Have You Ever Had To Report A Parent To CPS?

[mismatchedsocks]

What if it happened while being strapped in car seat? What did mom say happened? What other signs, other then the bruises, is there that there is abuse? Or just thinking becuase of weird placement of this last bruise?

Bruises happen. Some kids are more prone to bruises then others. I would document it, take a picture, and you should have already asked mom and written in medical log.

[countrymom]

are there other signs, like poor eating, complaining the bruises hurt, afraid of parents... because my dd is 7 and had a big bruise inside her thigh, how she got it we don't know, she has had bruises on her butt too, not from spanking but from rough play, even the swing hitting her butt will leave a mark.

For all you people who said to call, I'm going to tell you that it ****s when someone calls on you because "you are mandatory to report everything" you guys have no idea what you are talking about unless you have been called on, I know because last year a bus driver called on us. Last year the second week of school, my 2 younger kids (7 and 9) were hitting each other outside, so when the bus pulled up I told the kids that if they behave this way on the bus the bus driver was going to spank their butts and laughed about it. Thats all I said, well guess who showed up at my door the following week, cas. They talked to all the kids, asked a million questions, had to call the school, call the drs office because its on the forms that they have to fill, this went on for months. She even said that it was wrong for her too call because I didn't threaten the children, there was nothing wrong with the kids or anything. She said that unless you have alot of proof and really see that something is wrong, then call but for what she called in for was wrong. I knew it was her, she even said that all these daycare kids where witnesses (only my kids where outside) so after 6 months she closed the file, but it was very humilating, I couldn't even go to the parent council meeting because they had to talk to the principal, how embarressing.

so before all you people start harping and saying that you have to call, you better have some frickin good proof that the children are abused before you turn someones world upside down!!

[countrymom]

I should add, that after that she drove the bus for 2 more months but I refused to talk to her, wave to her even acknowledge her because she could have cost me my daycare, she ended up quitting.

[AmandasFCC]

I agree with Crystal. This is not something I personally would report if there were no other questionable signs. My daughter and I BOTH are covered in bruises, we don't beat each other up I'm just clumsy and walk into tables a lot, and my daughter climbs things ALL the time. When she was younger (under 2) she always had bruises on the meaty part of her thighs simply from climbing.

Like others have said, you're the only one here who knows this child and the parents, but if there were no other signs of abuse, I would chalk it up to kids being kids.

[Blackcat31]

The rules in my state say, "A mandated reporter must report physical abuse, sexual abuse or neglect to a child when the reporter (knows of an incident) or has reason to believe (suspects) that a child has been abused or neglected within the preceding three years."

I take this to mean that if YOU suspect anything fishy or out of character in regards to this child and the incident that cause the bruising then you must report it.
ONLY you can decipher what you think.

I would think you would have to know the whole child and family in order to make that decision. I don't think any of us on this forum can tell you what you should or shouldn't do.

If you suspect abuse based on any knowledge (past or present) then call.

If you do not suspect anything and feel the mom gave a reasonable explanation that makes sense in regards to their normal behavior, then document and don't call.

The question isn't whether to call or not; it is what do you believe? If you believe it is abuse, you are obligated to call.

[Crystal]

This! I can't believe people are telling you to let it go. Professionally you are obligated to report suspicion of abuse.

Nobody is telling her to let it go. I, for instance, recommended photographing and documenting it and being vigilant about checking daily for other signs of abuse. That isn't letting it go. It is gathering the facts to back you up. THEN if there seems to be indicators of abuse, you report.

ONE suspicious bruise is NOT a reason to involve CPS. If there are other indicators, then yes, the bruise would be suspicious, but if there aren't, then it is probably simply a bruise.

[Crystal]

OP.....does the bruise look like finger tips caused it, or is it a solid 4 inch bruise?

[sharlan]

This is such a difficult issue. You're d&&&ed if you make the call, you're d&&&ed if you don't.

I personally had a friend who lost her 3 yo for over 6 mos because her provider called CPS with a false accusation. This was during the McMartin era when kids were being pulled from home without proper investigations. The trauma this child endured from the hands of CPS was unreal.

I had a foster daughter that the new social worker was going to return her to her mother without having ever met either one. He backed down after I went to her former social worker with crack vials I found in my front yard after the mother left. His reasoning, he couldn't prove the crack vials belonged to the mother, they could have been mine.

[sharlan]

Also, there could be a medical reason for the bruising.

We took my daughter to the dr with a large number of documented bruises. She has a factor 9 bleeding disorder, small bumps cause large bruises..

[daycare]

Also, there could be a medical reason for the bruising.

We took my daughter to the dr with a large number of documented bruises. She has a factor 9 bleeding disorder, small bumps cause large bruises..

I had two daycare kids with this..... looks like someone beat them. mom was very upfront about it and told me right away and said if necessary she would get a doctors note...

[e.j.]

What if it happened while being strapped in car seat?

This happened to one of my 2 year old dc kids just this past month. She was trying to buckle herself into the carseat and she pinched the skin of her inner thigh. I'd mention it to the mother at pick up and ask what happened. If her explanation makes sense, I'd make a note in her file but not report her at this point.

[familyschoolcare]

What if it happened while being strapped in car seat? What did mom say happened? What other signs, other then the bruises, is there that there is abuse? Or just thinking becuase of weird placement of this last bruise?

