Feeling Discriminated Against! I Need Help :(

[Blackcat31]

Lynna~ Is your child care center part of a food program? If they are, then if you get a Special Diet Statement from your Dr stating how your son cannot have certain foods, then the center is suppose to comply with a child's special diet. I would look into that. You would have filled out a form when you enrolled your son.

As far as the other things you have going on, please call your licensing department and report this stuff. You do not have to give your name as it can be done anonymously. The licensing department is required by law to look into any and all complaints.

Are there any other children in the center who are allowed to use cloth diapers? That is probably one of the weirdest rules I have heard. (Sounds like your boss is trying to be difficult more than anything.)

As far as the other issues you have going on, please continue searching for another job. No one should ever have to go through what you are going through and have no one believe you. Wishing there were cameras in your center.

My heart breaks thinking of you and the fact that you are reaching out and looking for help but not really knowing what to do or where to turn. Please keep in touch on the forum and if anything we can offer you support and encouragment while you muddle through this difficult time in your life.

This is a good place to vent and share and perhaps something will change soon for you, in the meantime, keep us posted and hopefully someone will have an idea or a solution for you.

[youretooloud]

I use cloth in my daycare, and I think the whole "they are unsanitary" is the stupidest thing i've ever heard.

I agree with you, and I would look for another job if you can. Hang in there til you find something else.

[Crystal]

I am sorry that this might sound mean, but I gotta say it. WHAT is wrong with you? IMO YOU are being a neglectful parent by not ensuring that your child is not being taken care of properly. It is YOUR job to protect him and YOU are failing to do so. YOU need to call licensing and report this. ALL of this. YOU are a mandated reporter, and if they are doing this with your child, I can imagine they are with others as well. YOU need to call and put a stop to it.

As for the harrassment, you need to call the labor board and report it. They will step in and ensure that a stop is put to it.

No amount of money in the world would stop me from reporting this and taking a chance at losing my job. Public assistance is available to you and I'd look into it now.

[daycare]

I am sorry that this might sound mean, but I gotta say it. WHAT is wrong with you? IMO YOU are being a neglectful parent by not ensuring that your child is not being taken care of properly. It is YOUR job to protect him and YOU are failing to do so. YOU need to call licensing and report this. ALL of this. YOU are a mandated reporter, and if they are doing this with your child, I can imagine they are with others as well. YOU need to call and put a stop to it.

As for the harrassment, you need to call the labor board and report it. They will step in and ensure that a stop is put to it.

No amount of money in the world would stop me from reporting this and taking a chance at losing my job. Public assistance is available to you and I'd look into it now.

like like like! exactly what I was saying!!

[mismatchedsocks]

Ok I have read this the past day in shock about what you explain is happening. First off none of it is ok. Everything everyone else is doing is wrong. The touching, the boss, the co workers, the soy feeding, the neglect, the excuses. BUT I have to say what you are doing is the worst in my opinion. Now I am not cold hearted and I was a single mom for a long time when my son was born, so I know how hard it is. BUT his safety is in jeopardy! I am sure you can get state assistance for childcare to get him somewhere safe, even if you have to work there. I would look into that first, BUT that is just me putting my child first, which is what you NEED to do instead of making up excuses why you cant, focus on why you should RIGHT NOW.

Also if you are caring for your brother because your parents cannot, then you should be compensated and not have to pay for him.......

[Unregistered]

Ooh. Harsh.

Okay. So I read all of this--this woman's original posts and then everyone's reply. Some, okay, cool, great. Others? Y'all ****. Did you ever think she's scared? Did you ever think that in previous centers she's worked at, and yes she did say she had prior experience, that she had never encountered this sort of treatment of a child? Maybe she's reeling from it being her own baby getting this treatment? And yeah, she put a semi list of expenses and she's made the excuse that she can't afford to lose her job. You condemn her for that. I think that's kinda smart actually. She can go get help from the state, yeah, but from the time she fills out that application it can take anywhere from a month to three to get any sort of good help. And if there's the chance of her getting her, her baby, and her younger sibling evicted before she gets that help? What if next month she posts on here, saying she quit her job, she filed complaints, she went to the labor board. And then tells you all, they got evicted, they're living in a family shelter, she still hasn't found a job, she sold her car just to have food. Because she followed advice urging her to just up and quit, and maybe screw herself over? No. And you don't know if they're treating other children the same way as hers. They obviously don't seem to like her, specifically.

