Would You Call CPS...

[youretooloud]

Based on something the older child told you about the younger child?

Hypothetically, lets say, the older child is seven, and the younger one is four?

And... Hypothetically, the older child said the younger one was being given margaritas and wine coolers almost every night because she's being so bad.... (she is pretty obnoxious) and hypothetically, you are pretty sure these parents would do this.

But, you have no proof.

Would you make the call?

[SimpleMom]

yep, I would if I was sure it wasn't stories. Even then, if a little one even knew what a "drink" was and to say it in that context that would be a red flag. Yikes! I hope they are not really doing that!

[cheerfuldom]

Have you questioned the 7 year old a little further? Are you sure he knows what he is talking about? Perhaps the parents were having a drink and made a joke about doing this or he misunderstood something about this situation.

[Michelle]

yep, I would if I was sure it wasn't stories. Even then, if a little one even knew what a "drink" was and to say it in that context that would be a red flag. Yikes! I hope they are not really doing that!

We have to report even if we "suspect".
We are mandated reporters.
Ask the child what kind of cup he drank out of. It doesn't matter what kind, I'm just wondering if the parents joke about giving them a drink or actually doing it.
Sometimes having to give an actual factual detail like that will help but still , we have to report regardless.
how sad

[3kidzmama]

I would definitely report it, but just know that even if it's true it may not have any consequences. As an elementary teacher, I've reported lots of incidents. One that sounds similar was this second grader telling me about his dad giving him marijuana. He even used the terminology like "blunt" and "joint". He said his dad wanted to calm him down at night (he was quite hyper and not medicated for ADHD). So I made the call. DCFS interviewed the boy at school and talked to his mother, and never followed up. I know because I told his mother that it was me that turned it in and why. She laughed and replied that "they didn't find anything" and that she and her baby daddy (not married) would do what they wanted with their kid. Sad.

[youretooloud]

Have you questioned the 7 year old a little further? Are you sure he knows what he is talking about? Perhaps the parents were having a drink and made a joke about doing this or he misunderstood something about this situation.

Ya... I was making jokes with her.

The thing is, when she (the seven yr old) was two, she went to a party with her parents, and she walked around the whole party drinking all the mixed drinks people had set down. She was so sick they had to take her to the hospital. She doesn't remember that, but they still talk about it.

So, I was wondering if she was just repeating THAT story. Maybe she's just remembering the story wrong.

I would SWEAR that I can remember watching my dad's car be towed out of a ditch when I was very little. But, they SWEAR I wasn't even in the same state when that happened, and that I just have two stories mixed up.

[youretooloud]

We have to report even if we "suspect".
We are mandated reporters.
Ask the child what kind of cup he drank out of. It doesn't matter what kind, I'm just wondering if the parents joke about giving them a drink or actually doing it.
Sometimes having to give an actual factual detail like that will help but still , we have to report regardless.
how sad

She says they share mommy's or daddy's drink. But, two year old will only drink wine coolers and margaritas. So, she's drinking out of their glass or bottle.

[Crystal]

I'd make the call and let CPS decide. I think you already know the answer to your question though, and don't need our opinion anyway....but you do have our support. Good luck.

[sharlan]

We have to report even if we "suspect".
We are mandated reporters.
Ask the child what kind of cup he drank out of. It doesn't matter what kind, I'm just wondering if the parents joke about giving them a drink or actually doing it.
Sometimes having to give an actual factual detail like that will help but still , we have to report regardless.
how sad

In CA you have to report if you suspect that the story MAY be true. If something happens and you haven't reported it, you can be held liable.

[countrymom]

hard to say because I had one girl who every night had to have a tylenol to go to sleep (she is 5) I heard it from the boyfriends brothers sister who works with a dcm (we are good friends) so when I asked the girl about it she said it was true, she calls it a magic pill.

[sharlan]

To answer your question. Yes, I would call CPS when the children AREN'T there.

[CheekyChick]

Personally, I would speak to the oldest child further and then the parents. When my children were younger, I would make them Pina Coladas (sans alcohol). They thought it was fun! Oh, and they are both in their early 20's and have never touched "real' alcohol. Thank the Lord.

[familyschoolcare]

I was told during my health ans safety class that here in cal. we have to report anything that we think might be true. Also we are NOT to question the child(ren) further about the situation. Just call CPS and let them do their job let them deiced based on what you say wiether or not to investigate or not.

On a personal note I would take anything involving children and alcohol very seriously. My Hubby works in a lab where they test "samples" for alcohol and other "drugs" and a few ears ago he got a case where a Infant died, very sad.

[Blackcat31]

Personally, I would speak to the oldest child further and then the parents. When my children were younger, I would make them Pina Coladas (sans alcohol). They thought it was fun! Oh, and they are both in their early 20's and have never touched "real' alcohol. Thank the Lord.

Good advice Cheeky! I think that we sometimes interpret things a bit harshly. I have said things to my kids and have done things that taken out of context could be viewed very badly such as the example that Cheeky gave above. My daughter used to have a Girl's Night Out with a neighbor girl where the neighbor girls mom was their server and the girls were pampered and served all sorts of ****tails (minus the alcohol). The girls were in elementary school.

I had a dcg once tell me her dad made her get out of the car and left her on the side of the road and she was scared. When I asked her why she said because she was naughty and her dad never came back. After talking with the mom, I found out that she was left on the driveway to wait for the bus with 10 other kids like she normally was! Sometimes kid say things that they know will get a reaction. I questioned this girl and never did she say where, why and what the other details were. Just that it happened yesterday and her dad was mad and every time he is mad he leaves her on the side of the road somewhere.

Had I not had an open discussion with both parents, I wouldn't have known anything besides what this child told me. I document everything now and talk with the parent the first chance I get.

This is all good reason to have open communitcation and a good relationship wiht your dc families. It is important for us to know them and what kind of people they are for many reasons.

[sharlan]

See that's the problem with CA. You can't just document, you HAVE to report IF you have any suspicion that it MIGHT me true.