now at her new school! Her old school expelled the boy after she left (not sure if it was a direct result of her leaving, or if more incidents happened). He's in a different class, though, as he is younger. I guess they have the age groups split up differently at the new school. My husband is still going to speak with the new school's director about it, though. Too bad kids don't come with references, huh?? If we need to, we can transfer our daughter to this school's other branch, which isn't any further distance away. I doubt it will be an issue though, since he's in a different class, and since part of the reason we transferred her to this school is because we believe they are duly viligant about issues like this. It's just super-ironic!

[Blackcat31]

So... the plot thickens. As of this past Monday, the boy who was repeatedly violent at her old school is now at her new school! Her old school expelled the boy after she left (not sure if it was a direct result of her leaving, or if more incidents happened). He's in a different class, though, as he is younger. I guess they have the age groups split up differently at the new school. My husband is still going to speak with the new school's director about it, though. Too bad kids don't come with references, huh?? If we need to, we can transfer our daughter to this school's other branch, which isn't any further distance away. I doubt it will be an issue though, since he's in a different class, and since part of the reason we transferred her to this school is because we believe they are duly viligant about issues like this. It's just super-ironic!

Wow! What a crazy situation! I can't believe he ended up in the same center with your DD again!

I do think you are correct to be cautious and I would continue to make sure your DD stays in an opposite class from this boy but I would caution you on telling the current Director anything about this boy's history at the old center.

As a provider, I don't like to hear things about other families from other parents as I think that is somewhat crossing some confidentiality boundaries. I mean you can share YOUR perspective and what happened to you but I would tread carefully about giving out information about this other child since technically the Director shouldn't be discussing other children/families with you at all either....kwim?

I also want to mention that just because he was a bully or had trouble in the other center doesn't always mean he will be or is the same at this new center. The environment has ALOT to do with children and how they behave.

Personally, if I were you I would just make sure you DD stays in another classroom away from this boy and let the rest be.

[LtTawnyMadison]

That sounds like good advice. Our daughter doesn't seem concerned about it. How do we make sure they stay in separate classrooms without talking with staff about it?

[Blackcat31]

That sounds like good advice. Our daughter doesn't seem concerned about it. How do we make sure they stay in separate classrooms without talking with staff about it?

Oh, I would still talk to the staff and let them know that you want to make sure that your DD is not placed in the same room (ever) with the other child.

You can let them know that your DD had issues with him due to aggression/bullying but I would just steer clear of anything that isn't directly related to your DD's experiences. I wouldn't tell them any other information I had.

I know it is a thin line but just try to keep the info to ONLY things related to your DD. If it is anything else, it just looks like gossip.