Bruises happen. Some kids are more prone to bruises then others. I would document it, take a picture, and you should have already asked mom and written in medical log.

If the bruise was received by the car seat then it will line up and CPS will discover that quickly if it is a common as you imply then they will be used to here that for times when it did and did not happen that way. Again if it makes you even think that there might be abuse you must report and in my state.

[familyschoolcare]

If I was a parent, and my child got a bruise or bump and I was reported to CPS, you better bet I would be finding a new provider. I think in these situations where the issue is very questionable, that people should not jump to conclusions and assume the parent is abusive. I am all for reporting if in fact there is proof and you know for sure, but it appears you already asked the mom and she gave you an answer.

The way the law is worded in my state I must jump to conclusions I am not supposed to ask the child anything past how did you get that "mark" and I am not supposed to ask the parent anything past what happened. I am not supposed to ask follow up questions and the punishment on my end for not reporting is a huge fine and possible jail time. Not worth it to not hurt your feelings. My contracts states that I am a mandated reporter and that I can not be held responsible for anything that happen when I call CPS and tell the truth. If A parent pulls out because I called CPS and told the truth then they are still responsible for two weeks notice.

[daycare]

The way the law is worded in my state I must jump to conclusions I am not supposed to ask the child anything past how did you get that "mark" and I am not supposed to ask the parent anything past what happened. I am not supposed to ask follow up questions and the punishment on my end for not reporting is a huge fine and possible jail time. Not worth it to not hurt your feelings. My contracts states that I am a mandated reporter and that I can not be held responsible for anything that happen when I call CPS and tell the truth. If A parent pulls out because I called CPS and told the truth then they are still responsible for two weeks notice.

I am in california and several years ago I worked in a domestic violence shelter for women and children. I have attend over 500 hours of DV and CA classes. I have also recently attend a child abuse class through my county.

This is straight out of my handbook that I was given:

Physical Abuse
• Unexplained or repeated injuries such as welts, bruises, or burns.
• Injuries that are in the shape of an object (belt buckle, electric cord, etc.)
• Injuries not likely to happen given the age or ability of the child. For example, broken bones in a child too young to walk or climb.
• Disagreement between the child's and the parent's explanation of the injury.

We do have to ask the parents what happend and give them the chance to explain. CPS would have millions of phone calls a day if we were to just report everything without explanation of injury.

• Unreasonable explanation of the injury.
• Obvious neglect of the child (dirty, undernourished, inappropriate clothes for the weather, lack of medical or dental care).
• Fearful behavior.
Emotional - Verbal Abuse
• Aggressive or withdrawn behavior.
• Shying away from physical contact with parents or adults.
• Afraid to go home.
Sexual Abuse
• Child tells you he/she was sexually mistreated.
• Child has physical signs such as:
o difficulty in walking or sitting.
o stained or bloody underwear.
o genital or rectal pain, itching, swelling, redness, or discharge

(sexual abuse contd)
o bruises or other injuries in the genital or rectal area.
• Child has behavioral and emotional signs such as:
o difficulty eating or sleeping.
o soiling or wetting pants or bed after being potty trained.
o acting like a much younger child.
o excessive crying or sadness.
o withdrawing from activities and others.
o talking about or acting out sexual acts beyond normal sex play for age.
Abuse can happen in any family, regardless of any special characteristics. However, in dealing with parents, be aware of characteristics of families in which abuse may be more likely:
• Families who are isolated and have no friends, relatives, church or other support systems.
• Parents who tell you they were abused as children.
• Families who are often in crisis (have money problems, move often).
• Parents who abuse drugs or alcohol.
• Parents who are very critical of their child.
• Parents who are very rigid in disciplining their child.
• Parents who show too much or too little concern for their child.
• Parents who feel they have a difficult child.
• Parents who are under a lot of stress.

Steps that the provider will take if abuse is suspected:
• Take the child to a quiet, private area.
• Gently encourage the child to give you enough information to evaluate whether abuse may have occurred.
• Remain calm so as not to upset the child.
• If the child reveals the abuse, reassure him/her that you believe him/her, that he/she is right to tell you, and that he/she is not bad.
• Tell the child you are going to talk to persons who can help him/her.
• Return the child to the group (if appropriate).
• Record all information.
• Immediately report the suspected abuse to the proper local authorities.
• Parent will not be informed.

[Crazy8]

do you honestly suspect abuse - like before this mark on the childs inner thigh - did you suspect there may be abuse in their household??? I understand being a mandated reporter but I would not base a decision to call on one bruise because you feel is in a stranger than "normal" location. I have seen children fall off chairs, fall between the toilet and sink in a bathroom - all places where that inner thigh bruise could happen. Straps from a highchair or carseat while they were wearing shorts/diaper could do it. Like someone else said, I've seen bruises on the butts - guess how they got it - from plopping down onto a toy that was on the floor - that diaper doesn't always protect their little bottom.

I would not call JUST based on a bruise that you think is a stranger than normal location - yes, I'm a mandated reporter but a bruise on a toddler does not make me suspect child abuse - it makes me suspect an active toddler. You know the history of what else you've seen with this family and see this child every day - no one else on this board does so this is a decision only you can make.