Newly lLcensed...1st Child, Need advice!

[Guest]

I am watching my 1st child for about 4 months now he is an almost 8 month old boy. His parents have him on a eat sleep schedule that is almost impossible to keep to but I have been trying my very best. I am hoping someone can help me with a few of the struggles I'm encountering because like I said I am newly licensed and this is my first child i've watched.

1. Not being dressed properly- it's been very cool where I live lately and he's in summer clothes with no jacket or blanket or anything and in my contract the parents know we go down the street to the park sometimes with my own child. I have been having to dress him in my own childs clothes sometimes.

2. He has had a cold for over 2 weeks and it's not getting any better. He even had a 100.2 temp yesterday and I let his Mom know and they still have not tried to take him to the Dr. What do most people do in this situation? He has been cranky, not sleeping well, runny nose everywhere!

3. His pacifiers that his parents bring have lost their seal or something and moisture is getting inside them and it's even turned brown (gross!). I put them in a zip loc bag and let his mom know so she could throw them away but instead she washed them in the dishwasher?!

None of these things would happen with my own children ever so i'm struggling to deal with how to approach the parents on this. They are not bad parents but I think they are just clueless and because i'm newly licensed and it's my 1st family I just want to make sure I handle this the right way...if i'm over reacting please let me know! It's driving me crazy!

[thatgagirl]

You need to put your foot down!!!

1. DEMAND that they bring weather appropriate clothing for the child, remind them you go to the park and he is COLD. Just flat out ask them to bring warmer clothes so he isnt cold.

2. Send him home! If he is sick he needs to go home, a cold that lasts 2 weeks may not be a cold, he needs to see a dr. If he comes sick tomorrow tell parents that he needs to see a dr before he can come back. He could be getting your children and other daycare kids sick.

3. Throw it out. Tell mom, i went to give *** the paci and mold was growing inside so I had to toss it. Then tell her to remember to send another tomorrow.

You have set the bar of them running you over and it WILL NOT stop until you make it! Do you have a contract and handbook (i see now you do) maybe you should do a refresher? I send out my handbook again annually in the fall so that they can make a point to read it. Just tell them you updated some policies and ask them to read it

[Michael]

....and welcome to the forum djs!

[djs]

Thank you very much for the advice...I feel so re assured to know I am not over reacting! Hopefully tomorrow goes well!

[AfterSchoolMom]

The brown pacifier is just gross. I agree, just tell them that it was gross or that it fell apart, so you were forced to throw it away.

If he's not wearing weather appropriate clothes and using a brown, dirty pacifier, I'd say it's no wonder he's sick. It sounds like these parents just need to be informed.

What do you have in your contract on these issues? I've learned the hard way that you have to STICK WITH IT!!

[sahm2three]

Ummmm....maybe the bacteria growing INSIDE the paci is MAKING him sick?! LOL! Some people!!! Yep, I would throw it out! Demand they bring clothes, or if they don't like one family I have, I bought what I needed from a rummage sale and handed dcmom the bill! She got the hint! LOL! Good luck and one thing I always try to keep in mind is that you teach people how to treat you! Don't let them take advantage or not follow rules now! It won't stop otherwise!

[tymaboy]

All the kids that start with me go on my schedule, what works best for me & the other kids in care. If they want him on a certain schedule they can have it at their home. The kids I have are here 8+ hours (closer to 11hours) I have the kids more then the parents do.

Do you have a policy? Does it have an illness section in it? Mine states if a child has a fever higher then 100 they go home & cant come back for 24 symptom free. I know some providers have had to flat out tell parents that their child could not come back to care without seeing a Dr. I never had to do that. But there are parents that feel they just cant be bothered & they have better things to do or their job is more important then their child. Dont be surprised that when you push the illness subject with parents that they'll tell you he/she is just teething, everything gets blamed on teething.

For the clothes that is hard cuz you will have great parents that make sure you have everything & others that dont care & figure you can just stay in or use your back up clothes for their little one. When I 1st opened I had all kinds of back up clothes & they slowly went out the door & never came back. I had to start charging a clothing fee, if they returned the clothe they do not get charged if they dont they get charged $10. The parents I have now keep a couple outfits here & I will hand them the outfits to exchange them when the seasons change or they out grow them. Some providers that do not have the parents bring a change of clothes will send the parents back home (with child) to get the appropriate clothing. They do that when they have talked to the parent several times. (they also do that on pay day as well, when a parent forgot their check book)

[Lilbutterflie]

Let me first say that I was a working mom for 4 years before I became a daycare provider; so I see things from a parent's perspective, too. That being said, I knew that part of putting your child in daycare is no longer having control of your child's schedule... the child conforms to the daycare schedule (with the exception of newborn to about 6 months; I let them sleep & eat on their own schedules). People who want or need control over their children's naptime and eating schedules need to hire a nanny.

Yes, throw that nasty pacifier away!!

In my contract I state that a weather-appropriate change of clothes is required to stay at my house, and an extra sweatshirt or jacket in the cold weather. Some daycare providers keep some extra clothes on hand just in case, you could look at a garage sale or second hand store & it shouldn't cost you too much. Or you could hand the mom the bill as stated above!

Also in my contract any fever over 100 means the child needs to picked up promptly, and not return until fever-free for 24 hours. I also state that in some cases, to my discretion, a doctor's note is required prior to their return. This is for the benefit of EVERYONE so that the cycle of illness can be broken upon the first child who gets sick.

Good luck! I agree with the previous posts... you definitely need to set things straight with the parents about your expectations. Don't let them get away with anything that is against your policies in your contract. If these things aren't in your contract yet, add them now! I am a fairly new daycare provider as well, and I have changed my contract along the way MANY times already!

[djs]

Thank you!

Thank you everyone! I will be re doing my contract ASAP! I had something very, very basic and I was really more concerned with being stiffed on $$ than having issues like this so my contract is more about being paid on time than anything else ...the dcb went to the Dr. yesterday and I did get a Dr note... It is just a cold and I'm hoping it goes away soon...and the parents even thanked me for watching him while "under the weather" and brought me a gift this morning as an extra thank you so I'm thinking they got the hint! I just wanted to thank everyone again for their feed back and it's nice to have found a place to talk about these issues with people who really understand!

[Michael]

Thank you everyone! I will be re doing my contract ASAP! I had something very, very basic and I was really more concerned with being stiffed on $$ than having issues like this so my contract is more about being paid on time than anything else ...the dcb went to the Dr. yesterday and I did get a Dr note... It is just a cold and I'm hoping it goes away soon...and the parents even thanked me for watching him while "under the weather" and brought me a gift this morning as an extra thank you so I'm thinking they got the hint! I just wanted to thank everyone again for their feed back and it's nice to have found a place to talk about these issues with people who really understand!

Glad you found us too. Also, here are some earlier threads that may help with your rewriting your contract: https://www.daycare.com/forum/tags.php?tag=contract