So it may just be they are taking it out on her child to get at her, to get her to quit. Lynna, don't quit. If you quit, it's your word against theirs. If you quit, you can't draw unemployment. Then, you'll really be up a creek without a paddle. If it was my family, my son, I would ask to have my position changed and be placed in his classroom. Call the labor board and report it anonymously. Report it to DHS, cool, do it anonymously and claim--truthfully, even!!--you're a parent and you've seen treatment of children that has you very concerned. Don't let anyone on here tell you you're a bad mother because you are searching for answers, for advice, before you make a choice. I understand almost immediately where you're coming from and actually, if you're really in Tennessee, if you're in Nashville, maybe? I might actually know you. I have a friend who lives just a door away from my house and he and his wife used to always have this cheery little lady come visit them. Her name was Lynna. She's got a one year old baby boy and a fuzzy black headed little brother. If that's you, girl, don't even listen to them telling you you're being stupid. I'll be in touch, later on, right now, I got to go pick up my grandbaby. You take care of you and yours, and stay strong.

[Crystal]

I understand what you are saying, but ultimitley she is putting her childin harms way and she is responsible for his safety. Of course she's scared, but she's be REALLY scared if her child died from anyphylactic shock. She HAS to step up and protect him.

[melissa ann]

I am sorry that this might sound mean, but I gotta say it. WHAT is wrong with you? IMO YOU are being a neglectful parent by not ensuring that your child is not being taken care of properly. It is YOUR job to protect him and YOU are failing to do so. YOU need to call licensing and report this. ALL of this. YOU are a mandated reporter, and if they are doing this with your child, I can imagine they are with others as well. YOU need to call and put a stop to it.

As for the harrassment, you need to call the labor board and report it. They will step in and ensure that a stop is put to it.

No amount of money in the world would stop me from reporting this and taking a chance at losing my job. Public assistance is available to you and I'd look into it now.

[Ariana]

I would get myself to the nearest womens resource centre and talk to someone about what's going on. This is beyond ridiculous.

[frgsonmysox]

As a mom you have to do WHATEVER it takes to keep your son safe, and he is not safe in a daycare that is ignoring his medical needs. If that means you walk barefoot over hot coals to do so, do it! No one said it was going to be easy, but you can't just not do anything. YOU are the only one to be an advocate for him, he NEEDS you do that.

As for the cloth thing - ridiculous! We use cloth too, even in the hospital right after birth. My kids have never worn a disposable diaper. I plan to not only allow cloth in my daycare, but also to highly encourage it.

[youretooloud]

I understand what you are saying, but ultimitley she is putting her childin harms way and she is responsible for his safety. Of course she's scared, but she's be REALLY scared if her child died from anyphylactic shock. She HAS to step up and protect him.

But, that's why she came here to ask. Not all areas have a lot of choices. Most areas don't have a "nearest women's center", and those that do are not always open when the women need the help. I live in a huge city, and I couldn't even begin to find a women's center that would help with a situation like this.

She did exactly as I would do, she came to the internet for help and advice. Not that my post was at all helpful... I merely agreed with her, but at least I didn't accuse her of being a bad mom.

I salute a mom who wants to work and make her child's life better!!! I think she's doing her best, and we could at least take the time to give real advice instead of telling her she's hurting her child.

[Crystal]

But, that's why she came here to ask. Not all areas have a lot of choices. Most areas don't have a "nearest women's center", and those that do are not always open when the women need the help. I live in a huge city, and I couldn't even begin to find a women's center that would help with a situation like this.

She did exactly as I would do, she came to the internet for help and advice. Not that my post was at all helpful... I merely agreed with her, but at least I didn't accuse her of being a bad mom.

I salute a mom who wants to work and make her child's life better!!! I think she's doing her best, and we could at least take the time to give real advice instead of telling her she's hurting her child.

I'm glad she came here and asked for advice. I gave her the advice she NEEDED to hear, whether it is liked or not. She herself said that her child is being put in danger every day because of the food allergies and the center staff feeding him these foods anyway, which could SERIOUSLY harm or potentially kill him. As a parent it is not only her responsibility to ask others for advice but to ACT to ensure that her child is safe. She is not doing so by continuing to allow this to happen.