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Biting can be learned, but it is also a very natural part of development for some children. It can be done to explore "cause and effect" and can also be a natural part of oral development. We have to teach them not to bite their friends, but you can provide other alternatives. One great option is fruit chews!! You have to be careful not to give them right after a bite, obviously, so it isn't a "reward." But, just giving a biter lots of oral stimulation can often alleviate their "need" to bite other kids!
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interesting last post....I personally would not do anything that might encourage that need for "oral stimulation". Every kid has things that they want to do that just are not acceptable. I think that providing fruit chews is accommodating the biter instead of helping them learn that biting is not acceptable. I don't allow chewing either for kids old enough to not be doing that. Definitely by 1 year old, I don't let the kids chew on toys, **** on stuff, bite or slobber on things. Its very unsanitary in group care and I feel it is better to curb that desire instead of letting them go at it or providing alternatives that are okay to **** on, etc. thats just my two cents. my own middle daughter was a biter and we nipped that in the bud fast.Comment
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It sounds like you want the issue to go away by using discipline with the child as opposed to honing in on the reasons behind it. The fruit chew theory is something I learned at a traiing given by a child dev elopment expert and we tested in a toddler setting at a large center - with success!
Negative reinforcement does work on some children and I suspect you used some kind of punishment with your own children to "nip it in the bud" tha you likely cannot use with your daycare kids. If you're wanting the parent to handle it at home, then good luck to you!
As for me, I ust use a lot of bleach water b/c infants and toddlers need oral stimulation to adequately develop their whole sensory-motor systems in their brain! (I'm a big nerd, though! I've studied a lot of brain development stuff!) Biting is always a difficult issue to tackle, because I do agree that it CAN be learned. But, if parents allow it at home, and aren't willing to change, it's going to make things very hard for you!!!
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Biting
I've been lucky so far (knock on wood!) and biting hasn't really been an issue here. I worked at a center before opening a home daycare and I wasn't so lucky there. It wasn't so much that there were a lot of biters, but it was the fact that the biters in my class were highly unpredictable.
I was desparate to find a way to get it to stop and I tried to learn as much as I could about biting. I asked a lot of questions and I got a lot of advice on the matter. Shadowing was recommended a lot but that shouldn't have to be the answer. Besides, it's not always possible to have a staff member who is available just to shadow one biter. Since it was a center that I wasn't in charge of, there was nothing that I could do other than ask the director for help. She said that I would just have to shadow him on my own because the budget wouldn't cover an extra staff member just because of one kid. My class was the 12months-30months group and I was often put in the position of being out of ratio for a good 1.5 hours every morning because the center didn't want to hire another person or risk having any of the staff go over 40 hours a week. How can one person shadow a biter and still be able to give the other kids the care that they deserve? There were mornings when it was just me and 8 toddlers, one of which was the worst biter that I've ever seen! Shadowing is nice when it can be done, but it's not a solution.
I learned to notice the warning signs and it's made a big difference because then I could step in and the situation didn't have the chance to escalate. Some kids have a tendency to get frustrated more easily than others and if the child doesn't have the words to use yet, then they will try to find other outlets for frustration and anger. It doesn't have to be a learned behavior. I've seen kids lash out by hitting or pushing at that age and nobody was consciously teaching them to do it. It's human nature to need an outlet and if a child isn't able to use their words to express frustration or anger, then they will find a way to get it out of their systems! Obviously that's a problem because it's not cool to bite, hit or shove our friends. With the biter in my class, I would have terminated him because of the severity of his biting and the parents of the biter weren't helpful at all. The director wouldn't let the family go because of the money but they ended up losing another family with 2 kids because of the biter. I couldn't do much about the situation and it ****ed. That was one of the reasons that I wanted to start my own daycare.
I teach my kids sign language from infancy. I know that it doesn't mean anything to an infant at that moment but I still use it and say the words so that I can give them a way to let me (and their dck buddies) know what they need. I work on teaching them how to communicate when they are hungry or thirsty or if they want more or if they are done. I teach them sign language that will cover if they're sleepy or if they are in pain. Same goes for sharing toys and other situations that crop up. It's worked so far for me, but it might be more effective because of a smaller group and staggered ages.
If a child is consistently biting, then it might be better for that family to part ways. It's understandable that it happens and as long as it is an isolated incident, then it doesn't have to result in a termination. My advice is to make it a BIG deal the very first time it happens, not just to the biter, but to the parents of the biter as well. It seems mean, but it beats having to deal with a child constantly biting because the parents make excuses for the biting. It's in everyone's best interest to address it fast and firm!Comment
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no I did not use discipline with my middle daughter for biting. we did the same thing I do with my daycare kids, shadow them, figure out and avoid the triggers, a firm no and remove them from the situation if a bite is about to happen. Most of my daycare kids do a lot of stuff at home that is not allowed here. Even very young toddlers can be capable of seeing that some things that are okay with mom are not okay at daycare. I don't think it takes a study on brain development to figure that out. Parents allowing stuff at home does make it harder to curb unwanted behaviors but not impossible by any stretch of the imagination. I have kids that have horrible table manners, lots of crying and whining, lots of comfort items and a multitude of stuff allowed at home that is not allowed here and it is amazing to see the change once they walk through the door. I had a 1 year old so obsessive about her paci at home and as soon as she would walk thru the door I would open her bag and she would readily drop the paci, sippy, blanket and lovey toy into the bag where they would stay till the end of the day at which point mom would give it all back. I do agree that figuring out the reasons behind something is a good first step on addressing an issue but just because there is a specific reason behind a distruptive behavior still does not mean that you have to allow it. I don't discipline to get rid of the ****ing/chewing/slobbering. I just tell them no until they give up doing that here and are then able to use their time doing activities that are much more exciting than sitting there and ****ing on their thumb, meanwhile missing out on learning and fun.Comment
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